Hi @mrcbass,
[EDIT] I see there have been some more responses between the time I walked away from my post and then came back to finish. Please forgive any redundancies and profound glimpses into the obvious.
Thanks for all the sordid details. As for myself, I would be a bit leery about getting too involved with these guys on a professional musical level. You may find it frustrating after a while. I know I'm spoiled but it sounds like these guys just might not have it together enough. You've got a good perspective and you're going in with both eyes and ears open, that's great. It seems like there are
some promising aspects about this project.
I've only ever auditioned for one band in my entire "career" since I started playing for money in 1970. That band had gigs booked and we were playing them after three rehearsals. For all the other bands I was recruited through networking and I started gigging with most of them without any rehearsal at all. And most everyone I've ever worked with has had some musical training, lessons, education, etc. Like you said, the music-speak is important in order to communicate clearly. I like to be able to tell someone "It's just a I-V-vi-IV in A" and they know what I mean. It saves so much time.
Not having a workable PA system is a problem. Will you be renting? Borrowing? In my current band, three members own PA systems and we still end up hiring a sound company for most of our gigs, when the budget is there.
I wouldn't worry too much about three guitars. Give one of them an acoustic, the lead singer probably, and you should be OK as long as the other two behave themselves.
But the lead singer not knowing the arrangements could be brutal. How is his timing? Does he at least come in at the right spots? I ask because I'm currently involved in a little talent show project. I'm playing acoustic guitar accompanying a "singer" who's had no musical training and he has absolutely no rhythm, no feel for meter, sings ahead, sings behind, comes in late, comes in early, and I'm being nice, giving him pointers and tricks to use so that he sounds like he knows what he's doing. But unless I sing along with him he messes up the timing.
Oh drat. I didn't mean to make this about me but I thought I'd share some personal experiences, as if you haven't had enough personal experiences already.
Sure, give'em a chance. Hang out for a while. See if they'll live up to expectations. If your lead singer has never gigged then I wonder how serious this project is about getting good gigs. Do they know how to get good gigs? Or do they want to use this as an excuse just to get out of the house, party, and make some noise? Don't get me wrong, I like to get out of the house, make some noise, and party a bit, but I also like good music, good gigs, good fun, and good money. Dang, I'm spoiled. Thanks for putting up with this 61 year old country bass player.
Thank you for your indulgence,
BassCliff