• TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
    Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
    Join free Log in
    Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.

...was it something I said?

#41
SlingBass4 said:
I'd probably have ignored it, as well. I find it sad that some folks don't have the gonads to tell someone that they're leaving in person......or at very least - by phone. In this world of texting, voice mail, email, etc., proper civilized communication has gone the way of the Dodo (which pretty much sums up this thread) :rollno:
Click to expand...


I agree to a certain extent... but

I wouldn't go as far as to say E-mail is a poor choice of communication. It's not much different than sending a letter was 100 years ago.

Texting over the phone? Voice-mail? Not very civilized communication, especially for something like leaving a band. But E-mail is perfectly okay.

When it comes to communication, I find it comes down to the person more so than the medium. A flake is a flake, whether in person, over the phone, or typing an e-mail. Some people just suck at communicating their thoughts/ideas.
 
#43
ChrisB2 said:
You're fine quitting via email. And personally, I'd prefer they NOT reply if I'm done and not looking to maintain any relationships. It's just cleaner. What's there to say? To discuss? Who cares? It's over, move along people.

Oh, and by the way, hernameisrio is a "she." Her name is rio... ;)
Click to expand...


OH, that's funny, hadn't noticed when I first responded. You got the typical male v male (non) response. Don't expect him to resolve things like you do, all business aside. My BL asked me, likely ONLY BECAUSE HIS WIFE pressed him to, as she is also in the band, and I've known her 30 years+ (and I cc'd her with the original nice letter), otherwise, I would have easily expected the same (non) response.


Its done. Forget it. Move on. You did all you could do. Ignore all rumors. Its not personal, its just the way we men sometimes are, not all men, but many.
 
#44
Sorry guys, I went to Florida for a weekend and missed out a bit. AND, YES. I DANCED ON THE SAND! YAY! :D

Hmm...

1. I am indeed a woman and that is indeed one of my favorite bass lines (and favorite band, and favorite bassist). :D I will now Photoshop my girly bits onto John Taylor in order to prove this. Just kidding.

2. To provide an amusing contrast to how things COULD have gone, I responded to the punk band's polite email in which they let me go, with this: "Man, **** you guys! Ha ha, just kidding. Well, that's okay, I understand. Hopefully we can still keep in touch and hang out." See? I might curse like a sailor, but I won't bite. We are all still friends. Yaaaay.

3. Nev375, I get what you're saying about my reasons creating sort of a foot-in-mouth situation...I didn't think of it that way and as somebody who constantly feels compelled explain and defend myself, it's a good insight to have.

4. As for how men are, I'm slowly learning this for myself and I hate gender stereotypes, but it is something I've noticed...honestly, given the catty behavior which is unfortunately engrained [by society] into many women as they grow up, it's kind of a relief to be part of the "boys' club" to a degree and to not have to endure any verbal mud-slinging. My ex-boyfriend is a tragic exception to this, heh heh heh, but in general, it's a breath of fresh air for me to be able to just SAY SOMETHING and not feel like I have to provide a thesis statement. Now that I think about it, I'm glad Steve The Jerk (TM) didn't bother to respond. It's not like I needed to hear, "Noooo! Please don't go!" or whatever. I just found it to be a little rude. I was socialized to respond to peoples' communications. My parents would get on my case if I didn't call friends back or answer questions in school. So when people blow me off, I'm always kinda taken aback.

5. I will play it if I have to, but I really, really hate "Brown-Eyed Girl." (NO! THEY'RE HAZEL!)

6. I missed you guys! <3
 
#46
Well, I couldn't find any passenger pigeons and nobody knew what I was talking about when I said I wanted to send a telegram. Uh, so, yeah. Are we not all sitting on the Internet having a perfectly civil discussion (well, sort of) right now? I would venture to say that the Internet is today's equivalent of, as someone else stated already, writing a letter. Or a telegram, or whatever.

So, yeah. In my world, and in the worlds of many other people who enjoy the perks of living in 2012, email is just fine. I mean, come on. How does everyone at, say, an OFFICE JOB communicate? Through email! At least that's what I've been told...I've never worked at an office, but you get the idea. ;)
 
#47
Several years ago, I advised a friend to quit a band because the drummer was so unreliable. He wouldn't show up for practice, obviously had other priorities, and was as slow as Christmas when it came to almost anything that was band-related. His lethargy was simply inexcusable. However, when my friend did quit in person, the drummer went so berserk that eventually they had to call the police. Quitting in person may sound good in theory, but you can't be guaranteed of a positive outcome.
 
#48
hernameisrio said:
I was socialized to respond to peoples' communications. My parents would get on my case if I didn't call friends back or answer questions in school. So when people blow me off, I'm always kinda taken aback.
Click to expand...

I used to be that way as well. But after a while I got used to it, and just move on. I like to work with people on a repeat basis, so if they can't communicate with me, then I don't see too much of a future.
 

Latest posts

Top Bottom
Back