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Throwing in the towel tonight....

Volunteerk9

Volunteerk9

Oct 20, 2015
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#1
Ive been playing in a cover band for about a year and a half and tonights gig will be my last with them. We are all middle aged guys with full time careers never meant to be anything but fun but it has turned into nothing but headache and heartburn for me. Our set list consists of some of the most obscure, dance floor clearing songs intermingled with a few popular but played to death 70's tunes that the BL/singer chooses. Anything new that might be proposed is either shot down immediately or we'll get the 'I've not had a chance to look at it yet' statement. I never discussed payment (which is my fault) in the beginning - gig money was said to being placed in the proverbial band fund for hypothetical, future gear purposes. You guys can pretty much figure out where this is going without me expanding into great detail. Money disappears, couple of guys are mysteriously showing up with new gear etc...Money aside, I get the set list for tonights gig and 2 songs show up that we've never even played. Never. Not once. 2 songs off a B side album from the 70's. I was told to just wing it, the crowd won't know. I'm not the best bass player by any stretch but I do want to be able to play my best in front of a crowd, not just wing it. I'm leaving out other issues which over time has really crawled under my skin but I'll spare you those.

So Ive wasted enough of your time - just had to say something before my head explodes. Thanks for the vent.
 
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#4
Volunteerk9 said:
I'm leaving out other issues which over time has really crawled under my skin but I'll spare you those.

So Ive wasted enough of your time - just had to say something before my head explodes. Thanks for the vent.
Click to expand...

Don't stop. You don't have to spare us anything. We don't know those guys and probably never will. It's all just reading entertainment for us and a reminder of just how bad it can be out there.

I applaud your tolerance for enduring that for a year and a half. I doubt I would have made it a day and a half after the first incident.
 
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#5
Nev375 said:
Don't stop. You don't have to spare us anything. We don't know those guys and probably never will. It's all just reading entertainment for us and a reminder of just how bad it can be out there.

I applaud your tolerance for enduring that for a year and a half. I doubt I would have made it a day and a half after the first incident.
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Three of us have all played in bands before, nothing big just the local bar scene. Drummer and BL have not. Drummer did audition for a couple bands and was verbally abused for lack of skill on his last attempt before us. BL and drummer have naturally 'teamed up' so to speak - my .02 is that they know they have nothing else. Drummer's wife is a Yoko of the purest form. She attempts to run the PA but has no clue how to do so. The worst part is, she wont admit that she has no clue just snaps at everyone when we mention adjustments. One of my really close friends was a stage manager for a really popular 80's hair metal band up until a couple of years ago and he came to one of our shows. When he saw the sound was struggling he politely asked Yoko if she needed any help. She embarrasingly snapped his head off too. Same gig, drummers son worked the door - the band paid him I found out later. (I wasnt paid) . Same gig, me and the wife paid our tab to leave, only to find out the BL and his group of about 10 wined and dined on the bands cover charge. If I tell any more, its only going to convince me how big of an idiot Ive been this long. Lol
 
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#7
I don't think I would have tolerated the finance issues for so long. I could understand if everyone's in it for fun and no one is making anything but not for one second would I be subsidising gear and beer for them and walking away out of pocket.

Before you tell them you're walking I'd ask for your share of the band fund just to watch him squirm and pull out his bs excuses. It'll make walking away even easier.

You sound like a patient easy going guy and they don;t sound worthy of your time or effort, hopefully you'll find something better in no time!

Good luck fella :)
 
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#8
1. Resign with dignity and professionalism. Give notice, offer to cover a couple of gigs on the books.

2. Maintain your standards. I like them.

3. Find some musicians who share your standards and discuss these issues before hitching your wagon to them. You're an audience-centered musician. I call those types "entertainers." Find some entertainers next time. They're out there, you may have to look a little longer and harder, but it's worth it.

Good luck.
 
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#19
Wise choice my man .. Write some stuff and record it at home ... DAWs are great these days and easily obtainable ... it's great fun to play your stuff for friends .. Send it to their phones etc
 
#20
Set list please! I'd like to see if there are any to call out when we go overtime and need to thin the crowd out.

Everything else you've mentioned most of us have seen at least once depending on our hard-headedness.
The "Yoko" thing(defined as wife or girlfriend having major involvement that is detrimental to the group) is very hard to tolerate.
 

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