A reporter is interviewing a lead singer and asks how many musicians are in his band.
He replies they have 4 musicians and a drummer.
He replies they have 4 musicians and a drummer.
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musician Joke time!
- Thread starter gearslut:)
- Start date
all my favorites have already been said except
how many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
10. one to change it and 9 more to sit around saying how neil peart would have done it better.
how many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
10. one to change it and 9 more to sit around saying how neil peart would have done it better.
- Jul 8, 2009
- 1,612
- 11
- Disclosures
- A&R, Soulless Corporation Records
Q:How many jazz bassists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A:Man, forget the changes; just play!
A:Man, forget the changes; just play!
I hope these aren't repeats:
Q: What's the difference between a frog and a trombone player going into a club?
A: The frog has a gig.
Q: What's perfect pitch with a banjo?
A: Tossing it into the dumpster without hitting the sides.
Q: What do you do when drummer knocks on your door?
A: Give him the money and take the pizza.
Q: How do you know a singer is knocking at your front door?
A: They're coming in late and lost the key.
Q: What's the range of a banjo?
A: About 50 ft. with a tailwind.
Q: What do you call a guitarist without a girlfriend?
A: Homeless.
Q: What's the difference between a frog and a trombone player going into a club?
A: The frog has a gig.
Q: What's perfect pitch with a banjo?
A: Tossing it into the dumpster without hitting the sides.
Q: What do you do when drummer knocks on your door?
A: Give him the money and take the pizza.
Q: How do you know a singer is knocking at your front door?
A: They're coming in late and lost the key.
Q: What's the range of a banjo?
A: About 50 ft. with a tailwind.
Q: What do you call a guitarist without a girlfriend?
A: Homeless.
- Jul 8, 2009
- 1,612
- 11
- Disclosures
- A&R, Soulless Corporation Records
- Jul 8, 2009
- 1,612
- 11
- Disclosures
- A&R, Soulless Corporation Records
Someone told me this one this morning:
Q. Why are there no salmon in orchestra's?
A. You can't tuna fish.
Q. Why are there no salmon in orchestra's?
A. You can't tuna fish.
ie. empty staves
...and ironically I'm sure 4'33" would most definitely make a guitarist noodle more.
Little Johnny (age 5) suddenly goes up to the piano and lifts the lid. He's never shown any interest before. He hits a few notes, and a few minutes later he's playing some amazing music! His parents send him to a piano teacher to develop his talent.
Piano teacher:"Johnny, I hear you write all your own music. Would you play for me?"
Johnny:"Okay, this one's quite fast."
He plays a powerful complex piece. The teacher is flabbergasted.
Teacher:"Johnny that's amazing!What is that piece called?"
Johnny:"It's called My Dick is Throbbing."
Teacher doesn't believe she heard right, asks him to play some more.
Johnny:"This is a sad one in D minor."
The music is incredibly moving and the Teacher is in tears.
Johnny:"That one's called Bend Over I Wanna See Your Arse."
The teacher decides to discuss the titles later and get on with Johnny's piano and composing development.
A year later he appears at the world's most prestigious competition for young composers. He gets to the final. He goes to the toilet, and then heads onstage. As he walks out, the conductor whispers:"Johnny! Do you know your fly's open and your cock's showing?"
Johnny:" KNOW IT??!! I WROTE IT!!!"
Piano teacher:"Johnny, I hear you write all your own music. Would you play for me?"
Johnny:"Okay, this one's quite fast."
He plays a powerful complex piece. The teacher is flabbergasted.
Teacher:"Johnny that's amazing!What is that piece called?"
Johnny:"It's called My Dick is Throbbing."
Teacher doesn't believe she heard right, asks him to play some more.
Johnny:"This is a sad one in D minor."
The music is incredibly moving and the Teacher is in tears.
Johnny:"That one's called Bend Over I Wanna See Your Arse."
The teacher decides to discuss the titles later and get on with Johnny's piano and composing development.
A year later he appears at the world's most prestigious competition for young composers. He gets to the final. He goes to the toilet, and then heads onstage. As he walks out, the conductor whispers:"Johnny! Do you know your fly's open and your cock's showing?"
Johnny:" KNOW IT??!! I WROTE IT!!!"
What's the difference between a musician and a Mutual Fund?
One will eventually mature and make some money.
What's the difference between a musician and a large Pizza?
A large pizza can feed a family of four.
How can a musician make a million dollars playing?
Start with two million.
What's does a stripper do with her arsehole right before she goes to work?
Drop him off at rehearsal.
What's the difference between a Rock Guitarist and a Jazz Guitarist?
A Rock Guitarist plays four chords to thousands of people....
What do you call a beautiful woman on a keyboard player's arm?
A tattoo.
One will eventually mature and make some money.
What's the difference between a musician and a large Pizza?
A large pizza can feed a family of four.
How can a musician make a million dollars playing?
Start with two million.
What's does a stripper do with her arsehole right before she goes to work?
Drop him off at rehearsal.
What's the difference between a Rock Guitarist and a Jazz Guitarist?
A Rock Guitarist plays four chords to thousands of people....
What do you call a beautiful woman on a keyboard player's arm?
A tattoo.
- Jul 8, 2009
- 1,612
- 11
- Disclosures
- A&R, Soulless Corporation Records
What's the difference between a musician and a Mutual Fund?
One will eventually mature and make some money.
What's the difference between a musician and a large Pizza?
A large pizza can feed a family of four.
How can a musician make a million dollars playing?
Start with two million.
What's does a stripper do with her arsehole right before she goes to work?
Drop him and his drumset off at rehearsal.
What's the difference between a Rock Guitarist and a Jazz Guitarist?
A Rock Guitarist plays four chords to thousands of people....
What do you call a beautiful woman on a keyboard player's arm?
A tattoo.
Fixed
