To Lean In, Or Walk Away?

[MichelD]

I quit playing in cover music bar bands years ago.

Call it artistic snobbery if you like, but I'm retired and I don't need to nor have time to play the same old recognizeable cover songs I don't like in poopy venues.

I currently play in two acoustic groups with my upright, a group 70+ guys (I'm the kid at 68) who enjoy playing vintage jazz and blues tunes in a park in the summer and a new Cajun-style band that might eventually play the odd venue where our friends in other bands play vintage honky tonk, country and rockabilly type music. You can call that "cover band" music too if you want, but it's played for the love of the genre and the music, whether there is money in it or not.

 

[JW56789]

The responsibility and all the leg work gets old, and the pressure of trying to make originals fly in the settings where you can play makes the hill a little steeper to boot. And good on you for your concern for the other guys.

In light of that, I'd simply lay my cards on the table and speak from your heart, giving them the longest possible time to make other arrangements as you click off the remaining dates. That's the best thing you can do for them and your own conscience, and you don't have the added burden of 'they don't know what's coming' hanging over you.

If things are anything like they were when I gigged, a former band leader usually doesn't have a lot of problems finding a gig where you can just be one of the boys in the band.

Good Luck,

JW

 

[kevindahl]

Some great advice here already. I'm not you but based on your post I would be taking a break. I have done this in the past and it has certainly improved my motivation.

All the best in whatever decision you make.

 

[lfmn16]

Despite the TB “collective wisdom” every song you play doesn’t have to be a number one hit played note for note perfect. I’ve played in several band that played covers and 2-3 originals each set. Just make sure the covers are popular and play them close to the original. It’s the best of both worlds.

 

[brianrost]

You can call that "cover band" music too if you want, but it's played for the love of the genre and the music, whether there is money in it or not.

Once you get away from post Beatles pop music, the idea of covers doesn't really exist.

 

[HardNHeavy]

any way to break up all your chores as BL with the other members?.. Maybe a different place to rehears once in a while, let someone else book a gig etc. But ya'll need to talk and hash it out before you cancel shows imo. Original songs are rough at some of these venues unless your well known or have a decent following IME. so maybe just take a break and spread out the responsibilities if they're willing.

 

[PennyroyalWe]

Thanks for the input, all.

For some more context, we do play mixed originals and covers for the shows we play that aren’t 45 min showcase sets.
We have 2 shows booked for the next two months, one showcase and one all nighter.

The big chunk of info I left out is that I currently also play bass in one a band that’s playing mixed originals and covers for dinner crowds (totally different genre from the other band). I also have two former band mates who are wanting to start up projects and have asked me to play bass for those. If I did them all, that would be 4 groups, plus my full time day job & family. There’s no way I can do them all.

Out of all of the bands, the one I’m most willing to give up is “my” band, for the reasons previously stated. At least two members of “my” band would also be a part of one of these new projects.

I’m not so foolish as to count my chickens before they hatch, as these two new projects may never actually take off. They are, nevertheless, part of the things weighing on my mind with this decision.

I think a sit down with the band is a good idea, I just wish I had something more to tell them beyond “I’m feeling burnt out, and I’d like to take a hiatus for the summer or beyond.” Then again, for all I know they’re feeling the same way.

 

[Slough Feg Bass]

Just don't book any gigs, and the band will dissolve on it's own.
But really, I stopped playing in 10 bands at once years ago, it was just too much time commitments, so I started ONE cover band that I LOVE, and stayed in my long term originals band. Of course now I have a third band, but it is super once in a while, so not much time needed. Evaluate what you want to do with your time, and do what you need to do to make those things happen.

 

[MultiScaleMale]

If you play guitar and sing, do the fool on a stool thing for a relatively easy $300-400 a night.

 

[MrLenny1]

Walk away. It's a poopy business and there is always
bands breaking up & key players dropping out. It's
part of the BIZ. Like others said don't burn bridges.
You can still play with your band in other areas.

 

[bassicmike]

Cover band issues are predictable things like:
people not learning the songs correctly but insisting they are right,
people forgetting the arrangement/song forms,
people not learning on their own time and relying on rehearsal time to learn,
people not being able to play as well as you wish they would,
people playing too loudly or the opposite,
people who bring in needless drama,
schedules not lining up for anyone to rehearse as needed,
bandleaders wanting too much of your time to rehearse when you already know your stuff,

Are you in my band?

 

[LBS-bass]

Are you in my band?

LOL

 

[SixtyCycleHum]

My dude. If you're the one doing all the hustle for promo and booking and calling all the shots, it's little wonder that you're burning out. Can you delegate some of the roles around so it feels more like a team and less pressing for you?

You also said that you miss just being the bass player. Every single member of TB gets that, haha. Look, it's hard, but can you play bass and sing? Would/can that be a possibility if you just swap out with the current bass man? A good 90% of bassists are also competent guitar players, in my experience.

Other than that, it really does seem like your heart ain't in this one anymore. I'm just trying to troubleshoot so you can maybe find your mojo again.

 

[pepj]

All band work should be paid but you should enjoy doing it too. If you don't, how will that come across.
But you also need to have a value to the venue to make them need to book you.
If its not working why do it.
Maybe you'll re evaluate after a break.

 

[dbsfgyd1]

For the past 5 years or so I’ve been in a band where I’m the singer/ songwriter & rhythm guitarist, and de facto BL as well. We’ve mostly been an originals band, with some scattered covers mixed in. We have primary played showcase type shows at local bar venues.

We have recently played our first few shows since covid, and it was kind of a reminder about all the things that suck about playing these shows:
Having to do all the promo and leg work, loading all the gear in at 7:30 to not play until 11:00, there being little to no crowd, and get literally $0 at the end of the night. Last time we got somewhat chewed out by the venue for not bringing enough people through the door.

In light of this, we’ve been shifting direction to learn more covers and change to playing 2-3 hour bar shows. Ones where we know beforehand what we’ll be getting paid. We’ve had a long list of cover songs that we all mostly know from picking them up over the years of playing, so it’s mostly just ironing out the parts and getting them tight.

Issue is, I’m just not feeling the motivation anymore. The band feels like more of a chore that takes up my time and house (we practice at my place) one evening a week, rather than something I look forward to like I used to. I’m at the point where I am seriously considering not booking anymore gigs (I am the only one who does any of the booking hustle) and pulling the plug on the band after we play the gigs we have committed to.

I feel bad because my band mates have put in time and effort into the band, and they seem to really enjoy the hang and music, and seem excited about adding some pay to that equation. I just feel like if I continue with it, it would be solely for their sake, because I’m pretty burnt out.

I miss just being the bassist in a band.

Anyone been in a similar situation? What would you recommend? Should I wait and the motivation will return? Should I lean in to the challenge, or break up now before this feeling turns even more negative? Is there a good way to dissolve a band that doesn’t burn bridges?

I can’t help you much. I’m just a bassist in a band…. I don’t think I’ve ever been burnt out on a musical project. If I was running the business side (and I have had several of my own businesses) I can understand it.

How about if you all take a month or so off and see if the batteries don’t recharge? Somehow, I don’t think it’s the material that’s wearing on you. JMO.

 

[Outbush]

I wouldn’t ditch the band. Firstly they obviously like you (and it really sounds like they’re good mates of yours too) your music and you would create the music if it wasn’t a passion for you.

What can you do to change the feeling of “chore”.

Ditch the early load-in gig for starters (we all hate them - every muso everywhere).

Take that covers gig and weave in some of your originals - be aware of matching energy and intensity of the songs naturally.

if you haven’t yet, do some recording to re-explore what you’ve been doing together.

Once you’re doing some $$ I’m a gig get the guys to give you a hand with gear etc & skill them up.

what can you do to maximise “the hang” at gigs because that sounds really cool and important to everyone? Setup and sound check then (venue pays for) dinner; recording session then BBQ with the families in the twilight? Etc etc…

These would’ve things that I would try to do and not sort of right for you, obviously, but TB is saying smart stuff again and it is all worth thinking about.

I guess what I’m saying is the same as many others, a) don’t loose what you’ve got, and b) reimagine what it could be.

 

[Geogio]

Sounds like a Composers hiatus is in order. Sometimes it's a real loop.
I'm not for certain but it seems that there's an undue pressure out there because not that many people seem to play instruments anymore, they all switched to computer games and smartphone nonsense.

In and out of bands or musical situations didn't used to be too big of a deal. What was difficult was hanging on to a good drummer.

 

[Titch]

I've been in a similar situation with 2 bands.
Lots of work, no reward, no punters, no money.. we even had to pay a venue for lack of crowd...
Take a break from it all.
You are over worked and underpaid.
You don't have to dissolve the band just take time out.

here's another option:
Instead of doing the pubs and clubs, try some parties

 

[rocu]

I didn’t read the whole thread, sorry if this has been said.

It’s okay to ask the other band members to take over the booking and other chores from you. I did it in my bands and it’s kept me playing with them. If no one steps up then you’ll know it’s time to leave.

You just have to be okay with rolling with however they handle it. If you won’t be happy with the way someone else handles things this is not the answer for you.

 

[db59]

If you have people who are willing to play YOUR music, and do it happily, please take that into strong consideration. That doesn't come easily unless you can afford to pay people.

+++++Good advice!!!!