Quiting by email, text, IM ....

[Jokei]

You've done your best, given notice and offered to play current commitments - you've been very reasonable.

Getting fired by email or firing someone that way is not good form, but may be the only option now and then. Good luck.

 

[1bassleft]

The worst firing/quitting is not telling about/turning up to practice. Over the weeks, the penny starts to drop, then the awkward, chance encounter in the street/pub/supermarket. Ugh, and that seems to have been the norm IME.

What OP did sounds civil. Always the chance for a "Anything we did/can do? No? OK, best of luck and thanks" conversation after.

 

[yodedude2]

Who wants to make a unneeded trip to hear this stuff. Clean and quick, if the decision is already made why have a discussion.

you are focusing solely on what you are comfortable with, but the proper protocol would be: are they comfortable with it?

if they are cool with getting the news from you that way, then good. if they are resentful, then bad.

 

[QORC]

I don't think you did the wrong thing. You tried to reach them all simultaneously. I quit my last band in similar fashion. And yes, I didn't want to drag it out any longer and there was no rehearsal in site. so a well-thought out email. Seems like no harm was done.

 

[40Hz]

I prefer to be told in person or by phone. But I think the real bottom line is: use whatever gets the job done with the least amount of drama. If that’s an email then so be it.

 

[buldog5151bass]

I totally get where you are coming from, but for me, being in a band is a hobby. So its nowhere near a career type job...more like part time at mcdonalds. =)

For almost everyone here, it is. But unlike a job at McDonalds, people have an investment in the project. They can't just grab the next minimum wage untrained applicant off the street and plug them in. Maybe I'm just old, but I think that's taking the easy way out, and avoiding a confrontation.

Put it this way - would you want someone quitting your band like that?

 

[matthewbrown]

The main thing, I think, is being given adequate notice. If you're being replaced, you should get the standard two weeks at least.

 

[Liam Wald]

This may seem archaic but do they have telephones?
I know that talking to people isn't very fashionable but if all else fails...

 

[john_g]

For almost everyone here, it is. But unlike a job at McDonalds, people have an investment in the project. They can't just grab the next minimum wage untrained applicant off the street and plug them in. Maybe I'm just old, but I think that's taking the easy way out, and avoiding a confrontation.

Put it this way - would you want someone quitting your band like that?

I would want them to quit however they see fit quite frankly. Yes having someone quit stinks, but its not at the level of a job for me. I would be more ticked off if I packed up all my stuff, arranged my schedule, drove to the practice spot only to find out someone is quitting. I would rather they called, emailed, or texts. Its just one of those things where everyone is going to have a different opinion.

 

[PauFerro]

I'm thinking it sucks for all, no matter what the choice of medium is...

I hate to say it, but sometimes your're better off when certain people quit. Ever lose a job and then find you're earning more money somewhere else? That's happened to me before.

 

[Spidey2112]

I hate to say it, but sometimes your're better off when certain people quit. Ever lose a job and then find you're earning more money somewhere else? That's happened to me before.

One door closes, and one hopefully opens... Tell'em what's behind Door #3, Johnny!

 

[DrayMiles]

Being professional is essential, even if others are not. And in my experience, musicians aren’t pillars of moral behavior at the best of times.
You should behave according to the circumstances. IMO, you know what is right but people are complex creatures. Artistic peeps are even more complicated.

 

[Siggy]

I would talk in person or telephone. It's too easy to misconstrue intent with the written word.

 

[JRA]

I didn't want to tell him to his face,

......

 

[john_g]

I would talk in person or telephone. It's too easy to misconstrue intent with the written word.

"Welcome to basslessville...population...you". How could that be misconstrued?

 

[JakobT]

I think email is actually OK when firing someone. It allows both sides to save face. It’s also good to have something in writing in case of disagreement.

 

[Eric Swaim]

Two weeks ago I text the band I have been playing bass for (2.5 years) and stated I was leaving the band, we had not played since Halloween and had no gigs scheduled. It was the best time to leave. We are all friends still. I just wanted to focus more on another band I play with.

 

[Joebarnes]

For me personally, I prefer to "put on my big boy pants" and do things face to face. When I changed careers after 15 years, I drove out to my boss's location and looked her and the Vice President in the face and explained why when I passed over my resignation letter. I have also had to fire people before; again, was always face to face.

Any time I have quit a band I have been in for a length of time, I have done it face to face. But, honestly, that is just how I'm wired - I see a group email / facebook post as a bit of a cop-out - Are you afraid to stand behind your decision? That being said, I have had many people quit bands I have been in via FB message or email, and I still talk to most of them.

There is nothing wrong with quitting via electronic means; its just the least personal/respectful way to do it in my mind.

 

[hrodbert696]

Yes, it very much depends on the nature of the band and the relationships. The longer the group has been together and the closer people are to each other, the more important it is to have the conversation face to face. But bands can be fragile and ephemeral things and it isn't always necessary. For instance, there was a group I was thinking of leaving (and that probably would have disbanded without me, since I was BL), and was planning to have the talk at a rehearsal after we had taken a hiatus. Then the guitarist goes and quits by email before that happens. The others were an hour or more away from me, so at that point my hand is kind of forced; it wouldn't make sense to make a long drive all the way over to see them just to say we're done. So I emailed that I was out too, and that was that.

 

[Fiset]

I've quit several bands by email, including bands where I've known the guys a long time. The emails didn't say "I'm quitting by this electronic format and we will never have another face-to-face conversation about it" - rather they were just a way to immediately communicate the message to the entire band at the same time. I see zero problem with that, in pretty much any band situation. If someone ever felt disrespected by receiving such an email (as opposed to a phone call or a face-to-face meeting), thats on them.

I've never been fired from a band but if I was to receive an email or text letting me go, the delivery method of the message would the least of the things I let bother me.