The anticipated downbeat in Cuban music certainly takes some getting used to.
In a pinch you can get away with resorting to a older style son montuno rhythm ( 1, 2&, 4)
instead of the more common anticipated downbeat of the tumbao (2&, 4)
The thing that truly crystallized my Cuban lines was learning the patterns of the other parts.
When you know what the congas, claves, timbales, and piano are doing,
and memorize how the
bombo (the 2& ) and
ponche (4) sounds against each of those rhythms
If becomes much easier to find your place in the ensemble.
So if you have access to congas or a piano -learn a bit of those parts.
Here is a great PDF by Victor Lopez with many examples.
One thing that confused me early on was the idea that the bass must always be "correct with the clave"
How could that be when the clave is a two bar pattern and the tumbao is just one bar?
then I realized what was meant:
View attachment 2921307
It's the last 2 beats of the clave (ponche and bombo) that need to match up.
in between, you have room for interpretation ( and forgiveness )
A great exercise you can do anywhere is to simultaneously clap and sing the clave and the tumbao. I used to do this waiting at the bus stop. Clap a clave pattern, and sing the bombo/ponche beats over it. When that felt good, I'd switch to clapping ponche/bombo and singing the clave
beyond those rhythm cues, getting lost in a tune has the same approach as any style:
rote and repetition, memorizing the larger phrases and chunks of the form and the melody.