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What is a Reasonable Text Response Time-Frame? Might be time for a new drummer:)

Discussion in 'Band Management [BG]' started by CoffeeLove, Oct 20, 2020.

  1. 4 hours

    29 vote(s)
  2. 8 hours

    25 vote(s)
  3. 12 hours

    15 vote(s)
  4. 24 hours

    87 vote(s)
  5. 48 hours

    18 vote(s)
  6. People should be able to respond whenever they want, being organized is stupid & controlling:)

    6 vote(s)
  7. Cheesecake

    10 vote(s)
  1. CoffeeLove

    CoffeeLove Supporting Member

    One of my drummers does not respond consistently to questions via text message or voice mail. That is, when trying to schedule a band practice or determining if he is available for a particular gig, he might only respond to 1 out of 3 messages. Or, it requires several messages sent to him over a few days to get an answer. YES, I have asked him to try and be more responsive if the text relates to band logistics. I get that people view texting differently, but this is our primary form of communication. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt, but it is hard to see a good rationale for the lack of response. He does not have a job and is not currently gigging due to Covid, so not seeing the logic here. I have other people that could take his spot, so might be moving on.

    In my mind, 24 hours seems to be a reasonable time to wait for a response.

    Just wondering where others stand on this one, especially if you are the BL or one that organizes everything.

    Last edited: Oct 20, 2020
    kevindahl and musicman7722 like this.
  2. thabassmon


    Sep 26, 2013
    New Zealand
    As a person who doesn't really like this texty, facebooky, instant message stuff, I can sometimes take a week to respond to a text. Most of the time I'll text back straight away but if there are more than a couple of texts from the same person or if the questions are inane, I'll get tired of it and stop.
    The longest I've gone and still responded is three months. Facebook messenger annoys me even quicker.
    I voted 48hours because some people just aren't into it.
    Even when I am the BL I'll make the text short and informative. Not in for long text tag.
  3. Oddly


    Jan 17, 2014
    Dublin, Ireland.
    I voted 24, and if it"s important that I get a response within that, I include that in the text.
    Have you asked the guy if he'd prefer some other way to communicate...maybe Whatsapp?
    Maybe he's on a phone plan that doesn't include free texts?
  4. crguti


    Feb 14, 2011
    usually happen when the question is buried within a lot of cr@p.
    Phud, Downunderwonder, mcnach and 7 others like this.
  5. Phaenomenal


    Jun 12, 2020
    New York
    Speaking as someone who refuses to be shackled to her phone, I would suggest asking your drummer how he prefers to be contacted.
    I have different methods of being contacted for various people and nearly all of them had to have boundaries set. How quickly or if I respond depends on the importance to me, but most somewhere between a few minutes to a couple hours (or the next morning for the overnight messages).
    Some of my contacts are bad about responding to text and VM but I just roll with it. I can't change them. I know them well enough to know they got it and what needs to happen will happen and if it can't they will reach out to me.
  6. buldog5151bass

    buldog5151bass Kibble, milkbones, and P Basses. And redheads.

    Oct 22, 2003
    I think 24 hours - not every person has their phone surgically attached.

    I would have a talk with him. Unless he has a VERY good excuse, one more mess up and he is gone.
    CoffeeLove likes this.
  7. DirtDog


    Jun 7, 2002
    The Deep North
    Honestly, if someone is going to be in a collaborative enterprise like a band, they had better get onboard with the dominant form of communication quickly or simply get left behind. If I’m in a band where someone is hustling their ass to get gigs and only requires a quick “yay or nay” response from me, I’m on it. A lack of response is too ambiguous to be able plan with.

    Think about how much communication needs to happen to line up a prospective gig. And all any of the other members need to do stay involved is reply with one word. If someone can’t commit to that, maybe they should rethink what it means to be in a band.
    gln1955, TNCreature, dayo and 31 others like this.
  8. Splash7

    Splash7 The Determined Bass Player Supporting Member

    Sep 18, 2019
    @DirtDog beat me to it. :laugh: But I will let my post remain. (Gotta post faster, darn ADHD)

    I am new to TB and enjoy most of the threads. The threads, such as this one dealing with band management, seem to always have a common theme. The group dynamics of a band are usually a constant issue. I have never been in a band so I don't have any first hand knowledge, just observations from the outside. I would think that being a member of a band would basically require two things: being able to play music well enough to even be in a band, and commitment.

    Commitment requires communication. And communication is a lot easier today than it was 20, 30 years ago or longer. Telephones, cellphones, email, test messages, Facebook messenger, and so on. Anyone remember the days when we only had telephones, slow mail and telegrams?

    People are probably a lot busier in today's world than in the past. People also have more free time in today's world. If that wasn't so, nobody would have time to be in a band.

    So, it seems to me there really is no excuse for not responding to each other in a timely manner, no matter which form of communication that is available to use.

    If you make the commitment to be a functioning member of a band, then communicate with your BL. As long as he/she is not being a pain in the ass about superfluous info or questions there really is no excuse.

    And if the BL is being a pain in ass, well then, that is an entirely different group dynamic.
    mcnach, whero, viper4000 and 3 others like this.
  9. CoffeeLove

    CoffeeLove Supporting Member

    Good point, but not the case here, I am always direct and to the point, in a polite way. Here is a picture of my last message.

    Attached Files:

  10. CoffeeLove

    CoffeeLove Supporting Member

    Yep, asked if he prefers phone call, email, etc...He check his phone between songs at rehearsal, so assuming he checks it regularly throughout the day.
  11. mrcbass


    Jan 14, 2016
    Sacramento, CA
    I feel ya OP. It is really my biggest pet peeve for my band in general - response to texts re: rehearsals. I'm not a huge fan of texting, but it has value for quick turn around. But it doesn't work when folks just don't bother to respond. We always manage to make it work, but it is way harder than it has to be. I'm the GOF in my band and am not surgically attached to my phone - but I do manage to check it every couple of hours and I know the other guys are way more into the technology than I am: If the text has pictures of half naked women or some stupid meme they are all over it for days. What time do we want to start?
    Chirp, chirp.

    Very annoying. (As is so happens, we are supposed to rehearse tonight (not our normal day) and do not know what time yet.)

    I voted 24 hours. This may be too long if trying to secure a pick up gig.

    If it was just one guy and I had replacement options? Hell yeah: "Get on board or get gone!"
  12. two fingers

    two fingers Opinionated blowhard. But not mad about it. Gold Supporting Member

    Feb 7, 2005
    Eastern NC USA
    Yeah it's just time to threathim, unfortunately. It's time for an either/or deal. Either your respond in x amount of time or I will just start texting other drummers.
  13. CoffeeLove

    CoffeeLove Supporting Member

    Here is my last text. Short, friendly, and to the point.

    Attached Files:

  14. RustyAxe


    Jul 8, 2008
    As a band member one assumes a bit of responsibility to communicate promptly, by whatever mode is preferred. Booking gigs is tough enough these days (lots of competition for the same crappy gigs) without having to wait for someone to reply. In general though, I reply (or don't) whenever I feel like it. My phone, my rules. ;)

    Maybe your drummer is thinking "I need to fire myself" ... and hasn't got the stones to tell you.
  15. TheReceder


    Jul 12, 2010
    I dumped my smart phone because I got tired of a society full of phone addicts. made it clear to my bands that if there was something important, call me. One band made it clear by giving me a hard time that they didn't like having to call everyone. Waah. The average annual smartphone cost is approximately $600. To me it's a waste. To those that are addicited.. it's pennies. I made it clear that I was fed up with their needling and simply told them... if it means that much to them, all they have to do is tell me that to be in this band, I have to have a smart phone. They knew what my response would be and since then... crickets. Bass players can be tougher to find than smart phone plans.

    I can't cut the OPs drummer and slack due to the fact that he's not responding to voicemail, but I won't be critical unless the OP has asked the drummer why he's not responding to the voicemails quicker. To me 24 hours is the max, but situations differ for different people. My responses are usually immediate unless work prohibits it.
  16. mrcbass


    Jan 14, 2016
    Sacramento, CA
    Warning: Tough love to follow....

    Honestly, to me, that text does not scream "I'm trying to organize a rehearsal, please respond.":

    It reads, "Hey man, feel like hanging out and making some musical noise on Saturday or maybe next week?" Looks more like a social invitation rather than an official band request.

    Expectations should be different for these two separate events. Maybe it's your crew's style of communication, but to me, I would not view that text as urgent. (I'd still respond in some way with in a few hours, because that's just the way I am, but if I was different, I may not ever respond to what I see as a social invite.)

    And I've found that trying to conduct multiple choice texts just leads to headaches (especially in a group text).

    Perhaps you need to make your communications clearer?
  17. Killing Floor

    Killing Floor Supporting Member

    Feb 7, 2020
    Austin, TX
    I voted for 4 hours and then I saw it was for a drummer so I changed to 48 hours.

    Nothing personal against your drummer. He passed out under a mobile home yesterday. I don't know where he gets his meth money but he seems to do OK. Not sure if you knew this about your drummer, he works like firefighter shifts but with meth. 24 hours on, 48 off. So it is reasonable to expect a lag every couple days or so. No biggie. You probably already knew he's a drummer.
    I'm not sure if there's a question.
    Are you applying Bassist standards to a drummer?

    I don't expect my bird dog to nurture squirrels.
    I don't expect watermelon to be sweet in January.
    I don't expect Mexican food to be flavorful in Indiana.
    I don't expect sheetrock hangers to be careful.
    I don't expect cows to understand linear regression.
    I don't expect singers to value hard work.
    And I don't expect drummers to be on time.
  18. pcake

    pcake Supporting Member

    Sep 20, 2011
    Los Angeleez
    if it's regarding whether they'll be available for a gig, i'd call any person who doesn't respond to texts quickly. if it's regarding a rehearsal, after 24 hours, i'll make other plans.

    for anything important, i reply to texts within minutes at most. for "hey, can't wait for the new season of the mandelorian", it could be hours or a day.
    Mr_Moo, Jon McBass and Eli_Kyiv like this.
  19. Eli_Kyiv


    Apr 7, 2020
    Kyiv, Ukraine
    In my band, we have a group chat in Viber (a popular messenger here). If BL post anything there, like rehearsal date and time, it's assumed that every band member had read it. No response required if they're going to attend, but they usually confirm anyway. Those who cannot make it are required to mention it. Within 24 hours is fine.
    mcnach likes this.
  20. Shouldn't matter how he asks, the person should answer in a timely manner. I do see your point though, which leads me to mine: The least he could do is say "I'll get back to ya" so the sender knows he acknowledged it. Most people wont because they want to leave "I just seen this!" or "oh sorry I missed/never got your text" as an option. Every time a band member (or anyone in life for that matter) doesn't respond, it's usually because they are not enthusiastic about the situation. Our old singer would ghost us until the day before practice to give us an answer. We knew it was because he wanted to wait and see if something else came up he'd rather do instead.
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    Primary TB Assistant

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