Does anyone else have a lot of trouble with knowing what to say to other people, as well as hyper self-awareness in social situations? What are some coping techniques?
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Aspergers club commence.
- Thread starter MuinXing
- Start date
Step 1, is realizing there i is no right way to do things.
Regular folk do things wrong all the time, they simply mix things up from being wrong to less wrong. They simply have instincts that we lack. This means your in a sense flying blind, that does not me your unable to learn from experience.
Step 2 is take a record of the things you do. Never try to label them as right or wrong, but simply take note.
Step 3 is practice trying new things and finding strategies.
Step 4 is just finding what works, and sticking to the plan.
The worst thing you can do is react out of nervousness or fear, it causes you do act impulsively when you shouldn't.
Step 5 is setting a standard for your behavior, the biggest problem with being an aspie is that regular folk are as unsure of how to act around you as you are. They can't read you this is both a good and bad thing.
The trick is developing a standard for your actions, so others can learn to work with you. If you take things literally, don't try to hide that, let others know your simply like that.
So many of our problems are defined by our inability to have moment to moment instincts, this simply means we have to stay in character.
Truth. The forums that are dedicated toward malady / condition tend to be dominated by people who see life ONLY through that malady / condition. This is why I absolutely hate it when people say "I'm ADHD" (or whatever). No, you're not ADHD. You HAVE ADHD. To say that you ARE something tells me that you're letting it have you.
/ WP forum and mindset rant.
Carry on.
Actually, I'm normally pretty good with social situations. I usually don't have much of a problem but it wasn't always like that for sure. When I was younger, people used to say "oh he's sooo shy", but it wasn't that at all. I really wanted to interact but it was such a challenge. It was as though maintaining the proper eye contact, distance, body language was such a challenge to consciously maintain, that the verbal component would be reeeeaaally hard to keep up. Like you remember to look someone in the eye, but then forget what you were about to say because your brain is focused on the eye contact instead.... so you stand there looking like a dork.
I learned an awful lot by observing other people that I like interact and I've emulated them. To use an analogy - to me it's almost like when you learn to play bass - you learn the basic notes and technique, then watch/listen to others and emulate their approach until you almost develop a style of your own. Confidence in your ability is also very important and it shows. It still gets awkward for me sometimes, yeah but generally I enjoy the hell out of it. (interacting with others I mean)
Blastoff - thanks I'll do so in a few. Much appreciated
Agreed it can be a bit much at times, however I view myself as aspie, I don't think it limits me, but it is who I am.
Anyhow do you have any interest in a group of people that are trying trying get involved into something a little more proactive, and a little less directed at a supposed impairment.
I got interest in forming something.
Not a support group or nothing, more like creating a catalog of aspie musicians, artists, writers etc,.
Diagnosis is often counterproductive.
I prefer to say I'm naturally obsessive versus having an impairment.
I really don't see it as a bad thing, my main issue is that regular people are too casual to have strong interest.
executive function disorder.. you know, that's the first time I ever heard of that one. Did a little bit on research and it fits me to a tee! Sheesh
This thread has been seriously helpful!!
^^^
Here's a thread that concisely explains the five components of executive function:
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
I found it helpful, anyway.
Here's a thread that concisely explains the five components of executive function:
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
I found it helpful, anyway.
Thanks it is helpful for sure! like I said earlier, I've never been diagnosed with anything as I never really made the attempt to do so, but going through info like this is really eye-opening. I can't "officially" say that I have Asperger's or ADD, or Executive Function Disorder, but I have 100% always known that there's something not quite right and this stuff really hits home. It's almost like a relief to see a name for it!
My aspie kids have higher IQs, but I have higher function. My professional work became my obsession and I relentlessly pursued each problem from every possible angle.
There seems to be subtle difference in symptoms that can create a huge difference in outcomes. It's also true that a remarkable number of high achievers are depressive, bi-polar, even schizophrenic. Those folks are also on a continuum where small changes are the difference between life and death, wealth and homelessness. If we can tame the wild power of our minds we can achieve remarkable things.
There seems to be subtle difference in symptoms that can create a huge difference in outcomes. It's also true that a remarkable number of high achievers are depressive, bi-polar, even schizophrenic. Those folks are also on a continuum where small changes are the difference between life and death, wealth and homelessness. If we can tame the wild power of our minds we can achieve remarkable things.
