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Can this Band be Saved / Changed?

#161
i choose this one:
3. Look for another band that is already doing the things I think should be done.

51PRI said:
So far:
1. The BL posted a song that he wants to learn. It's a blues.
2. The LG posted a song that he wants to learn. It's an old song but one I've never played and it should be a good dance song and it isn't a blues song. So its a +
3. The BL for some reason posted the chords to the song I chose. They're totally wrong, not even in the key of the record, which means he got them online instead of learning it from the recording.
Click to expand...

sounds like these guys are totally happy with the way things are. if you like playing with them, maybe find another band that does what you want to do so you find some satisfaction playing. if you're not happy playing with them, find another band and give the first band notice. it seems you're not happy and they are - they agree with you to make you happy, but no real changes.

good luck!
 
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#162
BlueTalon said:
I get that a death of someone near the band could put practice off, but everything else about that seems a little weird. The BL comes across as rather weak. I'd expect a BL communication to be more along the lines of
"Let me know if you have a commitment for next Thursday. If your calendar is clear, we're going to practice."
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Well, to be fair, he doesn't live in the town where the rest of us live, and where we practice but he does work here, so, depending on his work schedule he might have to drive in JUST to practice
 
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#163
51PRI said:
Well, to be fair, he doesn't live in the town where the rest of us live, and where we practice but he does work here, so, depending on his work schedule he might have to drive in JUST to practice
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Fair enough, but my point remains. I'd expect a BL to find out when we all can practice, but then telling us when practice will be after he gets that information. To see if everyone is still on for practice, there's a way of doing it that demonstrates authority and a way that demonstrates weakness.

"Practice is still on for 6:00 this evening. Let me know if there's a problem."
"Are we still practicing?"

As a band member, what thoughts or feelings are evoked by those two examples of BL communication?
 
#164
BlueTalon said:
Fair enough, but my point remains. I'd expect a BL to find out when we all can practice, but then telling us when practice will be after he gets that information. To see if everyone is still on for practice, there's a way of doing it that demonstrates authority and a way that demonstrates weakness.

"Practice is still on for 6:00 this evening. Let me know if there's a problem."
"Are we still practicing?"

As a band member, what thoughts or feelings are evoked by those two examples of BL communication?
Click to expand...
My impression, when he texted "are we still practicing?" is that he really didn't want to practice
 
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#165
51PRI said:
My impression, when he texted "are we still practicing?" is that he really didn't want to practice
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Not a good sign.

I just re-read the opening post. It appears everything is trending downward. The only thing that would save the band at this point IMO is if everybody agreed to start fresh. Dress up for the next gig, learn some new non-blues songs, and work on a new attitude. Sadly, I don't think there's any chance of that happening.
 
#166
BlueTalon said:
Not a good sign.

I just re-read the opening post. It appears everything is trending downward. The only thing that would save the band at this point IMO is if everybody agreed to start fresh. Dress up for the next gig, learn some new non-blues songs, and work on a new attitude. Sadly, I don't think there's any chance of that happening.
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Well, we finally had our rehearsal of new (to us) songs, and I must say that it went better that I had anticipated. I could tell that everyone had worked on the songs and they came together pretty well. Three of the four new songs that we worked on are non-blues songs so I think maybe we're in the right direction, and I didn't have to even have a discussion with them about it, so that was good. We will still have to practice them again before we gig them, but I'm optimistic.
 
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#167
I have found this quote to be helpful " ...acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation - some fact of my life - unacceptable to me. I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment."
Once this has been achieved then I am in a better position to learn lessons, make choices etc.

Do I live by this? With ease I forget. I'm soon reminded.
 
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#168
BucketOfFish said:
I have found this quote to be helpful " ...acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation - some fact of my life - unacceptable to me. I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment."
Once this has been achieved then I am in a better position to learn lessons, make choices etc.

Do I live by this? With ease I forget. I'm soon reminded.
Click to expand...
Well, that is probably a good way to have a peaceful, easy life, but acceptance of the status quo won't leave opportunities to improve what is seen as a bad situation, will it? Should one see things that they think are wrong and just accept them?
 

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