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Feeling like its time to quit bass...

#21
Thanks to most everyone. Its appreciated. This feeling kind of pops up every while. This is worse than usual which is why I decided to ask others who might have more information than myself.

To the guy who assumed I was a spoiled kid; in no way. I already have student loans, I work 40 hours a week in a commercial painting industry on top of my bass playing, and I did not drop Berklee out of that sort of motive. I was very fortunate to attend it, but I am not able to continue to pay for it after the two semesters I put in.

The idea to quit learning there was also not something I came up with. I presented my problems financially and time wise to a professor who helped me dramatically and through his coaching specifically I decided to follow the path of taking at least one semester off, with the intention to likely not go back.

A couple of you misunderstood my situation dramatically, though knowing the students up there as I do, I cannot blame you for assuming what you did.

Thank you again to everyone, and yes I know I'm young. I want to make sure I can sort this type of stuff out early in my youth so I can build myself up the way I would like to. I like planning though I guess sometimes it makes me sound pretty darn ignorant considering I am.

My issue is that no matter how much I want to network and try to, I don't seem to have any success and can't find anyone to play with or gig with.

callofcthulhu, we're definitely about similar ages. Thanks for sharing that, man.

Now to get off of the computer and learn some motown...
 
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#22
Good luck! You have an entire community of like-minded people and wise people on this forum. Don't be afraid to ask them! By no means don't ask me because I don't even have 1% of the experience you have.

I DO know a thing or two about Kpop...like that matters...off topic...sorry...
 
#26
I went through a highly regarded university music course here in Australia, and I can say I completely understand how you feel about it getting in the way of practice (in some ways). It's not about thinking nobody can teach us anything - quite the opposite! I got to work with some great, great musicians there, but I could never get right down to working on what they were giving me because it was time to go and hang with some other great musician! I did graduate, but I'm definitely going to need some serious time for it all to sink in, and to actually work through it all.

I gig all the time. On Bass. Wanna know a secret..... My degree was in trumpet. I studied trumpet. Yep.

I had some really serious struggles in my later years on trumpet. It tore me down academically, and mentally too. I'm still working through it. Bass IS my "happy instrument". It's also the one which pays the bills. I easily do 10x more gigs on bass than trumpet. And I'm a way better trumpet player than bass player. Bass brings me nothing but joy. Why? Because it doesn't matter to me (/my ego) how "good" I am on it. I'm a "trumpet player"! While you might think I was a bass player looking over my finances, I don't tie my personal worth to my bass skill. Now, attaching your personal worth to your skill in any field is really unhealthy, but that can be harder to undo.

My advice? Play keyboard. Or guitar (boo, hiss). Jam. JOIN A BAND ON GUITAR. Wouldn't that be a laugh! Who's "too good" now!
I think you'll quickly realise how much you love playing. But something's wrong... you still love bass more!
By this point, though, you'll have networked more, put your head back in the right place, and found some supportive musical mates.

Additionally, there's an amazing book called Effortless Mastery which addresses a lot of the powerful negative emotions we can fall prey to as musicians. It sounds perfect for your situation. It was recommended to me by several friends, and at first I was skeptical (it reads a little too much like a self-help book at the start, but read on, it's worth it), but it really did address a lot of things I was feeling/thinking.

Shoot me a PM if you need any details.
 
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#29
I've found learning a new instrument to be an exciting way to keep moving forward. I started on drums then bass then guitar and then vocals. If I could I'd go to recording school ala the recording workshop and make a living from the other side while opening more doors for playing. Working for a live sound company would be awesome. I myself make it a point to play live at least 2x a month makes such a difference esp with a large family.
 
#30
Yeah, do something else for a while. Learn to play acoustic guitar and sing like Gordon Lightfoot or something. Build a ship model. Fly a model drone with camera around your town. But KEEP the gear. Don't be like me and sell some nice things you will regret forever. Like my Chris Squire signature model Rick. Dang it..
 
#31
tjnkoo said:
First off, hopefully this is in the correct forum/thread if there is one for defeated rants.

Second, this will likely sound pathetic and rant-ish, so forgive me. I'm just feeling specifically low about my music/career path at the moment and could use some wisdom if someone in the forums would be kind enough to offer it.

Basically, I've invested everything I have into music. Time and money. I spent all of high school playing bass. I didn't do exceptionally well academically because I was do so much music and everything surrounding it. I played in orchestra, a couple of local bands, taught here and there, even played some musical theater gigs during senior year. I then moved from Atlanta to Boston to pursue Berklee College of Music, then realized all of the "Berklee work" was keeping me from practicing (I did get "Dean's List" during my time there). So I dropped Berklee, and am now studying exclusively under a mentor in Boston. I started practicing up to four hours a day (certainly not enough I'm sure, but for a start) and eat slept and breathed music. Yet here I am, feeling defeated to the point where I can't even pick up my bass anymore.

I've never gigged more than two or three times a year. I only had one good band, which kicked me out after a year because I was "just too good", and after a couple of years decided to just join a friend's terrible band so I'd have someone to at least play with. In three years I played about 4 or 5 non-high school related shows. That's about it up until this point.

At Berklee I only found one guitarist who I played with constantly, but he turned out to just be too flaky to deal with most of the time. I "jammed" with a few people and thought it went fantastically, but then I never heard back from anyone more than once. I'm very very humble, and I am typically extremely careful of over playing. I've even been told by a professional musician friend that I'm extremely personable and easy to deal with as a person. Its like I have every part of being a professional musician in the works, but yet nothing has come of it. I don't get any opportunities, and on the only time in probably a month and a half I've even had the chance to "jam", I just felt so awful about my playing and everything else that I didn't play well and got off on a typical blues, which I've been playing literally for 6 years now.

I've been practicing and playing more than ever in my life and yet I don't sound half as good as people who don't even practice regularly.

I signed up for an online music class while I'm home for the summer and have felt so horrible about the bass that I'm not even keeping up with that.

I have wanted to be a studio musician and gigging player in Nashville for as long as I can remember, and that's why I've done everything I've done. I wanted to play and teach and exist off of that. I moved to a new region of the country and even left college now to realize that dream. People around me in the same situations have all kinds of success and I have nothing.

I guess I feel like maybe being a musician isn't meant to be for me.
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It sounds to me like you love playing but are trying to force yourself into a direction that isn't right for you right now. I am willing to bet that if you join a band which plays mostly original music, so you can add your own parts, you will find things brightening up for you. Then, the right opportunities will come around at the right time. I went to school for art, and I knew a lot of people who really tried to become a so-called professional artist right off away. There are always those seem to make it right away, but that's just not the case with everybody. It's like winning UNO right away. It's neat, but it's not the norm by any means. Change your approach, but I think if you quit playing, you'll come back later and wish you hadn't.
I've been through all kinds of things in my time as a player that I thought would stop me, but then I met a kid with a withered right hand in a music store. He played because he wanted to, and no other reason. And, he was doing it. He was playing fine, figuring it out his own way. Nothing got in his way, not even the lack of what school and book techniques say without which it cannot be done. I always think back to that kid when I think I'm going to quit. You can do it, too.
 
#32
So, here's the stuff as it's reflected in my life. From where I sit, all the musicians I know are jaded. Anyone who plays professionally in my area knows the difficulty of scoring a decent paying gig, within a reasonable traveling distance. Most gigs are in tiny little restaurants where music was an afterthought, so you're playing in a booth, or corner of a room somewhere. So that's frustrating. Then, you spend hours honing your craft, only to find that your audience could give a crap less if you're any good. As long as they can get drunk and sing along to crappy cover tunes, they think you're the best band in the world, regardless if you have any talent whatsoever. You spend tons of money on gear, getting the best instruments and amps and strings and preamps and effects you can afford, but nobody cares if you play through a behringer or an ampeg. They always tell you you sound great, if you play that Skynard song they requested. Lastly, and in my opinion the greatest offender, musicians suck. They're jerks. They drink and smoke too much. They're ego maniacs. They're greedy. They're selfish. Obviously these are gross, sweeping generalizations, but the point is, it's often difficult to find 2,3,4 other musicians, in your vicinity, who are nice and you get along with well, who also like similar music to you, and share your vision in the direction of a band. If you find those people, hang on to them! Or, become a session/gig assassin. Look at it like work (not an approach I prefer at all). Just go into a gig like if you were going for a shift at the local factory. Do what you need to to prepare, play what you've gotta play, get paid and get out. Personally, I don't find this approach very rewarding. I do it sometimes, but prefer a more personable approach to music.

Anyway, all that being said, I'm still a musician. It's not my main gig, but it's a hobby that I make a little scratch at. I have fun playing. I gig with some great cats that I enjoy spending time with. None of us are getting rich but we have fun. I'm a little bored with the material, but it's worth it to play with some decent folks. I've played with a lot of jerks and I don't really care for it. It takes a lot more money than it used to for me to put up with peoples crap. The bottom line is, when things click, and the rhythm section is tight, and the dance floor is shaking, and people are smiling and having fun, both the audience and the band, all is right with the world, for just a little bit. All the rest of the crap is worth it, to me anyway.
 
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#33
Take a break, diversify, break your frame — DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT to reboot your consciousness.

I'll go out on a limb and infer a good deal of passivity in your post -- like you're waiting for greatness (or work) to be thrust upon you. It doesn't matter what you want in life: If you want it badly enough, if you can't live without it, then you will go out and get it. I'm not detecting that fire in your belly.

In the short term, to get out of the dumps, do something (non-musical) that makes you feel good about yourself. Accomplish something that's worthwhile to you outside of music. Do you exercise? Do you cook? Do you have other hobbies? I get into that gray place too and I try to consciously change my frame of mind when I do. Being on the computer NEVER helps. Running usually does.

I wish you luck and success, but most of all that you rise above your present slump.
 
#35
wolfkeller said:
I've found learning a new instrument to be an exciting way to keep moving forward. I started on drums then bass then guitar and then vocals. If I could I'd go to recording school ala the recording workshop and make a living from the other side while opening more doors for playing. Working for a live sound company would be awesome. I myself make it a point to play live at least 2x a month makes such a difference esp with a large family.
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This is absolutely true. The more you know about music, the better off you will be, and the more involved in all aspects of it you are, the more likely it is that you will be able to make a living. I'm strictly a day job type, but I noodle around on piano a bit, play guitar a bit more, play drums, and consider myself primarily a bass player. All those other instruments are fun, but they are also a way to drill rhythms, changes, and all kinds of other things that apply directly to bass playing.

The people I know who actually make a living playing music do a whole lot of different things that are related to playing but aren't playing. It can be producing, writing, arranging, engineering, you name it. If you look at the careers of people who aren't meteoric streaks that fizzle, you will see that they have done all kinds of things along the way.
 
#37
I think it might be helpful to experience other aspects of life to gain some perspective. Don't quit the bass, but don't go to extremes either. Try something completely different. Maybe travel, volunteer, take some philosophy courses to perk up your thought processes and help you consider other aspects of life. Take your time, reflect, breathe. Then come back to it when and IF you are ready. Life doesnt have to be just about bass. There is a whole world out there. Chances are you'll be pulled back into it and thats fine, but try to find some balance.
 
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#39
buldog5151bass said:
Take a break if you need to, but don't give it up. If you enjoy music, play it for that reason.

I think you need perspective, and maybe some time off will help. If you are lucky enough to make it your career, fantastic. Just like athletics, only a small percentage of those with talents manage to make it their career.

Long ago, I decided not to try that route, because of the long odds. For me, I play because I love music. The fact that a hobby makes money for me is just icing on the cake.

Remember why you started playing in the first place - I doubt it was because you wanted it to be you career.
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I totally agree with this. I'm by far a techincal player. I don't read music, however I want to start, and I can't jam out killer bass lines and I hate slapping cause I have problems with it. I did take a break. A nice one. But, I never gave up on what I wanted to do.
 

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