Wow, another reading-vs-feel thread - really?
First of all, to straighten out metaphors. The literacy metaphor is perfectly appropriate, and standard notation is NOT a language, it is a writing system. Illiterate people can tell stories, pass along the news, even recite poetry and argue philosophy, without reading a single page. Musicians can play music without ever reading a note from a staff (or using any OTHER writing system). The language is not the writing, it is the music itself.
Of course, there are benefits to literacy, both in language and in music. I can tell a longer and more complex story by writing it up into a novel than if I tried to make it up orally or tell it in a version I had memorized (though you'd be amazed what oral storytellers can do in some cultures). I can access much greater depth of philosophical thought if I can read the books of long dead philosophers than if I depend on only the ideas people I have conversations with tell me. And likewise, in music, I will be able to do a lot more if I can interpret written music rather than relying on what I come up with out of my own head or what I can learn "orally."
Having said that, if someone wants to have a conversation with me, I don't ask him to write me a note. I listen to what he's saying and I talk back. If someone wants to jam with me, I don't ask for a sheet of written music, I listen to what he's playing and I play back.
I don't resist the idea of learning to read. I don't buy the myth that being able to read hinders your "feel" any more than reading books hinders your ability to talk. I can read, though a bit haltingly (I'm in Phalex's boat here, sounds like). But the fact is that, since I'm not a professional musician, and have no aspirations to be, I don't have call to read very much. Pretty much all the settings I play in, people just want to have conversations, and my oral language skills are all I need.
And that's all I have to say about that.