Two bassists may be one too many

[Mo cowbell]

Opinions please....

I started in a band a couple years ago. Me on bass, a dude on guitar and his wife as singer. Another guitar and a drummer. Material includes Metallica, Soundgarden, Petty, Alice In Chains, Hendrix,,etc.... also originals....you get the idea. We played one gig during this time as rehearsal time is difficult and we replaced a drummer recently. Here's where it gets weird. A couple years ago when our pratctices were spread out by over a month each, the wife of the guitarist decided she should learn bass and start a girl band project. Well, that didn't go and so she started filling in when I couldn't make it. That's also how she writes her songs. Anyway, my conclusion is that while she likes to play bass, I am a bass player. I play the parts of the song she plays what she can. Much of the time I can't distinctly hear my part and its muddy.

Today I texted the main guitarist that perhaps we could decide on having me play the more difficult tunes and she could play on the easy ones. To me, the sound isn't crisp and tight it is muddy to have us both playing....even if improvise other parts that stay out of her way. Anyway, he said he didn't think that would work because she likes playing bass.

I think the band is cool and I have a bit of fun playing but think if they are ok with how she plays and are satisfied with her bass playing its time for me to bail.

 

[Killed_by_Death]

Don't forget to call her Yoko on your way out. It's coming.

 

[Jeff Elkins]

So wait. She was filling in when you couldn't make it, but now she also plays when you DO make it?

 

[petrus61]

Have some self respect and exit the situation. If your basic human instincts aren't telling you what's going on, it's time for some deep reflection and self evaluation. Don't be a chump.

 

[Jeff Elkins]

I'm with KBD: She likes playing bass. He likes her. Your days are numbered. You may be right about bailing.

How many gigs in how many years, though? If the band isn't serious enough to work much after a couple of years, what are you missing out on if you leave? Or stay?

Look for another project. Meanwhile, offer to spend part of practice working with her on the tough stuff if you like these guys. But they really should level with you.

 

[Thrillhouse]

You should probably just make it clear how you feel to them but given the situation, it doesn't seem likely they will listen. Maybe start looking into some other opportunities and leave once you've found something else. No reason you can't go on some auditions on the side.

 

[RoadRanger]

Run!

 

[5544]

No matter how you put it, the band is going to side with the singer only because they are harder to replace.
No matter how you put it, the man is going to stick up for his girlfriend / wife even if she is in the wrong.
No matter how you put it, you are just the bass player and can be replaced by a singing girl who happens to be sleeping with the guitarist.

 

[Stumbo]

She's rehearsing, live, with your band.

Since she plays along with you on stage, I think they are hoping you stay around long enough so she can learn enough to take over. IMO they have no respect for you and your bass playing even though you founded the band. In addition, they want you to quit so you give up rights to the originals.

I think you needed to take a stand the first time she showed up at practice/on stage with a bass and an amp. IMO, That's a valid excuse for stage rage.

Good luck.

 

[charlie monroe]

She's rehearsing, live, with your band.

Since she plays along with you on stage, I think they are hoping you stay around long enough so she can learn enough to take over. IMO they have no respect for you and your bass playing even though you founded the band. In addition, they want you to quit so you give up rights to the originals.

I think you needed to take a stand the first time she showed up on stage with a bass and an amp. IMO, That's a valid excuse for stage rage.

Good luck.

What's this 'on stage' stuff you're talking about?

They've played one gig in the several years they've been together. One.

 

[Element Zero]

What do basket balls, tennis balls, ping pong balls, and raquet balls all have in common?

 

[5544]

She's rehearsing, live, with your band.

Since she plays along with you on stage, I think they are hoping you stay around long enough so she can learn enough to take over. IMO they have no respect for you and your bass playing even though you founded the band. In addition, they want you to quit so you give up rights to the originals.

I think you needed to take a stand the first time she showed up on stage with a bass and an amp. IMO, That's a valid excuse for stage rage.

Good luck.

I think the first time she shows to practice with a bass and amp take it as your last day.

 

[hrodbert696]

A year or two ago, I auditioned for a husband/wife couple who said they were starting a blues band and had a bunch of original material. We were all set, they sent me all their originals, I had some time traveling so there was going to be a gap of a few weeks between the audition and when we started rehearsing. Meanwhile I drilled all their stuff and learned it, probably not stone cold perfect but pretty close. I get back from my trip and promptly start messaging the guitarist/husband to ask when we start rehearsing, I'm ready to go. He puts me off and says he'll get back to me... and hold on, there's a conflict with the drummer... etc. etc. Weeks go by and I keep drilling the material, really eager to get this project started. After a month or so of this he writes me to say thanks but they decided not to do that project after all.

In the meantime I had friended both of them on Facebook. About a week after that message the wife/singer posts that she's excited to start learning bass.

 

[Jeff Elkins]

A year or two ago, I auditioned for a husband/wife couple who said they were starting a blues band and had a bunch of original material. We were all set, they sent me all their originals, I had some time traveling so there was going to be a gap of a few weeks between the audition and when we started rehearsing. Meanwhile I drilled all their stuff and learned it, probably not stone cold perfect but pretty close. I get back from my trip and promptly start messaging the guitarist/husband to ask when we start rehearsing, I'm ready to go. He puts me off and says he'll get back to me... and hold on, there's a conflict with the drummer... etc. etc. Weeks go by and I keep drilling the material, really eager to get this project started. After a month or so of this he writes me to say thanks but they decided not to do that project after all.

In the meantime I had friended both of them on Facebook. About a week after that message the wife/singer posts that she's excited to start learning bass.

 

[SteveC]

Leave. Get out. Don't look back. But do it with class. Never burn a bridge, even if it's this bridge.
I think/hope you already knew the answer.
I can't think of a band that worked with 2 bass players. 2 drummers maybe. 2 guitar players for sure.
Hey, maybe ask her guitar player husband if you can play guitar on some tunes, or the harder ones. Nah, that would be a dick move. Leave on good terms.

 

[Mo cowbell]

I'll try to sum up a few of the items from above.

.....I didn't form the band. Forgive me if I said or implied that. As for the originals, I just have my style in them while they wrote them. I try to add runs and "cool" stuff verses quarter notes following guitar chords.

......Yes, one gig in a little over two years. They are trying to get gigs more seriously now. The former drummers unreliability put a huge damper on efforts before due to unreliability. But like you said, maybe I'm not missing much. The thing is, I love playing a few of the originals and have creative involvement in them....of which I receive little recognition...

......I do like the whole band and consider them friends. I like the thought of helping the other person who plays bass to learn the more complex parts but she isn't really a bass player. She plays bass.... there is a difference in that there is a feel that isn't there yet due to inexperience. She isn't comfortable playing Man In the Box correctly while singing at this stage. And there's part of the problem for me. I play the correct rhythm and notes but they're hard to hear with the low E and octave E being played off rythem.

......and yes, I have a problem with being too loyal. Maybe in this case I am a chump. That sucks.

.......yes, I basically have my answer before I posted but thought this would make an interesting thread and maybe give me other thoughts (like helping her learn the parts before I go). As far as other bands having 2 basses....I was hoping I could help evolve it to where it might be cool. Thing is, I'm not Billy Sheehan. I play the covers like the album. No need for two people to do that. On the gig we did have, the sound guy was super confused as to what was going on. I told him she played bass and I was the bass player. Turn me up in mix and she can hear herself through her amp.

......I just got up....what does they're all round have to do with this? : )

 

[charlie monroe]

they're all round

True, they are all round.

They also bounce, and so should you.

 

[40Hz]

It's an old story. And it looks like you're about to become a part of it:
****

The Camel's Nose In The Tent.

One cold night, as an Arab sat in his tent, a camel gently thrust his nose under the flap and looked in. "Master," he said, "let me put my nose in your tent. It's cold and stormy out here." "By all means," said the Arab, "and welcome" as he turned over and went to sleep.

A little later the Arab awoke to find that the camel had not only put his nose in the tent but his head and neck also. The camel, who had been turning his head from side to side, said, "I will take but little more room if I place my forelegs within the tent. It is difficult standing out here." "Yes, you may put your forelegs within," said the Arab, moving a little to make room, for the tent was small.

Finally, the camel said, "May I not stand wholly inside? I keep the tent open by standing as I do." "Yes, yes," said the Arab. "Come wholly inside. Perhaps it will be better for both of us." So the camel crowded in. The Arab with difficulty in the crowded quarters again went to sleep. When he woke up the next time, he was outside in the cold and the camel had the tent to himself.

 

[morgan138]

If you're all on board to commit to writing your own music for two bass players, one of whom is new to the instrument, go for it! But this situation obviously isn't going to work for a cover band where you play regular one-bass songs (because you'd need to have both bassists on top of their game to make that not sound like a mess, and even then it might not be possible)!

And having a second bass pop in on every third song, or a second fake bass that's turned way down...that stuff won't work in a live setting. Even if the engineer's willing to cheerfully do the extra work involved, it'll sound weird at best. And if the engineer doesn't feel like playing along, it'll sound terrible.

 

[Pirate Captain]

True, they are all round.

They also bounce, and so should you.

...provided you've got the...oh, nevermind