Dutch Oven

[bluestarbass]

One time, I knocked up my wife up, and she bore me a child! LOL! I still haven't lived that one down...

awesome just awesome

 

[ThatGermanDude]

bump-i have nothing

 

[SoComSurfing]

Years ago I took my longtime girlfriend to an upscale restaurant (Chez Panisse) for an anniversary. Halfway through dinner I took a small sip of red wine and casually spit it across the table onto her nice white blouse.

I then called over the waiter and told him my date had too much to drink and spilled, and could he get us some club soda and towel? She just glared at me.

A bit later she returned the favor, spitting wine on me. Unfortunately for her, our waiter had walked up behind her right as she was doing it. He looked at her with the oddest expression I've ever seen, she shrunk in her chair and looked sheepish and I laughed hysterically.

Hilarious!

One time, I knocked up my wife up, and she bore me a child! LOL! I still haven't lived that one down...

/thread

 

[Fontaine]

I like to give air gifts. Fart into my hand and then casually open the flower in front of her face.

thats called a scobby snack

 

[disenchant]

Here's one that's not gross, but AWESOME!!!

My ex and I (the same gurl whose leg I peed on) were out at an upper scale restaurant for dinner. After we ordered, while waiting for our main course, she excused herself to the bathroom. While she was gone, the main course was delivered. When she returned, she sat, and gently laid the V-string she was wearing across my plate. I was like: "CHECK PLEASE!!!!!!"

Thanx for the tip! I tried it last Saturday, except I slipped them in his pocket. It got me out of the boring wedding immediately!!

 

[arbitrary]

Once, while in the shower together I peed on her leg, then called her attention to it.

I tell her it gets rid of her athletes feet.

 

[john turner]

OT is back!