I know that some players are self-obsessed, but this?

[Fretlessaurus]

Next time try a musician instead of a guitarist.

 

[Tim de Martino]

He could very well be dealing with a whole lotta other mental stuff (don't ask how I know...). You still gotta do what ya gotta do, but just saying.

 

[FenderB]

Make him your manager.

 

[Smooth_bass88]

Why on earth would anyone ever play with someone like this? Life's too short!!!

 

[Lance Bunyon]

"free jazz"...

 

[SAlcott]

The difference between real musicians and the other kind is that the real ones know there's something to know.

 

[J Wilson]

To paraphrase, 'Narcissism never sleeps'.

 

[Five or Six]

You sure did enable a dud!

 

[Ekulati]

We are who we roll with.

 

[red_rhino]

I loaned him a battery amp for busking. I asked to borrow it back for one open mic. Only then did he tell me that he'd pawned it many times, and it was in the pawn shop that day.

Band member or not, I'd have been done with anyone who pulled that. Right then, right there.

Too bad he quit so you can't fire him.

I'm surprised he lasted beyond "pawn shop". Not to be mean, but anything beyond that was kinda on you guys. That said, he won't be the last person like this that you encounter along the way. You learned a valuable lesson (one that we all learn cuz we've all been there too); just be sure to remember it.

 

[dbsfgyd1]

I had a lead guitarist in my band for a year. He's self-obsessed to a mind-boggling level. He's also kind and thoughtful, giving him two extremes.

His breaks are samey. All he wants to do is play as many notes as he can as fast as he can. He's been told many times that his notes don't always fit the chords, but his answer is 'What do you mean?' It doesn't help that he won't learn anything. Every break is made up there and then. He doesn't 'want to learn open chords'. He won't learn where any of the notes are. Ask him which barre chords he's playing, and he will say 'I don't know'.

We went through a phase, when he would play his shredding in every outro and keep going for seconds afterwards. He had to be told about it at every gig for weeks, before he stopped. The last time it happened, I told him 'You overshot the endings.' His answer was 'What do mean?'

I loaned him a battery amp for busking. I asked to borrow it back for one open mic. Only then did he tell me that he'd pawned it many times, and it was in the pawn shop that day.

I gave him the job of booking us gigs. He had to be told which venues to go to, every time and had to be reminded time and again. In all those months, he booked two. He didn't tell me about one of them for two months.

We had an agreed on a demo of our four strongest songs, two written by each of us and sung by the writer. He put two different songs on a national radio website, under his own name and only his songs. The rest of us got a credit as though we were his backing band.

I practice daily to jam tracks of our songs and sent him some without any guitar on, for his practising. He wouldn't use them, even though he was practising some of them wrong.

I asked him to learn a scale. He then left the band, saying that he couldn't work 'within the confines' of the band. I told him that he should have told about feeling confined. His answer was 'I don't feel confined'.

And you are working with this guy why? Life is way too short.

 

[HardNHeavy]

I loaned him a battery amp for busking. I asked to borrow it back for one open mic. Only then did he tell me that he'd pawned it many times, and it was in the pawn shop that day.

oh hell no!

 

[Discount Bassy]

Your patience is noteworthy.

 

[Hummergeist]

It's good that he quit, but make sure you don't relent if he comes crawling back because nobody else will have him.

 

[Marc DLarosa]

Is this real?

 

[Watchootognbout]

Understand?

 

[themickster]

And you are working with this guy why? Life is way too short.

There's a lot of good in him as well

 

[themickster]

Is this real?

Every word is true.

View attachment 5100725

Understand?

Sending a stealth bomber after him is a big much. I'm not that angry.

It's good that he quit, but make sure you don't relent if he comes crawling back because nobody else will have him.

Wise words.

 

[sdjfoh]

I've overextended myself to accommodate others before but this seems like a waste of your energy and patience. Rip off the band aid and raise the bar…

 

[Chickenwheels]

I asked to borrow it back for one open mic. Only then did he tell me that he'd pawned it many times, and it was in the pawn shop that day.

I gave him the job of booking us gigs.

Wow!