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Found this funny but true!

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by rtslinger, Mar 11, 2014.

  1. kcole4001


    Oct 7, 2009
    Nova Scotia
    Good one!
    We're all definitely WAY undercharging!
  2. BboogieXVII


    Feb 4, 2013
    The public can't tell good music from trashy most of the time. Hence the pay problem. However they can usually tell if their pipes are leaking or not!

    I suggest if you aren't getting paid enough per gig, get a day job as a plumber and don't worry about the gigging money. Not many people will really care.
  3. There's one in every crowd isn't there?
  4. I've heard and retold the story many times,
    what I like to call...

    Picasso, the Patron and the Poultry Painting

    A patron of the arts approaches Picasso to commission a painting of a chicken. Picasso agrees and a price is settled upon and paid.

    A month goes by, and the eager patron asks for the painting. Picasso says it's not ready yet, come back later.

    Three months wile away, the Patron suggests the painting might be ready. Picasso says not so, to wait.

    Half-a-year has passed since the commission and the patron enquires about the painting. Not yet, indicates Picasso.

    A year on and the artwork continues to be shunted into the unforeseeable future by Picasso to the dismay of the patron.

    Two years take their toll on the patron, but Picasso seems to have toiled not.

    Three years drag by, then four and further, more... The painting has not been produced by Picasso and the patron is piqued.

    Impatiently, the patron approaches Picasso right in his studio and demands the painting or the funds to be repaid. Picasso takes a small blank canvas, dips a brush in pigment, and with a few masterful strokes presents the painting.

    Astonished and angry the Patron proclaims: "I paid considerably for something you could've done in three minutes!?!"

    Picasso calmly counters "No" and shows the patron chicken upon chickens – charcoal sketches, pencil doodles, ink drawings, metal etchings, clay sculptings and more... "It has taken me years to be able to learn how and prepare to paint your chicken. Good day, I must get back to work."

    Here's a short variation of the story.

    Most music patrons see only our time on the bandstand, without having witnessed the toil of practice, the regiment of rehearsals, the efforts of laden travel ... That and given the current cost of a recording (MP3, CD or what-have-you) or hiring a DJ, it's no wonder they fail to see live music's value.
  5. kcole4001


    Oct 7, 2009
    Nova Scotia
    Well, if it's ALL about the money, why the heck are we wasting our time playing at all?
    Better off being some scumbag investment crook and rip off well-to-do old ladies.

    Geez, this is still the humor section isn't it?
    Or have we gotten all PC here like everywhere else?

  6. Sneakypete


    Jul 22, 2009
    Could you pay a photographer just for the 1/125 second the shutter is open? If cameras still have shutters.
  7. The Davil

    The Davil

    Aug 13, 2009
    You're not paying for shutter speed, you're paying for the F-stop.
  8. Milk


    Sep 16, 2013
    Montreal, Canada
    Considering Picasso's style i'm not sure that would be his approach. I mean that, it's not like he's into realism.
  9. I agree. So substitute whatever artist's name you want instead of "Picasso". Better yet, make it generic "The Famous Artist".

    Nowadays, everyone's a comedian. And a photographer. And a writer. And a moviemaker...

    It's true, just ask the experts at TB. :p