• TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
    Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
    Join free Log in
    Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.

Facial Hair Oddities

Bryan R. Tyler

Bryan R. Tyler

TalkBass: Usurping My Practice Time Since 2002
Staff member
Administrator
Gold Supporting Member
Supporting Member
May 3, 2002
28,948
20,932
Connecticut
www.bryanrtyler.com
Disclosures
Reviewer: Bass Player Magazine
#1
I don't think I was meant to have facial hair. Maybe it's all my indian ancestry, but I have all sorts of weird facial hair things happening; can't grow sideburns, cheeks are patchy at best, and every week I have some sort of issue with hairs growing like corkscrews or being too thick to come out of a pore and hurting or just being too damn thick. I just pulled this one out of my chin. Remember Jeff Goldblum in The Fly?
 

Attachments

  • IMG_1138.JPG
    IMG_1138.JPG
    720.3 KB · Views: 36
  • Like
Reactions: murphy and TOOL460002
#2
TMI warning: I get occasional hairs growing from the top of my nose that are like rat mole whiskers or something - like no other hair on my body - stick straight out, thick and stiff, and very sensitive at the root to any movement. Very annoying. I pluck them when I can. Ah the joys of getting old.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: murphy
#3
I have a lovely handlebar mustache, but cannot grow a full beard. My cheeks and sideburns aren't thick enough, plus my left sideburn doesn't connect to the cheek. There's like a hairless bald gap there. And my mustache doesn't connect to my chin/goatee area. So that's why I just go with a silly mustache: it's all I've Got! Know you're not alone and I'm here for any emotional support. Feel free to PM.
 
  • Like
Reactions: murphy
#5
Bryan R. Tyler said:
I don't think I was meant to have facial hair. Maybe it's all my indian ancestry, but I have all sorts of weird facial hair things happening; can't grow sideburns, cheeks are patchy at best, and every week I have some sort of issue with hairs growing like corkscrews or being too thick to come out of a pore and hurting or just being too damn thick. I just pulled this one out of my chin. Remember Jeff Goldblum in The Fly?
Click to expand...

I can't grow a full beard OR sideburns. However, I am about to make it to my 54th birthday, and all my head hair is intact. Small blessings are still blessings.
 
  • Like
Reactions: woodyng2 and TOOL460002
#7
Savagehenry said:
Embrace it. I should shave everyday, from just below my eyes to wherever I decide to stop. I must shave it all, or deal with PIA of carefully contouring my beard or I make the guys at Duck Dynasty look like a pack of metrosexuals. Thank goodness I work in a tool shop, no need to be cleaned up all the time.
Click to expand...

Coming soon: DUCK DYNASTY METROSEXUALS

I would watch that.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gaolee and TOOL460002
#8
Hmmm.... I'm old enough to get the ear tufts and nostril hair. My son teases me mercilessly about that. Gave me a personal trimmer for Christmas.

When I grow a beard, there's a patch under my jaw on the right side that grows faster, thicker, and curlier the rest of it. I always have to give that an extra trim.

And I do get the occasional stray hair that decides it wants to grow out the side of my nose, I guess like what @bholder has. That's fun when it gets long enough to be a little blur in my peripheral vision for the left eye.
 
  • Like
Reactions: murphy
#12
I have ones like the one you posted on my under chin once in a rare while. They're always white (I'm slowly turning white in the beard) and they usually take the form of a pimple, which I'm not prone to. When I pop said pimple, what seems like a single thick, white hair with a root comes out. Upon examination, it breaks up into multiple white hairs all stemming from the same root. I collect them between sheets of loose leaf and plan to bequest them to my children upon passing.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gazman and murphy
#13
I can do a full 'stache and beard no problem, but I can't grow anything on the sides. Due to a childhood mishap, I have 2 long scars that run all the way across both cheeks. It's healed and only faintly visible if you even know to look for it, but of course hair can't grow on scar tissue so if I don't shave for a few days, I get bare stripes. What DOES grow on my cheeks looks like Beavis & Butthead that time they glued their pubes to their faces to look older. :rollno:

I also celebrated my 4th of July by liberating the single white hair that showed up in the beard. I hope it enjoys its newfound freedom from my face as it burns in hell. :rage:
 
  • Like
Reactions: murphy
#14
This thread helps illustrate why shaving can never be "one-size-fits-all." There are so many various beard types and skin types, and it takes plain old-fashioned trial and error to find what works for you.
 
#15
Bryan R. Tyler said:
I don't think I was meant to have facial hair. Maybe it's all my indian ancestry, but I have all sorts of weird facial hair things happening; can't grow sideburns, cheeks are patchy at best, and every week I have some sort of issue with hairs growing like corkscrews or being too thick to come out of a pore and hurting or just being too damn thick. I just pulled this one out of my chin. Remember Jeff Goldblum in The Fly?
Click to expand...
Sounds like razor bumps. When I was in the Corps, some guys had to use some stuff called Magic Shaving Powder. Mix a paste from the powder, slather it on, wait a minute then scrape it off with a dull blade like the spine of a butter knife. It's a depilatory, basically Nair for the face. I was such a baby face at the time I could get away with shaving twice a week.

I was a very late bloomer for facial hair. By the time I could think about growing a beard (middle 20's) I had a really nice scar running from just under my lip a little to the left of center to halfway down my throat on a diagonal to my right. When my beard did finally grow, it was the same color as my hair, except for where the scar was. It grew out solid white along both sides of the scar. My hair is really dark so I became skunk man whenever I let my stuff grow.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Gaolee, murphy and Stumbo
#17
petrus61 said:
I have ones like the one you posted on my under chin once in a rare while. They're always white (I'm slowly turning white in the beard) and they usually take the form of a pimple, which I'm not prone to. When I pop said pimple, what seems like a single thick, white hair with a root comes out. Upon examination, it breaks up into multiple white hairs all stemming from the same root. I collect them between sheets of loose leaf and plan to bequest them to my children upon passing.
Click to expand...

Well....there goes my dinner.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Tbone76, Gaolee, Stewie26 and 4 others
#18
images.jpg
I used to get ingrown hair on my neck. I had to dig them out with razors and tweezers they hurt so bad. Miserable experience not to mention the ugly wounds they leave. When I was in the Army a fellow recommended this stuff to me. That was about 1980 and I haven't had an ingrown hair since.
 
#19
Thing is I don't get any weirdness as a result of shaving. Well I do when I shave, but I haven't used a razor other than for right under my eyes in years. I just use an electric set to a long stubble once every 7-10 days- it doesn't grow very fast.

I don't think I actually grow facial hair. I think it's probably gnomes inserting hairs into my face while I sleep... slowly over time. Seems the most logical answer.
 
Last edited:

Latest posts

Top Bottom
Back