Not true. The seal has to be good enough to reduce ambient noise to the point that you don't overdrive the monitor to compensate. The point of an IEM is to let you hear just what you want, and they do this effectively by reducing ambient sound. Another way to think of it is signal to noise ratio. The critical aspect is the seal, essentially reducing the noise so the signal (monitor feed) is heard better. You'll never have a seal that will prevent you from hearing any ambient noise (I have -33dB earmuffs for shooting, and I can still hear a hand clap through those). This is only part of the problem the OP is having, though trying different tips is a definite must. I'm a fan of the Comply foam tip family, they are excellent for ambient noise reduction.
The distortion aspect may be the buds, I would evaluate all parts of the signal chain until you can isolate the noise.
Maybe I shouldn't have said "handclap." It was probably an overstatement. Sorry 'bout that. I will say, though, that your surroundings should be essentially inaudible. And (for the OP) the reason for that isn't to make your surroundings essentially inaudible, it's to provide an indication of how good the seal is. That's because even the slightest leak will drastically reduce bass content and cause the symptoms stated. Also let me add for the OP that in my experience, the seal is either there or it's not; there's almost no middle ground where the bass is weak but still there. When I first started using IEMs I didn't realize this until I found a perfect fit, and I was stunned by how deep and powerful the bass suddenly got. The difference was instant, and huge. That's what to aim for.
One test that works is to compare your IEMs' bass response with that of a decent set of headphones. If they're not close, then the IEMs are definitely leaking.
BTW, the shooting analogy is n/a. The eardrum-damaging frequencies involved are way above the bass range. And in the IEM case we're talking about the need for an airtight seal of the ear canal; in the shooting case we're talking about the need to block high-frequency content from the ear canal, and a leaky seal can still accomplish that. Totally different situation, totally different requirements wrt isolation.
(NRA Life Member, former Home Firearms Safety Instructor.)