"I don't make up new words or apply new meaning to language when we interact, I use the language I have the most nuanced control over to say what I mean".
That is a distinction not always adhered to in these discussion.
Let’s stick with your definition. There is still this large barrier with the conversation analogy.
Reread your quote out loud, listen to your voice as you do. Look at the text on you screen.
I can take your words and write this.
“Je n'invente pas de nouveaux mots ou n'applique pas de nouveau sens au langage lorsque nous interagissons, j'utilise le langage sur lequel j'ai le contrôle le plus nuancé pour dire ce que je veux dire”.
Read that out loud, listen to your voice as you do. They don’t sound remotely the same right?
Look at the text on your screen; same letters but in different order, a few new accents on some. Doesn’t look the same either.
However, the message, the idea, is exactly the same, and you could even have your name as author of the quote without issue.
Because, language, isn’t about the sounds themselves, or the characters themselves, it’s about the ideas they communicate.
However in Music, the sound itself is the message. Change the sounds, change the message.
Much of art is like that.
Language is not like that.
That’s where it seems the analogy breaks. Other analogies seem more relevant.
Language conversations aren’t about the sounds coming out of our mouths. Music conversations really are about the sounds coming out of the instruments.
(In the 19th century there was a big hullabaloo about Program Music, vs Absolute Music. This century, can we say most agree that instrumental music, especially instrumental jazz, is “Absolute”?)
——
For those interested, here is a tangent:
If I were to go back to university to study music theory, I’d go into the topic of how the music affects the listener at a neurological level. How the brain lights up when listening or performing different music pieces. Over thousands of pieces and listeners, trends will likely emerge.
Eg. Calming, nostalgic yet content feeling : these 32 pieces consistently bring it out over thousands of people. Go through those 32 pieces and find what makes it happen. How are the similar, how are they different. Study, Model. Compose an 33rd piece from the model. Can it bring out those emotions? Does it fail? Alter, repeat…
Start doing that well, and it seems we’re at a music theory that can transcend the specific sounds and get to an emotional meaning beyond the sound itself.
The “plan” could become:
Start:
1. agitated excitement, 2. move to order that calms, 3. happiness, 4. extension of happiness, 5. agitations, 6. loss, 7. sadness of the change, 8. calming return of the happiness in a different form, 9. calming nostalgia, 10. satisfaction of the experience, 11. agitated ending with promise in the future.
End.
All in 4 minutes and 33 seconds.

. (or 7 minutes.. timing could be part of the plan)
Those would be the feelings, and then there would be a musical compositional method to bring those into sound.
That would be something nice.
21st century music compositional theory. ;-)
I think then it would be more fruitful talking about music as conversations, as there would exist a deeper meaning than the sounds themselves. Now, all that is intuitive.
We have prescriptive and descriptive language to discuss the technique of “how to” and “what is”, but we don’t really have the language to describe the “why”, or “what does it mean?”.