Let's spread some musical misinformation

[Jay2U]

Musicians have difficulty with email because they have only 12 keys on their computers.

In the near future musicians will be way ahead, however. As soon as quantum computers are commercially available, those who understand string theory will be a quantum leap ahead.

 

[PillO]

In the near future musicians will be way ahead, however. As soon as quantum computers are commercially available, those who understand string theory will be a quantum leap ahead.

Those who depend upon music royalties should fear quantum computers. Once they are practical, it is only a matter of time until a quantum computer writes every possible note combination, thereby writing every possible song.

 

[Jay2U]

Those who depend upon music royalties should fear quantum computers. Once they are practical, it is only a matter of time until a quantum computer writes every possible note combination, thereby writing every possible song.

As well as performing those songs with every possible instrument, in every possible key. Quantum computers will claim the rights and simultaneously enforce the copyright law. There's no chance to escape. We're doomed, we're doomed....

 

[Jay2U]

The holy grail for basses isn't the wood, isn't the strings, isn't the pickup, isn't the scale length. No, it's the ratio of the tuning gears. 1 to 20, no more no less, is the golden ratio that'll make the bass stand out.

 

[sissy kathy]

The holy grail for basses isn't the wood, isn't the strings, isn't the pickup, isn't the scale length. No, it's the ratio of the tuning gears. 1 to 20, no more no less, is the golden ratio that'll make the bass stand out.

...and heavy tuners enhance the tone.

 

[PillO]

The holy grail for basses isn't the wood, isn't the strings, isn't the pickup, isn't the scale length. No, it's the ratio of the tuning gears. 1 to 20, no more no less, is the golden ratio that'll make the bass stand out.

3/8" or 1/2"? Or does it matter?

 

[Jay2U]

3/8" or 1/2"? Or does it matter?

Good question, so I Googled it.
Quote from WikiFakia: "...This ratio of 1/20 applies to 1/2" tuning pegs only. For each diameter the ratio can be calculated as follows: 1/(40 x diameter in inches)."

 

[Tom Bomb]

To the utter surprise of many, the euphonium has been revamped by Apple, who now holds all relevant patents. In a stroke of sheer creative genius, they've renamed it the iPhonium™ and incorporated seamless cellular WiFi connectivity, Garage Band, a selfie camera, GPS and an EPIRB beacon, just in case the novice user gets lost in a punk polka or post bop reverie.

 

[jamro217]

It is unwise to play barefoot because of the risk of puncture wounds from debris left by careless bandmates and possible electrocution due to grounding problems. The safest footwear is sandals with white cotton socks.

White is imperative, as dye conducts electricity and the natural (undyed) white socks do not. The risk of electrical shock is greatly reduced. Note: no studies have been done regarding socks of any color and static electricity.

 

[jamro217]

Which brings us back to the washtub bass.

The advent of indoor plumbing was the death knell of the washtub bass. This gave rise to the short lived "Shower Bass". There are no surviving models (they were all recalled and destroyed to eliminate the possibility of drowning while singing). Their only contribution to future models was the use of pearloid (which mimicked the bathroom motif of the day.)

 

[jamro217]

Those who depend upon music royalties should fear quantum computers. Once they are practical, it is only a matter of time until a quantum computer writes every possible note combination, thereby writing every possible song.

Once quantum computers and 3D printers unite we're all doomed.

 

[Jay2U]

Once quantum computers and 3D printers unite we're all doomed.

Nothing we can do, as those computers and printers can reproduce by simply printing working copies of themselves.
There may be one solution. We have to call in experts, to jam the system before this happens.

 

[the harp unstrung]

 

[-Asdfgh-]

The advent of indoor plumbing was the death knell of the washtub bass. This gave rise to the short lived "Shower Bass". There are no surviving models (they were all recalled and destroyed to eliminate the possibility of drowning while singing). Their only contribution to future models was the use of pearloid (which mimicked the bathroom motif of the day.)

Don't forget the Burns Basin Bass.

 

[ZenG]

just in case the novice user gets lost in a punk polka or post bop reverie.

Wait...what??...

We are now Post Bop?

 

[Jay2U]

Djent has been invented to save strings, wood and notes.

 

[zontar]

By not using picks you save the world's supply of various plastics, stone, metal, wood, felt & rubber

 

[Pops OB]

Jaco's been giving me tips and pointers in my basement.

 

[Jay2U]

Jaco's been giving me tips and pointers in my basement.

I know. We always talked about you.

 

[Jay2U]

The true answers to all your metal questions (except for the best pick for metal)