How to fire someone from a band

[willgroove2]

I have been fired the wrong way;via email on the eve of a tour,and I have been fired the right way.I was involved with a recording project as a session musician,the band that was put together for the sessions was amazing but definatly came from different cliques.The sessions went well and the band was asked to be the backing band for the live performances,everybody agreed but the drummer who had other commitments and thats where the trouble started.Everybody ,including myself, had a drummer in mind.The decision was made to have auditions.Ultimately A drummer was picked who was recommended by one of the keyboardist,the guitarist who was the MD didn't like that at all and was not shy about letting everybody,including the artist and her management know.We did several shows and the situation got worst every gig with a lot of arguing after every gig.Finally after the last gig of the first part of the tour we had a meeting and her management asked us about the problems then asked to speak to us individually.I was asked my take on the situation and and my real opinion and to be frank I punked out a little and didn't say what I really thought because I didn't know what way they were going(lesson learned ;always tell the truth tactfully)I was then told that they were going to go in a different direction for the rest of the tour and I would be paid for half of the dates so I did get some money from it.Later I found out they fired the whole band but I did end up working for them again and one of her managers told me they just decided to clean house because they wanted a more positive vibe.The thing I appreciated about the process was that they pulled everybody away individually and asked them questions as opposed to doing in front of everybody plus the artist herself called me (we had never talked more that 5-10 min before that)afterward and made sure I was ok.It sucked getting fired but it was done in a professional way.

 

[IanStephenson]

Other drummers do that? Ha. That is a crappy thing when its live. To top it off my last drummer would not got out and buy/make a stick bag to hold other sticks near him. He would chase the stick.

Our drummer has a massive bag of sticks, but drops/breaks so many that he usually ends up chasing sticks by the end of the set - seriously he drops a stick every three or four songs. All is going good, and the hi-hat will just dissapear for a bar while he gets a new stick. He breaks so many that towards the end of the night I sometimes wander round the back of the kit, and pick up the "firewood".

Let's just say I'm reading this thread with interest...

 

[RonChase]

You know...Show biz is not always polite I remember back in the day no one ever worried about my feelings yet here I am in a similar position as you and worried about someones feelings.Back in the day if you sucked you heard it went home improved if you were replaced you were replaced thats show biz I dont know it does get tough when its a friend I want to quit a band and my friends are in it and they are not letting me go so honesty is good but when you are talking to people who are oblivious I say blast good and hard with the truth tell them they rot.I used to feel that I was sick and tired of being the make a wish foundation for the terminally untalented

 

[wallybill]

An Anecdote:
I was in a band that decided they wanted to get their old bass player back. Instead of being honest, they told me the band was breaking up. I told the leader of the band that I had heard they were getting the old bass player and he lied to my face and said that wasn't true, he was done playing and the band was over.
Three or four weeks later and the replacement bass player had booked both his bands on the same night, so the band leader called in a panic, asking me to play the gig. I simply told him that I would show him exactly the same sense of respect and courtesy that he showed me. So I hung up on him.
Simple honesty is better.

 

[awakefie]

introduce them to their replacement next time they show up for rehearsal.

I was that replacement once. I was so upset. They told me their old bass player was moving to NY. I showed up to practice and their old bass player was there. I said, "so where are you moving to in New York."

He got a funny look on his face and said, "I'm not moving." Then the realization hit and he got really made. They hadn't told him.

We both walked out on that band at the same time.

Later on in the week we met to share a beer and talk about what a lousy thing it was for their manager to do.

 

[Marley's Ghost]

Tell them that the band is breaking up, then reform secretly with their replacement.

j/k


Honest upfront communication is the only way. Should take place at a band meeting with everyone present, or bandleader/manager should do it privately.

 

[LaughingGroove]

Tell him that it turns you on when he gets sweaty. He will be so uncomfortable he will quit on his own....job done.

 

[awakefie]

Tell him that it turns you on when he gets sweaty. He will be so uncomfortable he will quit on his own....job done.

What if it doesn't make him uncomfortable. Then you might have a stalker on your hands.

 

[king_xanadu]

no but seriously take the advice from most of the people in this thread

 

[Audiophage]

along with "your ****ing fired, BOB!! YOUR ****ING FIRED!!!! CLEAN OUT YOUR **** OUT OF THE SPACE BOB, YOUR **** FIRED!!"

No need to be redundant, don't want to waste extra words on ex-band members. Haha

 

[scorpionldr]

lol you gotta make sure that those ex-members thoroughly understand.

 

[rokkitt]

hmmmmm

the best would be to be very upfront and honest.


if they cant take that, that is there problem......


you have to do what is right for the direction of the band, and the members in it...

 

[Murder_Worship]

5 words

D00d yews outta da bond

 

[ZonGuy]

I was fired from my first band (I had been playing bass for a month). I still remember the sting. Hence, my take on it:

If it is for plainly unacceptable behaviour (late or no shows, chemical incapacitation, theft), warn em once,fire em on the spot the next time.

If it for musical differences or the person is not cutting it, the band leader (not the flunky) needs to break the news and tell em straight up what the problem is, so the guy can go work on the issue or go in another direction. I appreciated the advise I got about my playing when I got fired.

It should be done in person. If the other members of the band of the band want to be there, to reinforce whats said. thats cool.

Let em know at the most convenient location - i.e. the end of a gig, not when he has driven to a practice.

What goes around, comes around.

 

[Krispy]

I was just recently fired ("released" as some prefer) the wrong way and learned a lot from it. I was bitter from making a high-level commitment to a band for over a year and helping to haul them out of some really, crappy rooms and into better paying venues. I was rewarded with lies & deceit by what ultimately turned out to be a group of cowards.

Here's an example of the wrong way to fire a bandmate.

I've moved on and have a nice trio gig much closer to home with a better caliber of people. Karma works in strange ways, so be honest and act with integrity - ALWAYS.

 

[Stumbo]

If its a problem that can be solved ... let them know the problem, let them know that the situation is currently unacceptable and if it continues they will be fired. Offer to help them.

Most problems can be avoided by being proactive.

+10

It also helps to have a band "constitution". Check out: http://www.talkbass.com/forum/showthread.php?t=429034

If you put "fire-able" offenses in your working doc, each band members knows the rules. If you point out missteps to the offending band member, most people will end up firing themselves by not changing or modifying their behavior.

 

[txbasschik]

Do it respectfully and honestly, straight-up, face-to-face. Don't make up b.s. reasons for why. Don't do it over the phone, or by e-mail. Don't do it the night of a gig. Do it at practice, and have the person's stuff packed for them. Help them load, if they need it. Do *not* lie. If you lie, they will never respect or trust you again, and you may regret burning that bridge and gaining a bad reputation. (I promise, you will, if you lie.) If you are honest and respectful, that person will be able to respect you, and will not be able to ever speak against you. Your karma will be clean.

Trust me. My old band did most of the things I just told you not to do. Worst of all, they lied, and went behind my back. I later found out that I'm not the first one they've done this to, nor the last. They have already lost the bassist they worked with behind my back, and they only just fired me/hired him last summer.

Their karma has become very, very black. It has all come back to them in spades, and they brought it all on themselves, by themselves. They have few gigs, and those are not good ones. They have been fired from four venues since they fired me. They can't keep a bassist, and are just using subs. No one will commit to them.

Keep your karma shiny! Be straight-up!!!

Cherie

 

[DudeistMonk]

First off its all in what you call it...for example...here at *company name omitted in case they are watching me, which I am sure they are* we don't call it being fired we call it "being impacted." Nobody here at *company name* ever gets fired/canned/terminated.

Here is how it goes...

"So Bob we have decided to take the band in a different direction, now some people are going to be impacted by this decision, and by some people I mean you."

If anyone in the band refers to Bob as having gotten the axe you must remind them that Bob was impacted and not axed and that others might be impacted for not getting on board with the lingo.

So you see by using proper terminology you can avoid any sense of guilt or accountability in this matter, and possibly do away with all the words that make us feel human at work.

 

[txbasschik]

First off its all in what you call it...for example...here at *company name omitted in case they are watching me, which I am sure they are* we don't call it being fired we call it "being impacted." Nobody here at *company name* ever gets fired/canned/terminated.

Here is how it goes...

"So Bob we have decided to take the band in a different direction, now some people are going to be impacted by this decision, and by some people I mean you."

If anyone in the band refers to Bob as having gotten the axe you must remind them that Bob was impacted and not axed and that others might be impacted for not getting on board with the lingo.

So you see by using proper terminology you can avoid any sense of guilt or accountability in this matter, and possibly do away with all the words that make us feel human at work.

All those people who make up double-speak, politically-correct corporate words have a special place in He11 waiting for them. The place where they keep child molesters, and people who talk at the theatre.

Cherie

 

[kelleysdad]

I reciently had to fire a drummer.He was with us a long time and we had become friends. He started missing gigs, we used a replacement who was better (by a lot) and was available. Since it was now apparent we were being held back by the first drummer and he was starting to get real pushy and demanding , the guitar player and I decided he had to go. I called him on the phone because he lived about 20 mikes away and I didn’t feel like driving all the way there to get slugged, and told him I valued his friendship, hoped we could remain friends, didn’t insult him, but we were going to replace him . He said, you don’t treat friends that way, this friendship is over and hung up and that was it. I felt bad about it . The point of it is, no matter what you do, it always gets ugly. If you are going to do it, do it and get it over with.