oh yeah groupie for hire.

[Fleegetastic]

Female Seeking to be band groupie

 

[paul_s]

Female Seeking to be band groupie

For when it's inevitably removed:

Female seeking to be band groupie. Just turned 19 and I'm looking to get my ROCK on. Hire me and I will stalk the **** out of your band! Turn up at every gig and make it look like I genuinely adore you.

I promise to wear super tight, revealing clothing and super high heels. I'm also cultured enough to know that you dance to the BASS, so I'm totally going to have to blow the bass player at some point, even though I know they're usually the fat pigs of the band.

Let me manage your Facebook page and Myspace page. I will hit the streets and sing your praises! Even if you look and sound like crap, I will make you look hotter!

If all this sounds good, wait, there's more! I also play the tambourine like a mother****ing riot! I can provide background percussion or whatever you need to fill out your sound.

All this talent doesn't come cheap! $200 a week is my starting rate, and it goes up based upon how bad your band is, or how ugly your bassist is (since I'm going to have to blow him at some point).

My name is Vanessa and I'm ready to work!

Here's my picture so you get an idea of what you are hiring:

 

[TNCreature]

HA HA HA HA!!!

 

[robbotbass]

Link Removedreally looks like this

 

[bassteban]

A girl who looks like that and still has to sell it that hard likely has a penis- not that there's anything inherently wrong w/that.

 

[Bloodhammer]

This is how Brokencyde got to where they are. Only they don't have a bassist, so their rate was probably cheaper!

 

[DeathFromBelow]

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahah!!!

Classic...

 

[SirGrotius]

amazing

 

[lowfreq33]

I'm sure this was posted by either a jilted boyfriend or a jealous girl.

 

[Oneirogenic]

This was posted by a guitarist who caught his girlfriend "servicing" the bassist in his band. GF revenge for sure!

 

[KevInDaBassment]

This was posted by a guitarist who caught his girlfriend "servicing" the bassist in his band. GF revenge for sure!

Oh yeah

Once the ladies sit on one of our cabs while we play...game over

 

[LuckyBassPlayer]

A girl who looks like that and still has to sell it that hard likely has a penis- not that there's anything inherently wrong w/that.

Yes, I DO think that is wrong.:scowl:

 

[M0ses]

There ain't no room for a penis in those pants (at least, not while they're on). I'm going with the angry boyfriend theory.

Tough to blame the bassist who made him angry, though.

 

[JimiLL]

A girl who looks like that and still has to sell it that hard likely has a penis- not that there's anything inherently wrong w/that.

speak for yourself

 

[iammr2]

A girl who looks like that and still has to sell it that hard likely has a penis- not that there's anything inherently wrong w/that.

Lady Gaga???

 

[bassteban]

Clarification: The word *Natural* will very likely occur in any fairly deep purge of my computer. I poke fun at the diff's between various mindsets & outlooks but do NOT mean to attempt to change anyone's attitude one way or the other. I ain't NO better than NO one.

Edit: BTW: I am trying not to, but kinda like- LG sorry

 

[Graham Monette]

I ain't NO better than NO one.

^ So you are better then someone???
English isn't a hard language to learn, perhaps try it some day.

*ANYWAY*
LOL, from Vancouver no less.

$200/week? thats cute.

I find it funny that regardless of influence or genre shes willing to adore whatever music your group plays. All for the piddly sum of $200/week.

I think I'd be a bit interested to see how little money she'd want to switch political parties she'd vote for.

 

[erock0138]

good lord. don't you realize most musicians barely make $200 a week? hahaha.

 

[bassistjoe93]

Hahaha hilarious!

 

[lowfreq33]

$200 a week, that's $50 each split 4 ways, $40 each split 5 ways. I guess it depends on how many hours a week she wants to work.