What you need is solitude. When you look into the void just beyond the wall of sleep you'll realize that you're not just another back street kid. The wicked world we live in is a symptom of the universe as a whole. Bassically, don't go killing yourself to live like a national acrobat. While you may feel like you're just swinging the chain like a megalomaniac caught in the wheels of confusion, what you really need might be a good old straightener. While you're asking yourself 'Am I going Insane?' the revelation will hit you like a shockwave. Have you ever considered studying to be a spiral architect?