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[Rant] Drummers

Why is it that a good drummer is so hard to find? My band, which has been on TV before, which has played half time shows in hockey stadiums and has played mid-size towns' event centers, has this issue with drummers.

Drummer One:
Flashy. Acted like drums were a lead instrument. On top of that, he had huge family problems, so he was pre-occupied. Didn't make it to the first gig.

Drummer Two:
Good guy. Unfortunately, a drunk, a pothead, a womanizer, a smoker, a bit of a dick, and he has the kind of attitude that says "**** you guys, I'd trade you up for the next best thing." And he had a hard time keeping a beat.

Drummer Three:
See drummer two, add insanity.

What is it with a good drummer being so hard to find? Is 80s-inspired Rock n' Roll so boring or hard to play? I swear finding a good drummer around here is like trying to find a pearl necklace underground...In the Amazon rainforest.
 
Sounds suspiciously like the first 3 drummers we had. Now we're on #4. He's an awesome drummer but it took 3 years and untold pain and frustration to find him. Good drummer are rare around here too. Usually you get one with a huge ego, huge issues, and a huge lack of the ability to keep good time.