An all-accordion band played a New Years' Eve gig. The owner asked if they could do it again next New Years. They said "Sure, Can we leave our equipment?"
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musician Joke time!
- Thread starter gearslut:)
- Start date
I heard a different version:
How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?
50, 1 to hold the lightbulb and 49 to drink until the room spins
Commreman
Faith, Family, Fitness, and Frets
did you hear about the folksinger that was convicted of murder?
The jury gave him the acoustic chair.......
The jury gave him the acoustic chair.......
I just made up an alternate version:
Q: Why do pirates make such successful lead guitarists?
A: Because all they can play are arrrgh-peggios.
How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
1....1.....1,2...2...1,2....1.1...1
1....1.....1,2...2...1,2....1.1...1
why do sound engineers always say 1,2,1,2,2,1? Because if they can make it to 3 they're over-qualified for the job.
why do sound engineers always say 1,2,1,2,2,1? Because on 3 you have to lift.
why do sound engineers always say 1,2,1,2,2,1? Because on 3 you have to lift.
Yep, guitarists spend half their lives tuning their guitars and the other half playing out of tune
Bobby comes home from school and says: "Mommy, I can keep a better beat than anyone in the 3rd grade."
Mommy:"That's because you're a drummer, Bobby."
Bobby comes home the next day and says:" Mommy, I can count to 4 better than anyone else in the 3rd grade."
Mommy:" that's because you're a drummer, Bobby"
Bobby comes home the next day and says:" Mommy, I'm the tallest person in the third grade."
Mommy:" That's because you're 23, Bobby."
Mommy:"That's because you're a drummer, Bobby."
Bobby comes home the next day and says:" Mommy, I can count to 4 better than anyone else in the 3rd grade."
Mommy:" that's because you're a drummer, Bobby"
Bobby comes home the next day and says:" Mommy, I'm the tallest person in the third grade."
Mommy:" That's because you're 23, Bobby."
- Jul 8, 2009
- 1,612
- 11
- Disclosures
- A&R, Soulless Corporation Records
I didn't claim it was the best ever or an origional creation, just noticed it hadn't made it into the thread yet 
I've heard most of these before
I've heard most of these before
A girl went out on a date with a trumpet player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was it?
Did his embouchure make him a great kisser?"
"Nah," the first girl replied. "That dry, tight, tiny little pucker; it was no fun at all."
The next night she went out with a tuba player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?"
"Ugh!" the first girl exclaimed. "Those huge, rubbery, blubbery, slobbering slabs of meat; oh, it was just gross!"
The next night she went out with a French horn player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?"
"Well," the first girl replied, "his kissing was just so-so; but I loved the way he held me!"
Did his embouchure make him a great kisser?"
"Nah," the first girl replied. "That dry, tight, tiny little pucker; it was no fun at all."
The next night she went out with a tuba player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?"
"Ugh!" the first girl exclaimed. "Those huge, rubbery, blubbery, slobbering slabs of meat; oh, it was just gross!"
The next night she went out with a French horn player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?"
"Well," the first girl replied, "his kissing was just so-so; but I loved the way he held me!"
