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Midlife Crisis

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#21
HollowBassman said:
Wow Devils Advocate, you really make friends fast!

For what it's worth, I believe you're sincere. Unfortunately, I don't have any advice. Good luck.
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Thanks.

I didn't even do anything here. Putting some honest feelings out there and people start getting all angered and taking attacks. Not sure what's up here. It's clear I'm pushing some buttons in people that they might benefit from taking a look at. :/
 
#22
I spent Wednesday afternoon running around a basketball court, with 30 18-21 chicks chasing after me trying to grope me. It's true. Seriously (I love college). I'm 30, a military veteran, and have been watching people do all kinds of ridiculous things to the music I make. I've also been married the last 7 years. So I know a little bit about what you're talking about.

It's very tempting to be that "*******" guy and just play the field. I've definitely considered it over the years. It's also really tempting to become a statistic, get divorced, and have nothing stopping me from tapping every piece of ass that comes my way.

But I don't do any of that. Why? I'm not entirely sure. For one, I tend to avoid a lot of the drama that I see most of my single friends dealing with. Secondly, I know for a fact that it's REALLY hard to find someone that can put up with your crap and love you for what you are, and is willing to support whatever ridiculous endeavor you pursue. I don't have kids, and my wife and I don't have too many mutual possessions, so it'd be relatively easy to go our separate ways. But I don't have any plans to go that route any time soon.

So I would say...download some porn. Live vicariously through your friends. Grow up a little. You'll never be able to completely tune out the urges, but you can definitely control them.

^^my 2c.
 
#24
Perspective

By your own words, you're fortunate. Great...always keep that in mind and never forget it for a moment.

You're tempted? So what? You always will be. It will never end and there is no escaping temptation. Learn to control it or it will control you.

Frustration? See above. You will always be frustrated by something. Girls, life, pickups, strings, locking with a drummer, soloing over changes (trying to get bass in there somewhere).

So you're tempted and frustrated. Welcome to being a human being my friend. No offense, but you should have figured that out by now, IMO. I've had plenty of opportunities to cheat on a woman I love with total babes too...you're not the first and you won't be the last. Not worth it.

I've had plenty of opportunities to steal and get away with it and it would have benefited me greatly. Not worth it either. It's always easier to take the easy way out. It's also not worth it otherwise it would just be the way and there would never be any question about it at all. There would be no dilemma or moral conflict in the first place. The fact that there is gives you the answer right there...you just don't seem to like the answer.

Input? I'll give you the benefit of the doubt (and there is PLENTY) and assume you're an OK guy. Get some perspective, suck it up and come to grips with the fact that everything has its' price; nothing is free...ever.

You want the benefits or a relationship? It will cost you. You wanna bang all those hot girls? That will cost you too.

Since you're going to have to pay, make it something really worth paying for.

EDIT: MyUsernameHere...best laugh I've had in a while!
 
#28
from said:
Please. The very notion that you think being "chased by girls".... 50 year old man could take constructive criticism. :)
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Wow! You are just so smart, and incredibly insightful! You nailed me. I guess I should go grab a rope now and just be done with myself.

You must have lots and lots of friends.

I feel more sorry for you than I do me right now. I'll get over my struggles, yours' seem pretty dyed in the wool. :/
 
#31
you seem to have a mama, not a girlfriend. you also seem to need a mama. be sure to tell that to all the hot chicks who are chasing you....

p.s. fwiw, you've become one of "those" men...

p.p.s. i would NOT hit that....
 
#32
That living on the edge will just give you a hard time regretting what you could have with your girlfriend. Stay with her and regretting a little of fun you missed will be nothing compare to how much you have to lose. Good luck man.
 
#34
You've got too much time on your hands. If you like the chick and she's not into opening the relationship up, then break up with her. This is why prostitutes are in business. You pay them to leave with no strings attached. Still, without considering the risk for disease, you only live once. But it seems to me like you're in a pattern of monogamy and realizing that you'd like to explore a different pattern. If you choose this path make sure it's with your chicks blessing. If not, break up with her and then pursue the tail. I've always been envious of dogs when they chase their tail. They seem like they're having so much fun, until they finally bite down. If I could chase my own tail and lick my own balls I'd never leave the house. If you don't like any of my advice, I suggest you invest in an asian porn website membership.
 
#40
Guy doesn't seem so bad to me. So he screwed around a little on his profile, so what. There's been some much more obvious trolling going on around here in the past and y'all rag on this guy? C'mon...

True or not, I don't see him trying to insult anybody, and I certainly don't see him lashing out at our common instrument or anything.

To the OP, I'm not so far in years as you are, nor have I really held down a truly lasting relationship (nothing over a year and a half) so I can't speak from experience, but it seems to me sticking with the sugar mama would be the wiser decision. :D
 
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