Need help writing a poem

[GeneralElectric]

I'm not what you call artsy or intelligent so I ask the mighty intellectual giants of TB OT to help me write a poem.

Basically I'm giving a girl a bottle opener. But its not just any bottle opener, its a topless blonde bottle opener mermaid lady. The girl receiving the topless blonde bottle opening mermaid is a tall skinny well endowed blonde girl.

Help me make a poem to correlate the two.

 

[MakiSupaStar]

Write her a haiku

Please, take your top off
With my bottle-opener
Please, take your top off.

 

[GeneralElectric]

You know Maki, after a get a goodish number of responses, I'm going to start a poll.

 

[standupright]

roses are red
violets are blue
i'll ***k you with a rake

 

[MakiSupaStar]

You know Maki, after a get a goodish number of responses, I'm going to start a poll.

Meh, I say your done. Put that on a little tag, and there you go. Trust me. After she uses it a few times top is off. You're in business. End of thread.

 

[WashburnBasser]

Write her a haiku

Please, take your top off
With my bottle-opener
Please, take your top off.

I vote for this one.

 

[MakiSupaStar]

roses are red
violets are blue
i'll ***k you with a rake

LOL. This one, for some reason just had me crying. So funny.

 

[santucci218]

LOL. This one, for some reason just had me crying. So funny.

agreed.

Let me take a shot at this...

The Maid of the Mist
Has never been kissed
By the sailors that chase her all day

But I have class
And A really sweet ass
So open the Chardonna

Your vision will haze
Your mind in A daze
And then I will have my way

 

[crimson_basser]

^^ well played sir

 

[santucci218]

ty, ty.

 

[armywalaby]

+1 for the rake murder.

 

[FL Knifemaker]

This thread reminds me of the Faster Pussycat song "Bathroom Wall"

There once was a girl named Cass
Whose boobies were made of brass
in inclement weather they clanged together
and lightning shot from her.......... Butt

 

[santucci218]

This thread reminds me of the Faster Pussycat song "Bathroom Wall"

There once was a girl named Cass
Whose boobies were made of brass
in inclement weather they clanged together
and lightning shot from her.......... Butt

ASS!

 

[GeneralElectric]

I needz more poetry.

 

[username n/a]

Let me see your *****
I also want to see your ***
You are really ****in hot

 

[santucci218]

delete that before you get in trouble.

 

[username n/a]

delete that before you get in trouble.

Is that better?

 

[fenderphil]

good luck ropin' her

with that bottle opener

 

[Vandelay]

Open a bottle, maybe two.
This bottle opener was made for you.
Because when I held this in my hands
I thought of both you and your glands.

 

[benthughes]

What rhymes with dirty sanchez?