Just found out my band was...

[Joedog]

Wow! I don't blame you for leaving, BUT.....! Hopefully you have learned that communication (in all relationships) is crucial. Before I commit to ANY project, I ask a LOT of questions. I strive to prevent the kind of problems you ran into. I'm sure at this point you understand that concept.

 

[micguy]

I play in churches. Some of the musicians in places I play at get paid (often someone gets paid because they're desparate for someone last minute), most don't. I'm not entirely certain who gets paid, and I personally don't care, but I know up front, I'm a volunteer. I've even had people offer to pay me; for me it's simpler to politely decline the money. I really like playing music without any money involved - things are so much simpler. Obviously, other folks approach things differently, and that's fine.

Nothing wrong with playing for (or not for) money, but..people should be up front about whatever the deal is. If the bandleader doesn't want the band to play for money, he should be telling people, before auditions even begin, that that's the deal. If he expects there will be some free gigs (and some paying), he should be up front about that. The thing that's upsetting is when expectations are not met.

Your learning from this: Next time, ask the question up front. Nicely, of course, but ask, so that, even if a band leader isn't being proactive about the issue, you at least get your expectations and his or hers closer. Yes, ideally you shouldn't have to ask, but..yes, practically, you should.

 

[JaseyT]

Well if you had a good band that was worth getting paid why didn't you book some gigs? At least the pro bono gigs for friends and family would have got you all playing. Being the "bandleader" of a startup bar band is a thankless job that is more a labour of love.

Edit: reading back on it, my post was harsh and wrong. My apologies. Parties yes, play for free, it's a party. Business associates, no way. Getting crazy about a free "show"? That's just being an asshat to manipulate you.

A little slower next time, there, Trigger.

 

[Joe Nerve]

No. I can't be the first one to not side with the OP....

Really?

6 months rehearsing with the band and that's the first you hear of the idea you'll be playing for free? With other gigs lines up, too? I have to put this one on you, as I believe you're as responsible as the BL - who is entitled to play for free if that's what he wants to do. Bailing on a gig 4 days before is also not a cool thing to do, regardless of the circumstances. At the very least, quit but play the gig.

I know that sounds harsh, but I think if we want things to be different in the future we need to be objective and look at our part in what's not going right. Just being honest, and hopefully supportive.

 

[electracoyote]

no interest for playing in bars, events, etc with a monetary retribution. I mean, I didn't want to get rich playing in bars, I guess nobody does, but that was a weird band.

I'm still wondering how this "only freebies for friends and family" policy escaped your knowledge. Maybe more conversations and questions were in order sooner in the process? You needed to be more pro-active?

 

[DirtDog]

I made a mistake of joining a band once and not getting the details on gig payments and how the money was split. It was 100% my fault for not asking, and when I found out.....

Yep. This. Get the details, in writing preferably.

 

[kesslari]

And here I thought that you were going to say that your band was going on a group date with Paris Hilton.

 

[RoadRanger]

I can't believe how I put up with that for that long

I'm always amused when someone says they were wasting their time playing in a band going nowhere. I'm betting you'd not be where you are now ability-wise without those 5 years .

 

[noagreement]

I get pissed when my band leader doesn't negotiate beer into the pay. Seriously!

It sounds like it was a good learning experience for the OP. The $$ part is only part of the band's priorities, but communicating basic stuff like pay is absolutely essential for any kind of trust / relationship with the other band mates.

 

[baileyboy]

Just found out my band was formed to play for free!

Hell no.

...the BL claimed that they talked about it and everybody agreed to that.

"everybody"??? You didn't.

...I asked if we were being paid and how much...said we were not that good so we couldn't charge nothing...

At this point I would have told him I was not playing without pay, then walked.

...had to get paid for our work, $1 or $1000, etc, amount doesn't matter.

Please do NOT negotiate pay for future gigs.

Any similar experiences to anyone out there?

No.

 

[Carl Hillman]

You're curious.
Okay, I didn't want to make a long string in the tittle so here it is: Just found out my band was formed to play for free!
Yes, you read it right. Probably I didn't go to that early rehearsal but the BL claimed that they talked about it and everybody agreed to that. I know I wouldn't accept it. We had a gig (non paying big event) this Sunday for a friend of BL. Probably he was being paid behind our back, I'm not sure, but he was giving us too much pressure to give an excellent show, we had to learn new songs in a short time, etc. Even if we were given a good amount, we were asked for too much. I asked if we were being paid and how much and he got like crazy, Are you serious?!!! YOU NEED TO BE 100% READY FOR THE SHOW!!! (which I was)
He said we were not that good so we couldn't charge nothing, so we had to play pro bono. I responded we were good, and we had to get paid for our work, $1 or $1000, etc, amount doesn't matter. Got into a big argument. It ended up with me quitting the band, just 4 days before the event. Oh, he had some other events lined up for us. Funny how those were for his friends birthdays, business friends, relatives, etc.
The music in the 4 sets we worked on the last 6 months was very good. I liked it. But no interest for playing in bars, events, etc with a monetary retribution. I mean, I didn't want to get rich playing in bars, I guess nobody does, but that was a weird band. Any similar experiences to anyone out there?

Ya gotta pay the band.

 

[HertzWhenIPlay]

I love to play live and do it for free as often as I can, as to me, it is far better than not playing at all. I even play with myself as often as I can. Yup, you read correctly...nobody pays me to do that either.

 

[MichelD]

50 years now since I bought my first guitar and 49 since I first played in a band. We were in an isolated area and could not find a bass guitar so we took a Harmony Meteor and took the high strings off and turned all the knobs on the guitar and amp to "bass." I haven't invested that much time in learning my craft as well as $ for geqar to play anything but a close friend's party for nothing.

 

[capnsandwich]

I'm always amused when someone says they were wasting their time playing in a band going nowhere. I'm betting you'd not be where you are now ability-wise without those 5 years .

Can't say that I didn't learn from them but I sure learned a lot more from the 2 bands I'm currently in as well as the multiple churches I play at. Plus, the stuff I had to put up with made it not worth the time.

 

[Florinda4]

Man, what a drag. Life's to short to waste on jerks like this BL.

I have a Personal Rule scorched into my brain from multiple bad experiences, mostly caused by my own stupidity. Rule says:

Before commiting to any gig, or any work leading up to it, ask two questions, at the very least:
- who's in the group?
- what's it pay, if anything? Might be zero$, paid, food, beer tokens, fresh produce, 16-year single malt scotch, room & board, some combination thereof... but need to know what compensation, exactly.

There will be other questions, like location, transport, etc., but often those aren't settled yet when I get a call, and the BL understandably needs a commitment ASAP.

Part I of my personal rule is I can't commit without at least those answers.
Part II is that once I commit (unless something REALLY dire intervenes), I will be there. Don't like leaving bandmates in the lurch on short notice.

I probably would have done this gig, but would not work with the jerk BL or his friend again, and would lobby the rest of the band and everyone else I know to do the same.

 

[pglaser01]

You guys weren't getting paid, but he absolutely was, and I'll bet it was substantial too... Good on you for sticking him. I'd have waited until 4 hours before the show. Douchebag....

You know I thought this right away as well...but after seeing all of the gigs were for HIS close contacts....now I'm thinking this reeks of "I desperately want to impress these people" or "I need validation"

 

[oldrocker]

No. I can't be the first one to not side with the OP....

Really?

6 months rehearsing with the band and that's the first you hear of the idea you'll be playing for free? With other gigs lines up, too? I have to put this one on you, as I believe you're as responsible as the BL - who is entitled to play for free if that's what he wants to do. Bailing on a gig 4 days before is also not a cool thing to do, regardless of the circumstances. At the very least, quit but play the gig.

I know that sounds harsh, but I think if we want things to be different in the future we need to be objective and look at our part in what's not going right. Just being honest, and hopefully supportive.

Same question asked in post #5. I haven't seen any updates from the OP??

So in the 6 months you were involved with this band the talk of paying gigs never came up?

 

[Joe Nerve]

Same question asked in post #5. I haven't seen any updates from the OP??

Guilty of not reading entire posts.

 

[pjbassist]

Certainly not the same as playing for free like the OP, but I found out this week that the BL of our Wedding/Corporate Events band wants incorporate the band and 1099 everyone in the band at the end of the year!

He is a musician exclusively and claims he wants to create a "legitimate" income stream on paper so that he can apply for a mortgage. My response was "So I get to fork over 25% of my earnings so that you can apply for a mortgage?"

We're having a band meeting to discuss...I can't wait.

 

[57pbass]

Playing for free is okay on certain occasions.. but to do it on a regular basis makes it bad for the working musician..
Why pay me when you guys do it for free.