I play with a great bunch of guys. It's the psycho (certified!) wife of our guitarist that will be our undoing...
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Bandmate pet peeves
- Thread starter ShadowImage
- Start date
I had a singer that used my sweat towel. Closest I ever came to walking off the stage, I think. Like I'm going to wipe the sweat off my face with his sweat all over it... Gross!
I find that a lot of musicians have limited vision and play more for themselves than the audience. Then they wonder why they can't get booked because all they want to do is rip peoples faces of for 4 hours. Gotta play some chill stuff, too or people will leave.
And yeah, the being late thing doesn't work for me.
I find that a lot of musicians have limited vision and play more for themselves than the audience. Then they wonder why they can't get booked because all they want to do is rip peoples faces of for 4 hours. Gotta play some chill stuff, too or people will leave.
And yeah, the being late thing doesn't work for me.
There are quite a few, but really, my bandmates are great. It's usually me that has an issue, not them. As in, my view of things. We're all fallible. I'm sure there are things I do that annoy them. I try to make sure I am respectful and tidy though. really though, as much as I'd like to say we talk and communicate a lot, we suck at getting our points across at times. I really think it's a city/suburb thing though. It's so weird. Me and the vocalist are from the burbs, born and raised. The drummer and guitarist are from the city, born and raised. They like to constantly talk over each other and just go on and on and on and on to where it just goes in circles. Me and the vocalist have a hard time with that a lot. My vocalist gets butt hurt WAY to easily though haha I think I'm too forward at times too though. I just don't like sugarcoating stuff of handling things gently. We're all grown men.
Negative energy.
More often than not my singer/guitarist is in a foul mood at rehearsals, and it tends to suck the fun out of it for me.
I try to avoid discussions about politics, as it is one of his triggers.
I am always happy to be playing, & I just don't understand how some people can constantly be in a bad mood...
More often than not my singer/guitarist is in a foul mood at rehearsals, and it tends to suck the fun out of it for me.
I try to avoid discussions about politics, as it is one of his triggers.
I am always happy to be playing, & I just don't understand how some people can constantly be in a bad mood...
On a gig, noodling around between songs. Very unprofessional, in my book.
A few of my own:
- people who show up unprepared
- people who show up late without a good excuse
- drummers who lose tempo when they attempt to sing or play fills beyond their abilities
- guitarists who don't understand the need to find a tone that fits the band instead of their ego
- passive aggressiveness
- people who don't understand volume
- players who settle for good enough
- players who think things sound better than they really are because they aren't actually listening
- noodling constantly
- individuals who don't want to do what is necessary to lead a successful band but still think their opinions should have as much weight in band decisions
- people who show up unprepared
- people who show up late without a good excuse
- drummers who lose tempo when they attempt to sing or play fills beyond their abilities
- guitarists who don't understand the need to find a tone that fits the band instead of their ego
- passive aggressiveness
- people who don't understand volume
- players who settle for good enough
- players who think things sound better than they really are because they aren't actually listening
- noodling constantly
- individuals who don't want to do what is necessary to lead a successful band but still think their opinions should have as much weight in band decisions
My pet peeves are entirely directed as one person. He's a very close friend who I've played in different bands with since high school so it's clearly not a deal breaker. Be responsible for you own equipment. The amount of times I've heard him ask if someone else brought his cables or asking the other guitar player for a pick or to use his tuner is mind boggling. Then last spring the morning after a gig he asks in the band group text "did someone get my guitar". I lit into him. Luckily the bar still had it, unfortunately the hour and a half round trip and $5 toll to go get it didn't teach him his lesson. Also asking the sound guy for cables makes all of us look like clowns.
The biggest one is bandmates who do not respond to direct questions in email. I like to book in email, it's less intrusive than a text and much easier to search through at a later date.
But some people seem to need a text to tell them to answer their email! How are you going to save the world if you can't even answer your email??
But some people seem to need a text to tell them to answer their email! How are you going to save the world if you can't even answer your email??
Singers can beat your nerves up quicker than anything. Especially the ones that have iffy rhythm and can't seem to remember to tell the audience about the merchandise table and newly released ep cause they drank up the bands beer allotment while the band was loading in and sound checking. Delicate Geniuses.
- Oct 7, 2000
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I just posted something else that has to kinda do with this.
Familiarity breeds contempt.
I wrestle with this.
When I know people well, things that others would never notice about them begin to stand out for me. I'm starting to see this as an issue within myself that I need to work on. People I know really well well often irk the hell out of me, with things that really aren't that big a deal. I think it has to do with sincerity, or lack of it. I have issues with disingenuous people. Selfish people, too.
Familiarity breeds contempt.
I wrestle with this.
When I know people well, things that others would never notice about them begin to stand out for me. I'm starting to see this as an issue within myself that I need to work on. People I know really well well often irk the hell out of me, with things that really aren't that big a deal. I think it has to do with sincerity, or lack of it. I have issues with disingenuous people. Selfish people, too.
- Dec 21, 2007
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- Lark in the Morning Instructional Videos; Audix Microphones
Since you said you're wrestling with this - often what irks us most is an issue we see, or are working on, or are trying not to look at, in ourselves.
It may be worth some self-reflection to see what calls this up for you.
- Oct 7, 2000
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I've heard this many times, and questioned it.
I believe that sometimes there's truth to that. I believe however that the things that get to me most aren't the things I recognize in myself, but rather, the things I know I'd NEVER EVER do. I know many honest people who abhor liars. Peace loving people who despise war. Compassionate people, who have real issues with people who have no compassion. The list goes on and on.
When people do things that are incomprehensible to me, I get bothered. The work I believe I have to do within myself regarding that is become more accepting.
I really think your statement is something someone once said that sounded great, so it stuck somehow. I don't think there's a whole lot of validity to it though. Only in some isolated instances.
Think about it, regarding yourself and things that bother you most about people.
AAAAARGHHHH!!! The Drummer!!! 3 issues from last night's gig.
Played a small town General Store Christmas Party. Great fun, since everybody knows everybody else.
1. Drummer sets up. I respect this and stay my distance, letting him get totally set-up. I almost stepped on his carpet. He noticed. It's like he needs 2 feet of "aura space" whilst setting up. Sheesh.
2. Almost ALL the songs increased in tempo throughout the song. "Moondance" ended up sounding like a 2/4 line-dance song. Then, the drummer has the nerve to blame it on the "sit-in" horn players! He griped and ranted on and I finally said, "HEY! You're the drummer!" He bowed his head and shut up for a couple minutes.
3. Teardown........ As soon as it was over, he grabs a bunch of his drum and cymbal cases and stacks them on-and-around my bass stack. I said, "Hey! Kind of a double standard here, huh?" (It really didn't bother me; I just had to point it out to Mr. Diva) He looked at the stuff and said, "Oh! Sorry". Then he proceeded to disassemble his kit while I waited for him. Lol.
OK, that's MY rant/whine/gripe. I'm feeling better now. Thanks, TB.
Played a small town General Store Christmas Party. Great fun, since everybody knows everybody else.
1. Drummer sets up. I respect this and stay my distance, letting him get totally set-up. I almost stepped on his carpet. He noticed. It's like he needs 2 feet of "aura space" whilst setting up. Sheesh.
2. Almost ALL the songs increased in tempo throughout the song. "Moondance" ended up sounding like a 2/4 line-dance song. Then, the drummer has the nerve to blame it on the "sit-in" horn players! He griped and ranted on and I finally said, "HEY! You're the drummer!" He bowed his head and shut up for a couple minutes.
3. Teardown........ As soon as it was over, he grabs a bunch of his drum and cymbal cases and stacks them on-and-around my bass stack. I said, "Hey! Kind of a double standard here, huh?" (It really didn't bother me; I just had to point it out to Mr. Diva) He looked at the stuff and said, "Oh! Sorry". Then he proceeded to disassemble his kit while I waited for him. Lol.
OK, that's MY rant/whine/gripe. I'm feeling better now. Thanks, TB.
I'm pretty lucky, I play with good players that are good people that come to rehearse prepared. Only thing that bothers me is sometimes they tend to feel like they should always be playing. They often invade each other's sonic space. Remember " Leave some holes to let the music fall out.". I don't want to ways be pointing that out so I often just keep smiling but thinking.......that could have sounded even better. Small potatoes for a weekend warrior.
What bugs me is watching them coil up cables at the end of the show. They grab one end of the cord in their hand and wind the cable around their elbow and then use the last couple of feet to tie it up.
And that pet peeve leads to the bigger pet peeve which happens before the show when they pull those tangled, kinked, knotted cables out and hook them up and spend 20 minutes trying to find all the bad cables that crackle, hum, are intermittent or simply don't work at all.
I made all my own cables about 40 years ago - I wind them up in nice, round loops - and I "over/under" coil longer cables so they don't twist up when you uncoil them. I use a Velcro strip to hold them. My 40 year old cables don't have kinks. They are quiet. They work.
And that pet peeve leads to the bigger pet peeve which happens before the show when they pull those tangled, kinked, knotted cables out and hook them up and spend 20 minutes trying to find all the bad cables that crackle, hum, are intermittent or simply don't work at all.
I made all my own cables about 40 years ago - I wind them up in nice, round loops - and I "over/under" coil longer cables so they don't twist up when you uncoil them. I use a Velcro strip to hold them. My 40 year old cables don't have kinks. They are quiet. They work.
I'm going to have to add to my list of pet peeves, guys who think they are your boss/dad/big brother who make you feel like crap for being late, ignoring all the other contributions you bring to the band. But hey, that's why I'm almost always the band leader. I don't have a time clock to punch in at the studio just like I don't have one at the office. If they ever put one in, that's the day I find a different office.
Didn't read the whole thread........but this really gets to me.
People who say they want to be in a band and rock the house. Have whole homes filled with gear and every fancy doohicky ever made. Complain that no one is hiring live music anymore. But then, at the gig, can hardly wait to be done with it and go home. Just absolutely drives me up the friggen wall! What IS that?
It's like they always want to be somewhere ELSE! ????????????????????
People who say they want to be in a band and rock the house. Have whole homes filled with gear and every fancy doohicky ever made. Complain that no one is hiring live music anymore. But then, at the gig, can hardly wait to be done with it and go home. Just absolutely drives me up the friggen wall! What IS that?
It's like they always want to be somewhere ELSE! ????????????????????
1. Drummers who can't maintain a constant tempo.
2. Guitar players who can't stop noodling.
3. BL/singer who can't get thru a set without dropping F-bombs into the mic.
4. Band members who disappear when it's time to pack up gear.
Cr@p I deal with every gig. But I've only gotta do it 3 more times, then this band is done!
2. Guitar players who can't stop noodling.
3. BL/singer who can't get thru a set without dropping F-bombs into the mic.
4. Band members who disappear when it's time to pack up gear.
Cr@p I deal with every gig. But I've only gotta do it 3 more times, then this band is done!
