First and foremost, I don't know anything about playing the drums. I only know what I like to hear in a drummer.
1) The obvious. They must be able to play in time at the right tempo all of the time.
2) A good sense of dynamics
3) Creativity
I hate to have to say this but you may just have to tell him the cold hard truth, especially if he doesn't respond well to sugar coated suggestions. If he doesn't respond to the cold hard truth then he may have to be replaced which is unfortunate if he truly is a good guy.
I once worked with a guitarist who at first listen seemed as though he was a really good guitar player. The problem was that he was over indulgent and repetetive in every aspect of his music. We were trying to come up with what I would describe as "three to three and a half minute heavy yet radio friendly pop tunes". He only wanted to play in dropped-D and he felt as though it was absolutely necessary to play a lead that lasted at least 16 bars in every song. His leads sounded the same from one song to the next. It just didn't work with what we were trying to do. We gave him suggestions and he didn't listen. We recorded our rehearsals to try and prove our point to him as well as convince him that it was not a good idea for him to sing backup. We finally had to just tell him the truth. All of this was to no avail. We finally had to let him go. The part that sucked the worst was that he really was a cool person. He had been playing for 15 years. We replaced him with someone who had been playing for a year and we sounded better immediately because the new guy just understood what the songs needed to sound good. The guy we let go was pissed but he ended up finding a blues/gospel gig that he fit in with really well.
Sometimes we spare people the truth because we don't want to hurt their feelings. In doing so, we create a lack of communication which in turn creates a breakdown in our interpersonal relationships. When this happens, the relationship, whether it be a friend; significant other; co-worker or a band, is doomed to fail.
1) The obvious. They must be able to play in time at the right tempo all of the time.
2) A good sense of dynamics
3) Creativity
I hate to have to say this but you may just have to tell him the cold hard truth, especially if he doesn't respond well to sugar coated suggestions. If he doesn't respond to the cold hard truth then he may have to be replaced which is unfortunate if he truly is a good guy.
I once worked with a guitarist who at first listen seemed as though he was a really good guitar player. The problem was that he was over indulgent and repetetive in every aspect of his music. We were trying to come up with what I would describe as "three to three and a half minute heavy yet radio friendly pop tunes". He only wanted to play in dropped-D and he felt as though it was absolutely necessary to play a lead that lasted at least 16 bars in every song. His leads sounded the same from one song to the next. It just didn't work with what we were trying to do. We gave him suggestions and he didn't listen. We recorded our rehearsals to try and prove our point to him as well as convince him that it was not a good idea for him to sing backup. We finally had to just tell him the truth. All of this was to no avail. We finally had to let him go. The part that sucked the worst was that he really was a cool person. He had been playing for 15 years. We replaced him with someone who had been playing for a year and we sounded better immediately because the new guy just understood what the songs needed to sound good. The guy we let go was pissed but he ended up finding a blues/gospel gig that he fit in with really well.
Sometimes we spare people the truth because we don't want to hurt their feelings. In doing so, we create a lack of communication which in turn creates a breakdown in our interpersonal relationships. When this happens, the relationship, whether it be a friend; significant other; co-worker or a band, is doomed to fail.
