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Guitarists do the darndest things

Here's an amusing anecdote. I started jamming with some friends a while ago. The guitarist initially had a small Fender practice amp and a Squire guitar.

After a few months he showed up with a brand new Baum guitar (~$3000 CAD). Meanwhile I had picked up a used 150w guitar combo amp for next to nothing and let him borrow it to play with all of the onboard effects.

He started using it at practice but had trouble getting it to produce enough volume. While it had been plenty loud for me the handful of times I had tried it at home, I thought that maybe it was an intermittent problem and that's why the guy sold it to me so cheap.

After about six more jam sessions, one day I was irked by what had become a typical slagging of the amp for being unreliably quiet. During a break I took a look at it and saw the gain was around 8 o'clock. I turned it up to 11 o'clock and nearly blew myself through the wall.

When the guitarist popped back in, I asked him if the problem was that the gain knob was flaky. He asked me "What does gain do?"

It turns out that all this time he had only touched the Master and FX volume knobs, because he didn't know what gain was. He learned something valuable that day!

I found it hilarious that someone (who is otherwise very smart and successful!) would be willing to spend so much money on an instrument, while being unaware of something that I had thought was absolutely fundamental to playing any electrically amplified instrument.

And now I'm kind of regretting teaching him how to increase the volume 🤣
 
One of the guys I play with had a capo on the headstock of his guitar with the capo slightly squeezing the strings between the nut and tuning keys. He tuned the guitar that way then took the capo off and put it on the neck. Couldn’t understand why the guitar was out of tune. I tried to explain it but I’m not sure he understood although I haven’t seen him do that again so maybe…
 
when we were all teens, my cousins asked me to join their band simply because they needed a bassist. i had no musical experience, but i showed up and picked up a bass. they tuned it for me, showing me that the lowest string on a guitar was the same as the highest string on a bass. then you tune by matching the next lowest string on the fifth fret. i wasn't until at least a year later that i found out basses are not generally tuned C# F# B E.
 
when we were all teens, my cousins asked me to join their band simply because they needed a bassist. i had no musical experience, but i showed up and picked up a bass. they tuned it for me, showing me that the lowest string on a guitar was the same as the highest string on a bass. then you tune by matching the next lowest string on the fifth fret. i wasn't until at least a year later that i found out basses are not generally tuned C# F# B E.
Now, if only they tuned in an octave lower, that would be two levels beyond doing BEAD with C♯ at 17.3 Hz...
 
IMG_9523.jpeg

Spinal Tap
 
Here's an amusing anecdote. I started jamming with some friends a while ago. The guitarist initially had a small Fender practice amp and a Squire guitar.

After a few months he showed up with a brand new Baum guitar (~$3000 CAD). Meanwhile I had picked up a used 150w guitar combo amp for next to nothing and let him borrow it to play with all of the onboard effects.

He started using it at practice but had trouble getting it to produce enough volume. While it had been plenty loud for me the handful of times I had tried it at home, I thought that maybe it was an intermittent problem and that's why the guy sold it to me so cheap.

After about six more jam sessions, one day I was irked by what had become a typical slagging of the amp for being unreliably quiet. During a break I took a look at it and saw the gain was around 8 o'clock. I turned it up to 11 o'clock and nearly blew myself through the wall.

When the guitarist popped back in, I asked him if the problem was that the gain knob was flaky. He asked me "What does gain do?"

It turns out that all this time he had only touched the Master and FX volume knobs, because he didn't know what gain was. He learned something valuable that day!

I found it hilarious that someone (who is otherwise very smart and successful!) would be willing to spend so much money on an instrument, while being unaware of something that I had thought was absolutely fundamental to playing any electrically amplified instrument.

And now I'm kind of regretting teaching him how to increase the volume 🤣
“Never teach guitarist the volume knob.”
- Marcbas Aurelius
 
We are all unknowledgeable until we are knowledgeable. Doing sound one time the signal from a bass plugged into my DI box sounded like a failing battery on an active instrument, and I asked the bassist if his bass was active or passive, and he could not answer that. I then asked if there was a battery case door on the back of the bass. He flipped it over, to reveal a battery box. I replaced the battery for him, and he told me he did not know that there was a battery in there. I explained to him about un-plugging the cord when not using the bass. He did not know. This guy was at least 60 years old, and had bought the bass used about a week earlier. I assume that he had been playing bass for decades.
 
{deep breath}

The amount of musicians i've met who have no idea how their gear works is a never-ending source of bewilderment for me. 🤷‍♂️ I mean, they don't need to be audio engineers. And i know a lot of musicians are musicians because they're artistic, not technical people. But, still, these are the tools of your art and you have no idea how they work or what they do? And you're not curious? Okay.... i mean, do your thing the way you want. I'm just confused by it. :laugh:

Edit to say: I'm not talking about those who don't know but are learning. I mean those who don't know and don't care to learn and just play. And even then, i'm not really judging so much as confused by it.
 
Here's an amusing anecdote. I started jamming with some friends a while ago. The guitarist initially had a small Fender practice amp and a Squire guitar.

After a few months he showed up with a brand new Baum guitar (~$3000 CAD). Meanwhile I had picked up a used 150w guitar combo amp for next to nothing and let him borrow it to play with all of the onboard effects.

He started using it at practice but had trouble getting it to produce enough volume. While it had been plenty loud for me the handful of times I had tried it at home, I thought that maybe it was an intermittent problem and that's why the guy sold it to me so cheap.

After about six more jam sessions, one day I was irked by what had become a typical slagging of the amp for being unreliably quiet. During a break I took a look at it and saw the gain was around 8 o'clock. I turned it up to 11 o'clock and nearly blew myself through the wall.

When the guitarist popped back in, I asked him if the problem was that the gain knob was flaky. He asked me "What does gain do?"

It turns out that all this time he had only touched the Master and FX volume knobs, because he didn't know what gain was. He learned something valuable that day!

I found it hilarious that someone (who is otherwise very smart and successful!) would be willing to spend so much money on an instrument, while being unaware of something that I had thought was absolutely fundamental to playing any electrically amplified instrument.

And now I'm kind of regretting teaching him how to increase the volume 🤣
I don't get it. You almost regret helping someone because he was ignorant of something or because he is a guitarist? 🤔
 
I don't get it. You almost regret helping someone because he was ignorant of something or because he is a guitarist? 🤔
It was a tongue in cheek statement (thus the 🤣 emoji), with the joke regret being that he now he knows how to turn the volume up to ear-blistering levels (as all guitarists are stereotyped as doing, per TB conventions).