3 days in pergertory. didn't go to work - all three. my job allows me to do that, but i don't get paid if i don't go. feel the beginnings of depression slipping in. can't let it happen. tues afternoon rushed a workout in the gym and did something i never did before to my back. tuesday night when i tried to lay down the pain was so bad it knocked the wind out of me. didn't sleep all nite. blew off work wednesday. felt better wednesday nite, but didn't sleep anyhow. noticed earlier that my cat has a hard lump near his rib-cage. obsessed like crazy. aside from the fact of how much i love this guy, my last (unrelated) trip to the vet they wanted $950. had a gig last nite so it was either go to work on no sleep and crap out at the gig, or sleep and have a good gig. i've got my priorities straight. gig more important. adrenaline from last nights show keeps me up till 5am- no work - again. parent's voices sounding off in my head, "when are you going to grow up?", "how about learning some responsibility?", "when are you going to get a real job?". slap myself a coupla times in the head and thankfully they go away. 8:00 am. they're tearing apart the apartment next to me. haven't a clue what they're doing. i hear hammers, saws, drills, sledgehammers, wood being ripped apart - it's freaking relentless. impossible to sleep. too tired to do anything useful, don't want to do anything useful, sick of the tv, sitting in front of the computer......... arrrrgh! i think i'm gonna eat, play bass, eat, play bass, eat, play bass. who am i kidding. i'm gonna eat, waste time on internet, eat, waste time on ineternet, eat, waste time on the internet. oh well.... i've definitely been through worse.... how bout that nader guy.