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help! i need advice!

Jake Morris

Jake Morris

Jun 10, 2009
690
7
North Jersey
www.facebook.com
#1
So I'm in a band and the drummer and I are going to leave the guitarrists/singer for many reasons. 1. His ego. 2. His control 3. His dad is too involved. (Kinda creepy) 4. Lack of talent and willingness to improve. There's much more, but moving on.

I checked our facebook page and the guitarrist removed the drummer and I as admins because he felt we were leaving him after we sat down and had a talk about the direction of the band and how we are moving on with or without him. We are going to let him go within two days, and I don't know what to do with the page. Does the drummer and I get the page since we hooked up with other musicians? Does he get it cuz he's alone? Oh and he won't be playing with any other musicians ever again since no one but me and the drummer can stand him. (But not anymore). The thing is the name of the band is stupid and unusable, and we can't change it according to facebook. (Too many fans) I thought we should just take down the page. No one gets it.
 
#5
I am capable of removing any admin. He'll know if I remove him now. I just talked to him and he thinks we r cool and we r going to have a practice after school Monday. So Monday morning right before school, I'll unadd him and he won't be able to tell cuz his phone is not capable of internet and stuff, but mine is. We r having a practice tomorrow, and we'll sit down with him then and go over it. Does this sound good? Cuz I don't want him getting suspicious during the day @ school and that can get hectic.
 
#7
Yeah, I totally agree, but this guitarrists will post stuff sayin stuff like the drummer and bassist wasn't good enough for him, or stupid bs worse than that. I just don't want any gossip going around, since all the fans are friends of me, the drummer, and guitarrist. Oh and the guitarrist and I have been close close friends since when I was in 6th and he was in 7th. Now I'm a freshman and he's a sophmore, but we are still only a month apart age wise. Like I still want to be friends, but don't want to have to play with him anymore. This is really getting me upset. Like keep playing and keep a friend, or leave him and lose the friend. But most of my friends are closer friends with the guitarrist.
 
#10
MycooLeeyun said:
yeah.. this seems a bit dramatic. Do what you gotta do and move on. I'm sure if you have that many fans on facebook, they will support your "new" band.
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I would say 20% of fans are really my friends, 50% are the guitarrists, and 30% are the drummers. Oh and with kids nowadays, they just "like" the pages that all their friends like and whatever shows up on their fbook page. Its crazy. They don't even listen to the music on band's pages.
 
#13
I kinda feel sorry for you kiddo. When I was your age we didn't have any "technogadgets" so if you wanted to badmouth someone you had to pass notes about in class or else actually do it face to face.

If you go all superspy on it and lock your mate out of the site you will likely lose him as a mate. You'll just have to man up and tell him the truth.

If he can't handle the truth and badmouths you all over the site that nobody will look at after you disband, well too bad. Get on with making music you like and hopefully get some real fans who will come to your gigs. Forget about the fakefriends bs.

You're going to get oder and wiser and one day you'll look back on these days and go "why did I get so strung out over that stuff?"
 
#14
Downunderwonder said:
I kinda feel sorry for you kiddo. When I was your age we didn't have any "technogadgets" so if you wanted to badmouth someone you had to pass notes about in class or else actually do it face to face.

If you go all superspy on it and lock your mate out of the site you will likely lose him as a mate. You'll just have to man up and tell him the truth.

If he can't handle the truth and badmouths you all over the site that nobody will look at after you disband, well too bad. Get on with making music you like and hopefully get some real fans who will come to your gigs. Forget about the fakefriends bs.

You're going to get oder and wiser and one day you'll look back on these days and go "why did I get so strung out over that stuff?"
Click to expand...

yeah i guess. but where i go 2 school, the only music people listen to is all that pop bs stuff thats all generic and boring, oh and painful to listen to. so do you think i should let him keep the page and have that, that way we remain friends?
 
#17
It's never easy to fire a bandmate, whether you're fifteen or fifty five. There's just usually more drama at you guy's ages simply because of a maturity factor. In teen years, there's still some of that "stick your tongue out" at each other that we all did as little kids. that gradually goes away with age (usually!). (Please don't take offense at that, it's just human nature.) ;)

All that said.....try to approach it in a mature, businesslike manner. Tell him that you and the drummer feel you'd be better served musically with some personnel changes, and you would like to remain friends, and will support him in his next endeavor.
Explain that you want to keep the facebook page since your fans are familiar with you. If you're changing the band name, you can notate that on facebook, and create a link to the new website.

Just be forthright, don't be sneaky. Be as businesslike as possible. Sometimes that's hard when dealing with an immature person, but it's about all you can do.
good luck!
 

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