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Discussion in 'Off Topic [BG]' started by Phalex, Dec 3, 2013.

  1. Phalex

    Phalex Semper Gumby Supporting Member

    Oct 3, 2006
    G.R. MI
    I remember when this happened. Just a bunch of high school kids doing pretty much the same thing I did in high school, except things went horribly wrong.

    I really feel for this young man, as I could have easily been in his shoes. I feel for the families of the dead and injured kids too.

    There really are no winners here, but they've taken the worst thing that could possibly happen and made something beautiful out of it.


    This is What Forgiveness Looks Like

    On May 20, 2012, 18 year-old Takunda Mavima was driving home drunk from a party when he lost control and crashed his car into an off-ramp near Grand Rapids, Michigan. Riding in the car were 17 year-old, Tim See, and 15 year-old, Krysta Howell. Both were killed in the accident.

    Takunda Mavima lived.

    Mavima pleaded guilty to all charges and was sentenced to between 30 months and 15 years in prison.

    Despite their unimaginable grief and anger, both the sister and the father of victim, Tim See, gave a moving address to the court on behalf of Mavima, urging the judge to give him a light sentence.

    “I am begging you to let Takunda Mavima make something of himself in the real world — don’t send him to prison and get hard and bitter, that boy has learned his lesson a thousand times over and he’ll never make the same mistake again.”

    And when the hearing ended, the victim’s family made their way across the courtroom to embrace, console, and publicly forgive Mavima.

    There will be a time in your life when someone will wrong you. God forbid they take the life of your child. But it will happen. And what matters most isn’t how it happened, but how you respond to it.

    And if you’re a person of faith, the calling is even greater. The gospel of forgiveness isn’t a high calling for the heroic individual, or a counter-cultural description of heavenly perfection. It is a principle central to the gospel itself – the very heart of our faith in which we are called to embody.

    In the swelling sea of human destruction, the little story of Takunda Mavima and a family from Michigan is a lighthouse on a hill, a beacon of hope, guiding the way for all our ships to pass through.

    Right now, how can you prepare yourself with a clear plan of action to forgive in the darkest of times?
  2. Relic

    Relic Cow are you?

    Sep 12, 2006
    Robbinsville, NJ
    Inspiring story, it really is.
  3. Wow. That takes a mighty big person to do that.
  4. sneha1965


    Nov 7, 2007
    Pretty inspiring story. Thanks for sharing.
  5. fhm555

    fhm555 So FOS my eyes are brown Supporting Member

    Feb 16, 2011
    I consider faith to be the grace with which we handle the really crappy curveballs life throws our way.

    We can become bitter and resentful and decide life sucks and is nothing but a waiting room for death, or we can unburden our soul in the face of tragedy and accept that life is basically good and worth living in spite of the things that should never happen to us, but do anyway.

    Faith (at least to me) is not acceptance of some deity absent proof, it is that which sustains us when nothing else will. It is realizing no matter how bad it gets, it will get better so long as we are willing to work toward that end.
  6. slobake

    slobake resident ... something Supporting Member

    Great story. Good thread Phalex. Forgivness = freedom. Forgiving anyone you think has wronged you even if they have done it in the name of something that is supposed to be good. Like religion.
    It is not easy but it is simple. Sometimes my anger towards someone or something sneaks into my consciousness once again. I realize that I have to forgive again, sometimes a hundred times sometimes more. As much as it takes.
    Unforgiveness leads to bitterness and bitterness = misery.
  7. Phalex

    Phalex Semper Gumby Supporting Member

    Oct 3, 2006
    G.R. MI
    I've been wrestling with the subject lately. Nothing so extreme as this example, but still not cool on my own behalf.
  8. MakiSupaStar

    MakiSupaStar The Lowdown Diggler

    Apr 12, 2006
    Huntington Beach, CA
    Saw your FB post on this. Simply amazing.
  9. yodedude2

    yodedude2 Supporting Member

    this is a concept i'm mulling over: if forgiveness is freedom, then forgiveness is inherently a selfish act.
  10. sneha1965


    Nov 7, 2007
    Yes, there is benefit for the forgiver but not to the exclusion of the receiver.
  11. MatticusMania

    MatticusMania LANA! HE REMEMBERS ME!

    Sep 10, 2008
    Pomona, SoCal
    Eh, it could be perceived that way, however, I dont think all of the things a person can do for themselves are inherently selfish. A selfish act is defined by lacking consideration for others, not necessarily doing something for oneself. Forgiving someone, even if its done for oneself, doesnt have to lack consideration for others.

    That sums up what I was saying fairly well.
  12. That kind of forgiveness makes headlines because it is so unusual.

    I think the reaction to a tragedy is the personal decision of the victims and their families, and for the comfort of their souls and consciences, and none of us can say one reaction is better than another.

    I have chosen to both forgive, and to not forgive, over the course of my life. I do not feel guilty, or superior, about my decisions either way.
  13. HaMMerHeD


    May 20, 2005
    Norman, OK, USA
    Hm. Better people than me. I don't forgive or forget, nor do I seek forgiveness, and I have no use for faith. Of course, I also don't trust anyone or anything, so I can't remember the last time I was in a position in need of my forgiveness.
  14. MatticusMania

    MatticusMania LANA! HE REMEMBERS ME!

    Sep 10, 2008
    Pomona, SoCal
    Also, sometimes the hardest person to forgive can be the self.
  15. sneha1965


    Nov 7, 2007
    Phalex are you listening? ;)
  16. duff beer

    duff beer

    Dec 2, 2007
    I guess I'm in the minority, but I doubt I would consider forgiving someone that killed my child.

    Further to that, I don't believe the forgiveness of the parents should have any bearing on the sentence. Although forgiveness was offered by family members, but it doesn't lessen the severity of the crime, and the dead people are not there to speak for themselves.
  17. slobake

    slobake resident ... something Supporting Member

    Ah, he we go down the rabbit hole. :p
  18. bassinplace


    Dec 1, 2008
    They are very empathetic people who loved their son and don't want the result of his death to be yet another life wasted. They realize the defendant's actions were not malicious or strictly intentional. He is a young boy who made a foolish mistake.

    They can somehow through their grief still understand and accept that. I can understand their reasoning. I doubt I would react in the same way if I were in there shoes, but I can understand it. When the chips are down is when you see how good people really are and these people seem pretty great.
  19. slobake

    slobake resident ... something Supporting Member

    I can't say without a doubt that I would be able to do it either. But I hope I could for my own peace of mind. Some things are hard to know unless I experience it.
  20. BawanaRik


    Mar 6, 2012
    New Jersey