I hate birds... help me destroy them all.

[Kwesi]

Ever since so called spring rolled around birds have been landing on my car and dumping all over the passenger and driver side doors and mirrors. If I leave the car there for anything longer than 2 hours the birds get it. I won't call my car the cleanest thing in the world but I can't stand bird crap on it. It seriously makes me want to puke. I tried explaining the situation to my Dad and he basically thinks I'm being a whiny ***** and when I try to park it in a different spot he moves it back. I'm not even parked under a tree and the birds still get me. Our garage is filled to the brim with junk so It's currently impossible to fit a car into either sides and I can't think of much else to stop the barrage of bird junk.

Does anyone have a solution (preferably one that does not involve shotguns and/or explosives ) that has worked for them that they wouldn't mind passing to me?

 

[hover]

No real solution except to not park where they are.

You can't just kill them...you could get and train a Falcon, or get a huge vacuum like NickTheBassist (and teach them a lesson) but short of those things,

Buy a car cover.
Or call Clean House and get that chick to get rid of the clutter and you all can bond as a family through the process and get free stuff.

 

[elpezpr]

I hate them as well!!!

 

[James Hart]

I like birds... I have a few feeders and houses on my property.

you could always buy a cover

 

[Absentia]

Thinking your dads right.
**** happens

get a bucket and a sponge and get to werk.

 

[Joe Gress]

Contact NTB.

 

[Bruce Lindfield]

Yeah it's funny how Dad's are so often right!

When you become of independent of them - that's when you get the right to have an opinion...

 

[Kwesi]

Thanks for the support , lol. I was thinking that maybe a feeder would distract them away from the car...




...Then I could pick them off with a BB gun . But, In all seriousness would a fake owl and a feeder help any? I have both I just haven't put them to use yet.

 

[TallLankyBastyd]

Yeah it's funny how Dad's are so often right!

When you become of independent of them - that's when you get the right to have an opinion...

And then you lose them again two days after the wedding when you move out of your parents house into your wife's apartment.

...the birds are the least of your problems!

 

[Happynoj]

Better go and find your vacuum cleaner...

 

[MakiSupaStar]

You could always send a message back to the bird commander by crapping on the head of one of his chicks.

 

[bassteban]

Move into your in-laws' place and you'll completely forget the birds.

 

[El Beardo]

 

[MakiSupaStar]

 

[RicPlaya]

I feed the birds at my house too

Yeah your being whiney..nature is cool, humans are hard on things and plants and amimals is definatley affected by us. Not that I am some huge tree hugger, but be nice to the birds..they are cool. So you get a little poop on your car, when it rains it's gone anyway.

 

[cheezewiz]

Here's another vote for your Dad.

 

[MakiSupaStar]

You could always get a job and get your own place with a covered parking space.

 

[middy]

Thanks for the support , lol. I was thinking that maybe a feeder would distract them away from the car...




...Then I could pick them off with a BB gun . But, In all seriousness would a fake owl and a feeder help any? I have both I just haven't put them to use yet.

A feeder would just draw more birds.

A fake owl might work unless the problem birds are crows or jays, they're too smart for that kind of thing.

 

[RicPlaya]

What kind of car do you drive?

 

[Joe Gress]

Don't do a feeder. It will attract more.