Joe Nerve's Bodily Function Warning Thread

[Stumbo]

...I have also have invented a word that I hope to be commonplace one day. When one farts silently, there is no simple way to warn others of what may be to follow.

In the early days of dating my wife, I thought it important to come up with something as to not hurt her, and for reasons I can't remember, "kaaa" was the word we settled on.

Been using it ever since, yet never really tried to spread it, as it works well as a little secret word for us.

Especially in malls and other public places when we know we should be moving along. "KAAA!!! is all that needs to be said, and we quickly shuffle along, leaving others to blame.

SBD (Silent but deadly) is what we use.

Any others?

For farts and other unmentionables?

 

[SBassman]

I call the bathroom nuclear when someone - or me - drops a bad one in there.

 

[ubnomnar]

E.A.V. Alert!!!!!



(Expanding Anal Vapors)

 

[MakiSupaStar]

I call it crop dusting. That's how I get revenge on my students. I just walk along the row spewing my pesticide.

 

[Lady Kayri]

We used to give the warning 'biological warfare alert!' when I was on active duty is the Air Force...

 

[Jinro]

We used to give the warning 'biological warfare alert!' when I was on active duty is the Air Force...

If any of the guys where carrying their gas masks, you should have yelled "GAS GAS GAS"

 

[nortonrider]

fumigate
or
fumigatification

 

[JdoubleH]

Those not benefiting from such a warning experience guffication.

 

[Thor]

WMD

 

[Thor]

Stumbo

Starts a fart thread!
SCHWEET!

 

[JdoubleH]

I call it crop dusting. That's how I get revenge on my students. I just walk along the row spewing my pesticide.

Best not to do it in anger, or you run the risk of a shart (at which point the joke is on you, literally and figuratively).

 

[MakiSupaStar]

Best not to do it in anger, or you run the risk of a shart (at which point the joke is on you, literally and figuratively).

This is true. Crop dusting is an art form. You have too keep things loose enough to not make a sound, but also tight enough to control the seepage so that it can be dispersed evenly. While I haven't had any damage that resulted in sharts, I have had to cough through a couple rough patches.

 

[Stumbo]

Stumbo

Starts a fart thread!
SCHWEET!