Bullying

[Metalbasspro]

Why is it tolerated? Why do School admin people look away and pretend it does not exist? With modern bullying resulting in murders why is it not taken more serious? Like go on social media and make reference to shooting up a school and bam it is instantly addressed by law enforcement. Bring a pop tart to school and say bang and bam they are kicked out faster then you can say "it was just a pop tart"!


What happened to the days then a family member or uncle could take care of business and the problem would stop over night? Are human beings really this pusified? Where did everyone's balls go? And I mean stats are showing that special needs people are bullied more then normal developed people. Why is this tolerated? A blind kid was being punched by a bully in a school hall about a month ago. A football player stopped the assault by making the bully his B****, had him on the ground and told him never to mess with that blind kid again.

They kicked him out of school. In a sane world he'd be given a medal.

 

[two fingers]

I think the problem is isolated. What I mean is, in some schools you can't swing a dead cat without hitting anti bullying poster. Principals are tough on it in most places. Heck, Ashville NC recently had a whole festival (or something like that) on anti bullying. It made national news.

Where I grew up we played it smart. We took care of business off of school grounds. Bullies got taken care of in a hurry. But nobody got in trouble because they were dealt with in the neighborhood. My dad taught me from a young age to stray from violence..... Unless there was a bully involved. Then I was taught to unleash and let the chips fall where they may. I think part of the problem these days is that dads are wussies, not very involved (face glued to a TV, computer, or phone), or not there at all. It all hinges on dad's to me. The fall of our country in general (to me) can be tied to femanists, hippies, and all others who espoused views which lead to girly men. No, there should not be mostly "gender neutral" toys. Boys should not play with Barbie dolls. They should go outside and plow into each other until cuts and bruises occur. They should lose at sports and go back to play again next week because it's the right thing to do. They should stand up for weaker kids.... even if that means punching a bully in the nose. They should hold doors for ladies/girls. They should say "yes sir" and "no ma'am". They should play in the dirt and learn how to swing a hammer. They should be learning how to be strong, respectful MEN.

They should NOT BE learning "tolerance" and "sympathy" for the views of the bully. Bullies see that as weakness and it only serves to cause them to strike harder. End of story.

 

[Gravedigger Dav]

^ + 1
I needn't say more.

 

[JMacBass65]

I think the problem is isolated. What I mean is, in some schools you can't swing a dead cat without hitting anti bullying poster. Principals are tough on it in most places. Heck, Ashville NC recently had a whole festival (or something like that) on anti bullying. It made national news.

Where I grew up we played it smart. We took care of business off of school grounds. Bullies got taken care of in a hurry. But nobody got in trouble because they were dealt with in the neighborhood. My dad taught me from a young age to stray from violence..... Unless there was a bully involved. Then I was taught to unleash and let the chips fall where they may. I think part of the problem these days is that dads are wussies, not very involved (face glued to a TV, computer, or phone), or not there at all. It all hinges on dad's to me. The fall of our country in general (to me) can be tied to femanists, hippies, and all others who espoused views which lead to girly men. No, there should not be mostly "gender neutral" toys. Boys should not play with Barbie dolls. They should go outside and plow into each other until cuts and bruises occur. They should lose at sports and go back to play again next week because it's the right thing to do. They should stand up for weaker kids.... even if that means punching a bully in the nose. They should hold doors for ladies/girls. They should say "yes sir" and "no ma'am". They should play in the dirt and learn how to swing a hammer. They should be learning how to be strong, respectful MEN.

They should NOT BE learning "tolerance" and "sympathy" for the views of the bully. Bullies see that as weakness and it only serves to cause them to strike harder. End of story.

Wow, way to lay it out there.

I happen to agree with you, but I think there will be a number of those wussy dads who are going to say "you're the problem".

My boy was dealing with some minor bullying last year. It never got physical, and it was within a circle of friends - but clearly some the boys testosterone was beginning to kick in earlier than others, and the group dynamics were changing. We are talking 11 year olds and this was playing out on the soccer field, I was one of the coaches. At one point while we were driving home and talking through some of this, I finally told him "you might need to just get in his face and tell him to eff off, because until you do, he's going to keep talking poopie."

I usually self censor around my kids, but I was pissed - I wanted to pummel the punk myself.

I never really saw anything play out in front of me, but over the course of the season, the bullying stopped. The boys are still friendly, but not as close as they were.

 

[Gorn]

I graduated high school 14 years ago and I have no kids so I honestly don't know how bad the bullying situation really is nowadays. But I suspect it's not nearly as big a problem as it's made out to be and kids would be better off if they toughened up a bit. We're raising a generation of kids that'll cry when something goes wrong as an adult.

 

[Killed_by_Death]

Only time I've had to intervene was a long time ago. I just stopped the school bus & confronted the kid. No more problems. The kids talked about it for weeks.

 

[Gravedigger Dav]

I agree with the captain. I doubt it is any worse than it has ever been. I think it is out victim/nanny culture that makes everyone a little crazier over it.
I found out as a kid who was bullied that all it take is one physical confrontation. Whether you win or lose, the bullying stops. Bullies are usually cowards with low self esteem who bully to make them feel better about themselves and make others think they are tough.
My first year in junior high I was bullied by this one guy named Beck. One day I was in the cafeteria line and I was wearing the dinner jacket the orchestra had to wear for out performance right after lunch. Beck got in line behind me and started his nonsense. I reached my limit and as I turned around laid a punch in the middle of his face. He landed on his back and I jumped on him and continued pummeling him until the coach yanked me up by my shirt collar.
In those day, there was corporal punishment. I had to go with the coach to get my mandatory 3 licks with the paddle for fighting. When the coach was done, he complimented my on a great punch.
I was never bullied in that school again.

 

[Killed_by_Death]

I found out as a kid who was bullied that all it take is one physical confrontation. Whether you win or lose, the bullying stops. Bullies are usually cowards with low self esteem who bully to make them feel better about themselves and make others think they are tough.

Yeah, same for me. I actually practiced karate in middle school, but no one really bugged me there.
Then I moved into a more urban area & started at high school. A new freshman is like fresh meat to sharks in high school.
Some bigger kid named Danny was constantly fooking with me. One day I had finally had it so I knocked him off the bus dock. It was a platform we all waited for the buses on.
They were calling me the karate kid for weeks & no one fooled with me for years.
The next time I had to pull out the karate chops (pun intended) was when some kid had been learning "Army karate" from his uncle & thought he would try it on with me.
It couldn't have gone down any better if I had practiced it over & over.
The kid came at me while I was leaning on a trash can. One of those with the flipper top where you stuff your trash in & the top flips in.

Anyway, when he came at me with a running frontkick, I directed his leg into the top of the trash can & just started pounding on him with one fist while I held his leg in the can with the other hand. Again, people talked about it for weeks.

 

[Gravedigger Dav]

Yeah, same for me. I actually practiced karate in middle school, but no one really bugged me there.
Then I moved into a more urban area & started at high school. A new freshman is like fresh meat to sharks in high school.
Some bigger kid named Danny was constantly fooking with me. One day I had finally had it so I knocked him off the bus dock. It was a platform we all waited for the buses on.
They were calling me the karate kid for weeks & no one fooled with me for years.
The next time I had to pull out the karate chops (pun intended) was when some kid had been learning "Army karate" from his uncle & thought he would try it on with me.
It couldn't have gone down any better if I had practiced it over & over.
The kid came at me while I was leaning on a trash can. One of those with the flipper top where you stuff your trash in & the top flips in.

Anyway, when he came at me with a running frontkick, I directed his leg into the top of the trash can & just started pounding on him with one fist while I held his leg in the can with the other hand. Again, people talked about it for weeks.

In today's world, you would be charged with assault and they would send the bully for counseling.

 

[neckdive]

Only time I've had to intervene was a long time ago. I just stopped the school bus & confronted the kid. No more problems. The kids talked about it for weeks.

I've had to do things similar to this as well. It works because boys can be intimidated by their friends' fathers. The times that I have intervened in my son's affairs (which I try to limit so that he can learn to work through them himself), I've found the other boys shocked that I would dare confront them, which I have no problem doing. Nipping this stuff in the bud quickly puts an end to it and as a bonus, shows my son, that not only am I in his corner, but here's how to not put up with people's crap. He takes karate, too, and we expect him to make blackbelt when he's a senior. That will help.

I see the wuss dad so much, that when I call out someone's BS (like the principal, teachers, other parents), they're completely shocked that someone dare question their authority.

 

[Dale D Dilly]

I don't really believe in a bullying epidemic, at least not one any larger than there has ever been. Bullying over social media makes it more visible, and the usual list of parties looking for the next thing to sensationalize have portrayed this as a trend rather than an existing issue. Once it's a hot button issue, education folks invent or adjust the metrics to track it, (and track that they're doing something about it) and this new, poor quality, data is used to justify calling the whole thing an epidemic.

Has there always been too much bullying in our schools? Sure, and we should address that largely by insisting that educators don't tolerate it. Clickbate news stories and folks making the talkshow circuit do disservice to this fact and tempt parents and educators to make poor decisions in the heat of collective overreaction.

I also think it's pretty easy to teach your kids to stand up for themselves without framing it as "if someone is pushing you around, kick their ass." A kid starting fights that he or she thinks are righteous is just as disruptive to the educational environment as a kid starting fights because he or she is a bully. The expedience of a kid stopping a single bully encounter through violence isn't worth reinforcing violence as a problem-solving tool for young people.

 

[Fishyfishfish]

different world. When I went to school if you had a problem the PE Teacher would give you 16 oz gloves and you were free to beat the piss out of each other at lunch time-supervised. Now we would all be on the news.

 

[ZenG]

These days you can end up in legal quagmire of rules, meetings, counselling, lawsuits etc etc etc etc etc etc etc. for intervening as a parent.

An old work friend told me a story one time of how he got the strap at school for absolutely nothing. The teacher blamed him for the offense but it wasn't his fault.
So his dad went to the school after arranging a meeting and decked the teacher. Nothing further happened about it but if he tried that in this day and age it would be a different story.

Kids confronting their bully is an option.....but that doesn't mean every kid is going to beat down their bully. Often the bully is bigger and stronger than the kid confronting him and the kid is not guaranteed a win.

 

[Stewie26]

I got bullied from time to time back in school. I was then taught to punch back which I did many times. And yes, I got my butt kicked from older bigger kids many times. But I found it is much better to get a bloody noise and still have my self respect than live in daily fear of a bully. The icing on the cake was in most cases, after confronting the bully, the bully would leave me alone and redirect his energy to an easier softer target.

 

[48thStreetCustom]

Seems like there's a lot less bullying going on. I see a lot of weird kids today that would have gotten beat up back in the 80s. As Bill Burr said, if you get rid of a species natural predator, the bully, the nerd population will grow exponentially.

 

[neckdive]

These days you can end up in legal quagmire of rules, meetings, counselling, lawsuits etc etc etc etc etc etc etc. for intervening as a parent.

An old work friend told me a story one time of how he got the strap at school for absolutely nothing. The teacher blamed him for the offense but it wasn't his fault.
So his dad went to the school after arranging a meeting and decked the teacher. Nothing further happened about it but if he tried that in this day and age it would be a different story.

Kids confronting their bully is an option.....but that doesn't mean every kid is going to beat down their bully. Often the bully is bigger and stronger than the kid confronting him and the kid is not guaranteed a win.

Intervening as a parent and decking a teacher are two different things entirely.

Bullies come in all sizes and shapes, including (but not limited to) judges, cops, bosses, wives/husbands, girl/boyfriends, co-workers, and loony dads socking teachers out for false-paddlings.

 

[DiabolusInMusic]

Why is it tolerated? Why do School admin people look away and pretend it does not exist? With modern bullying resulting in murders why is it not taken more serious? Like go on social media and make reference to shooting up a school and bam it is instantly addressed by law enforcement. Bring a pop tart to school and say bang and bam they are kicked out faster then you can say "it was just a pop tart"!


What happened to the days then a family member of uncle could take care of business and the problem wold stop over night? Are human beings really this pusified? Where did everyone's balls go? And I mean stats are showing that special needs people are bullied more then normal developed people. Why is this tolerated? A blind kid was being punched by a bully in a school hall about a month ago. A football player stopped the assault by making the bully his B****, had him on the ground and told him never to mess with that blind kid again.

They kicked him out of school. In a sane world he'd be given a medal.

I hope you realize the irony in a post complaining about bullying that questions people's lack of balls and refers to the "pusification" of human beings. Those are quite sexist remarks to be making.

 

[ZenG]

Intervening as a parent and decking a teacher are two different things entirely.

Bullies come in all sizes and shapes, including (but not limited to) judges, cops, bosses, wives/husbands, girl/boyfriends, co-workers, and loony dads socking teachers out for false-paddlings.

"socking teachers out for false paddlings"...that's not bullying....that's justice.....

What's the difference between a bully and a teacher that has it in for your child? You yourself said bullies come in all shapes and sizes.

 

[DiabolusInMusic]

"socking teachers out for false paddlings"...that's not bullying....that's justice.....

What's the difference between a bully and a teacher that has it in for your child? You yourself said bullies come in all shapes and sizes.

How is bullying the bully solving the problem? If anything, that is just perpetuating the issue.

For the record, justice is handed out by the state, anything else is just revenge.

 

[ZenG]

How is bullying the bully solving the problem? If anything, that is just perpetuating the issue.

For the record, justice is handed out by the state, anything else is just revenge.

Many of the posts here state confronting the bully by the victim as the answer....and magically they won't bother you again.

In the old days when "The Code Of The West" was in vogue you didn't wait for the state to decide whether justice was to be dispensed......the townspeople gathered together and took care of the problem. Righteousness ruled the day. At least that's how it went in the movies...