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Monumentally bad decisions

#81
Edward G. said:
^^^
Amen. When anyone says they 'wouldn't change a thing I ever did in my life', I tend to not believe that person. There's a whole lot I'd like to do over and do right, and it only makes sense.

Not that it matters now. You make the best of what you have...and be grateful things didn't turn out worse.

Because it could always be worse.

But a lot of good things happened too.
Click to expand...

I can list off all sorts of things that I could've done better if I had to do them again, but:

1) Still don't consider any of them to be monumental

2) I only know how to do them better today because I learned from messing them up the first time.
 
#85
I've made some bad moves in my 36 years. I have wasted a lot of time on the wrong women, dropped out of college, had a car repo'd, financially ruined myself, bought a house at the very peak of "the bubble" and lost about 80 grand on it (I'll be digging out of that one for a while) I broke my tailbone twice and suffer with the chronic pain of a poorly healed pelvis, I've crashed a few cars, crashed a few motorcycles, bailed on too many bands, drank way too much booze, never chased my dream, said a lot of stuff that I wish I never did, always feel like I've let my family down with my good intentions over the years. Frankly there have been more than a few situations where I was luck to get home alive and in one piece...
But you know what? I've been very happily married to the love of my life for 9 years next week, I have two amazing little boys who are the best part of my day, every day!
Sure, my job is a pressure cooker, this house needs more work than I will ever get to and financially I'm just treading water. But right now I feel pretty good... I'm good.
-John
 
#86
I've made a lot of decisions - some good, some bad, some big, some small. One way or another, I ended up where I am right now because of those decisions. I have a wife I'm madly in love with, two amazing daughters, and a comfortable lifestyle. Looking back at my journey, I can see how things that seemed like small decisions at the time have made a huge difference in the road I have traveled.
 
#87
Unrepresented said:
I can list off all sorts of things that I could've done better if I had to do them again, but:

1) Still don't consider any of them to be monumental

2) I only know how to do them better today because I learned from messing them up the first time.
Click to expand...

Same here.

Bad decision of the day: Doing 80 mph on the freeway, got a speeding ticket.
 
#88
jweber76 said:
I've made some bad moves in my 36 years. I have wasted a lot of time on the wrong women, dropped out of college, had a car repo'd, financially ruined myself, bought a house at the very peak of "the bubble" and lost about 80 grand on it (I'll be digging out of that one for a while) I broke my tailbone twice and suffer with the chronic pain of a poorly healed pelvis, I've crashed a few cars, crashed a few motorcycles, bailed on too many bands, drank way too much booze, never chased my dream, said a lot of stuff that I wish I never did, always feel like I've let my family down with my good intentions over the years. Frankly there have been more than a few situations where I was luck to get home alive and in one piece...
But you know what? I've been very happily married to the love of my life for 9 years next week, I have two amazing little boys who are the best part of my day, every day!
Sure, my job is a pressure cooker, this house needs more work than I will ever get to and financially I'm just treading water. But right now I feel pretty good... I'm good.
-John
Click to expand...

Great post John. Glad to hear your life is good now.
 
#93
Unrepresented said:
I can list off all sorts of things that I could've done better if I had to do them again, but:

1) Still don't consider any of them to be monumental

2) I only know how to do them better today because I learned from messing them up the first time.
Click to expand...

Trouble with that is that learning by 'trial and error' takes way longer than preparing oneself to be smart from the get-go. And yes, there is always the existential truth that we all are the sum total of all the decisions we've made as well as NOT made, but direct experience can be brutal.

The truly enlightened among us learn more and get further by internalizing other people's screw-ups, so they don't have to make the same mistakes that led others into deep doo doo.

But how many of us really have that much sense?
 
#94
Edward G. said:
Trouble with that is that learning by 'trial and error' takes way longer than preparing oneself to be smart from the get-go. And yes, there is always the existential truth that we all are the sum total of all the decisions we've made as well as NOT made, but direct experience can be brutal.

The truly enlightened among us learn more and get further by internalizing other people's screw-ups, so they don't have to make the same mistakes that led others into deep doo doo.

But how many of us really have that much sense?
Click to expand...

You can't internalize others' success and failure until you've had similar experiences. Life takes exposure. Learn as much as you can from the little stings to avoid the giant bites life will offer you.
 
#95
I'm not buying into this "I have to fail myself to know what's successful" idea. I'm perfectly happy watching someone else make a mistake that I was going to make and learn from them.

-Mike
 
#96
I had foot surgery to fix a limp that never bothered me. I was physically and mentally unprepared for it, and it sent me into "Plath-was-right-it-is-like-a-bell-jar" depression. Got into a bad coping skill for the depression. I'm over the depression now, but I live in constant fear that of messing up my ankle because I let others run my life.
 
#97
Casting Thunder said:
I had foot surgery to fix a limp that never bothered me. I was physically and mentally unprepared for it, and it sent me into "Plath-was-right-it-is-like-a-bell-jar" depression. Got into a bad coping skill for the depression. I'm over the depression now, but I live in constant fear that of messing up my ankle because I let others run my life.
Click to expand...

Hey I can relate to this. See my OP.
 
#98
MJ5150 said:
I'm not buying into this "I have to fail myself to know what's successful" idea. I'm perfectly happy watching someone else make a mistake that I was going to make and learn from them.

-Mike
Click to expand...

I can guarantee you still remember that bike accident you had as a kid, or the time you burned yourself on the stove after your mom warned you to leave it alone. That all goes into giving you a reference point to go by so you know the consequences later.
 
#99
Edward G. said:
Trouble with that is that learning by 'trial and error' takes way longer than preparing oneself to be smart from the get-go. And yes, there is always the existential truth that we all are the sum total of all the decisions we've made as well as NOT made, but direct experience can be brutal.

The truly enlightened among us learn more and get further by internalizing other people's screw-ups, so they don't have to make the same mistakes that led others into deep doo doo.

But how many of us really have that much sense?
Click to expand...

hotstove.jpg
 

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