How would you feel?

[portpc]

This either bothers me or I could care less, I can't decide which?..

If you had a working trio that where the (2) principals had been together for six years.

You normally book 80% of the gigs, have an instance where you give the other fellow a lead becuz you are too busy, He books the band in a retirement community & while you are loading in on the facility elevator notice an ad poster on the elevator wall which says: " xxx xxx & his 3 Pc Trio today at 2PM"

In other words he booked the band in his name rather than using our band name.
This fellow 1/2 jokingly refers to the band as "his band" often, (He's 12 years older than me/drummer)

He also has a bad habit of rushing to anyone I speak to at a gig & forces his business card on them when he sees me giving one out...All that does is confuse people.

What is this?.. If we didn't have so much work I'd bolt....

 

[sean_on_bass]

I wouldnt make a huge fuss myself for a retirement community gig. He did dilute your brand a bit by not using the band name(assuming that was done purposefully, we dont really know if the client did this on their own). Also rushing in with his business card is a bit annoying, but its hard to say whether you should bring it up to him or not.

Might just need to not give him the chance to book the gigs. or give him a few pointers if he is going to keep doing so(which may not be received well if he considers himself in charge).

Hard to say if you should intervene or let things simmer without knowing the guys personality. It sounds like this is the first time for this stuff happening, so i might let it slide until it became a pattern.

 

[Stumbo]

He's introducing himself to your contacts in case you leave the group.

Also, he's possibly jealous of your ability to get gigs and is disrespecting you.

 

[ak56]

So, you are a member of band YYYYY.

He books xxx xxx & his 3 Pc Trio.

Sounds to me like you and the drummer could just stand aside and watch his one-man trio try to handle the gig, since you are not part of that band. Maybe he'd get the message.

Or maybe just play the gig, and talk to him afterwards.

 

[craigie]

Squid pro bro: when you see him give a card you give yourself as well. You can both get to know the contacts. Just have a discussion able how to best present yourselves.

 

[Ox Boris]

This either bothers me or I could care less, I can't decide which?

What's to decide? You just described the same feeling twice.

 

[LowNloud1]

Maybe a little passive/aggressive or simply a joke on his part? It's hard to gauge his motivation unless you communicate directly. Sounds like a learning opportunity.

 

[gln1955]

Band drama, for the folks in that thread who don't know what it means.

 

[socialleper]

This either bothers me or I could care less, I can't decide which?..

If you had a working trio that where the (2) principals had been together for six years.

You normally book 80% of the gigs, have an instance where you give the other fellow a lead becuz you are too busy, He books the band in a retirement community & while you are loading in on the facility elevator notice an ad poster on the elevator wall which says: " xxx xxx & his 3 Pc Trio today at 2PM"

In other words he booked the band in his name rather than using our band name.
This fellow 1/2 jokingly refers to the band as "his band" often, (He's 12 years older than me/drummer)

He also has a bad habit of rushing to anyone I speak to at a gig & forces his business card on them when he sees me giving one out...All that does is confuse people.

What is this?.. If we didn't have so much work I'd bolt....

It sounds like you are being a little overly sensitive here. Everyone refers to what they are working on as "my band."
Based on what you've posted, this sounds like a cover\events bands. You guys are all hired guns that hustle every second of every day. Is it really surprising to you that someone is hustling?

 

[BassFishingInAmerica]

He didn't even use the name of your band? This bugs me, and I'm not even part of the band.

 

[DavC]

did you get paid .. ?? do you get paid at the end of the gig no matter who got it ... ??

if the answer is 'yes' ... then i'd just chill ... let the 'control freak' play his games and ignore his silly childish crap .. !

 

[pwhalen]

Next time you book the gig, bill it as (Band Name) featuring (You) and (third member). See how he likes it.

Or just cut to the chase and throat punch him...

 

[ThePresident777]

This either bothers me or I could care less, I can't decide which?..

If you had a working trio that where the (2) principals had been together for six years.

You normally book 80% of the gigs, have an instance where you give the other fellow a lead becuz you are too busy, He books the band in a retirement community & while you are loading in on the facility elevator notice an ad poster on the elevator wall which says: " xxx xxx & his 3 Pc Trio today at 2PM"

In other words he booked the band in his name rather than using our band name.
This fellow 1/2 jokingly refers to the band as "his band" often, (He's 12 years older than me/drummer)

He also has a bad habit of rushing to anyone I speak to at a gig & forces his business card on them when he sees me giving one out...All that does is confuse people.

What is this?.. If we didn't have so much work I'd bolt....

It would make me start thinking of the many ways I could covertly and overtly make it clear to him that it's not his band.

 

[travep]

No...I wouldn't be cool w that. If he is renaming the band without your knowledge he has some issues. The rest sounds like insecurity. Either way, I can't spend time around someone like that...it would lead to fights. Of course, I play for fun and for income

 

[Pumpkin]

As far as red lines go, I would consider this a fairly big one. The business card thing is annoying and potentially a way to scoop your contacts. I don't know that there's anything to be done about that. The name issue is different. Personally, if I knew in advance I wouldn't play that show unless the billing was fixed. If the show craters because I didn't show, that's his problem- my name wasn't on it.

 

[bherman]

I've been around the block a few times (62 yrs) and I've learned that the best way to deal with any situation (band or otherwise) is to deal straight. Ask him flat out, "not sure I understand - why did you bill us for this job as XXX and his trio rather than the band name?" Then sit back and listen. He'll either have a good explanation ("my aunt Gladys lives there and I wanted to impress her") or he won't in which case it would be appropriate that the 3 of you have a discussion to come to a clear understanding on booking, band billings, etc.

 

[guy n. cognito]

Are you certain that he did this intentionally? Maybe the retirement home did it?

As for the business card thing, I'd ask him to cut it out.

 

[Chicory Blue]

Kill him and assume his identity.

--^@

 

[catcauphonic]

Sounds dumb overall. Double promoting the same band under different names? Rushing over to hand a card WHILE you're engaged with someone?? That's hogwash & balderdash. Time for a sit down to get on the same page regarding etiquette & who you are as a trio.

 

[Spidey2112]

Bring life size cardboard cutouts of you and the drummer to the next gig, with him... tell the guitarist they are new 'business cards' for him to hand out...

... I personally would choose a low paying gig to do this.