"My" drummer?

[bassobrutto]

Over the ten years or so I have been visiting this site, it is hard not to notice how often people refer to their bandmates as "my" drummer, "my" guitarist, "my" singer, etc. As a Brit, I would always say "our" drummer, etc., because a band is obviously a "we" not an "I." To my ear, "my" drummer sounds like a kind of servant, someone who shows up to drum for me personally whenever I happen to need a few beats in my life. I click my fingers and he is magically there with me, pounding the skins, whether I am in the woodshed, driving to work, or walking the dog. So why do people talk like this? Is this just America's legendary "rugged individualism" speaking?

 

[StyleOverShow]

Bands are just bass and drums with various acts up front- Pink Floyd guy

“My drummer” came and went as a catch phrase, but like Wendy’s remembers now (Where’s the beef), it comes back.

Jeremy was/is my drummer. We played in a band backing a RnB recording artist of little renown. He understood what I was all about and I had an excellent understanding of his feet and hands. We grooved together, thumped simultaneously and generally had a good time doing it. The singer ‘quit’ the biz and the band broke up. We still keep in touch but live 1,000 miles apart.

 

[LBS-bass]

My drummer just means the drummer in my band, i.e. the band I am in. It is a quicker way to say "the drummer in the band I am in" because THE drummer does not always refer to the band I am in. Context usually helps with this, but not always.

I don't own a drummer. I do work with a drummer who I prefer to play with, and we are in a couple of bands together.

Hope that clears things up.

 

[ArtechnikA]

Is this just America's legendary "rugged individualism" speaking?

U.K. and US are two countries divided by a common language...
There are lots of phrases that are idiomatically different.
'We' tend to view collective nouns as singular, but UK English treats that as plural, for example. "The company is..." as opposed to "The company are..."
IMO, there's a bit of context, as opposed to possession, involved.
I _could_ "the drummer in a project I play with" but it just gets cumbersome.
Saying "My drummer" is shorthand for that, where the specific project is either implied or not significant.
Does not "our drummer" just imply collective ownership?
'Our' tends to imply (to me) that it is a member of a specific project that I should understand in order to fully grasp the significance. (i.e. "Who is this 'Us'")

 

[bassobrutto]

Well, I suppose it depends on whether you think of a band as a unit, as I would, or as just an aggregate of individuals. To my ear, "our" suggests "belonging" to a group, not ownership. It is interesting to me that you assume it suggests ownership.

 

[bassobrutto]

My drummer just means the drummer in my band, i.e. the band I am in. It is a quicker way to say "the drummer in the band I am in" because THE drummer does not always refer to the band I am in. Context usually helps with this, but not always.

I don't own a drummer. I do work with a drummer who I prefer to play with, and we are in a couple of bands together.

Hope that clears things up.

But why not say "our" drummer? I guess what I am getting at is that some people see themselves as component parts of a unit to which they belong, a "we," while others see themselves as individuals who just happen to be playing with a bunch of other individuals.

 

[JRA]

why do people talk like this? Is this just America's legendary "rugged individualism" speaking?

yeah, that's exactly it! TBH: i've used both terms interchangeably, but i get your point and tend to agree with it.

BTW, is your drummer any good?

 

[LBS-bass]

But why not say "our" drummer? I guess what I am getting at is that some people see themselves as component parts of a unit to which they belong, a "we," while others see themselves as individuals who just happen to be playing with a bunch of other individuals.

Because "our" doesn't give you any information about who "we" are. Again, this might be clear from context, but it might not. The drummer that I play with most often is "my" preferred instrumentalist on that instrument, and if I'm not playing with him then it's usually "the" drummer or "their" drummer because I am not technically in those bands.

I play with a bunch of different bands sometimes, and we don't all form a collective to share instrumentalists so there's no "our." Some of these bands are pickup gigs so there's no "we" but if I bring my preferred drummer in for one of those shows it's me and "my drummer" and some other people.

We're splitting hairs here, really, though. It's just a turn of phrase and there's always more than one way to say something. I wouldn't lose sleep over it if I were you.

 

[ArtechnikA]

But why not say "our" drummer?

Because 'our' drummer implies that I should know and/or care who 'us' is.
If I said 'our' drummer, you wouldn't know if I meant the drummer in the blues band, the rock band, or the country band, although saying 'our' make it seem like it matters.
If I say 'my' drummer, it implies 'a' drummer that plays with me where the context in unimportant. If it were important, it would be my responsibility to clarify e.g. 'rock band drummer...'

 

[bassobrutto]

BTW, is your drummer any good?

My dog thinks so! I am not so sure.

 

[4SG]

Does the question "Is this just America's legendary 'rugged individualism' speaking?" translate, in the King's English, to "Do passive/aggressive insults from Brits belie our dismay at the collapse of our empire and failure of imperialism"?

 

[silky smoove]

Both versions have a specific use.

Me standing by myself talking about the drummer from a band I'm in: "My drummer"
Me standing with some or all of the members from a band I'm in: "Our drummer"

 

[lokikallas]

I would say "my pitcher" if I was on a baseball team, or "my quarterback" on a football team. Seems appropriate.

 

[LBS-bass]

Just thinking about this more. When you were a kid, and you had to go back home, did you go back to "my house" or "the house?" You didn't own that house; your parents, guardians, or the bank did.

 

[gln1955]

Good God, why do some people not understand the English labguage. My town, my school, my city. No one thinks you own them.

 

[Richard Lindsey]

I would say "my pitcher" if I was on a baseball team, or "my quarterback" on a football team. Seems appropriate.

Not to everyone. We all have our things, but personally, I'd never say "my" pitcher if I were on a baseball team; a team seems like just about the last context where "my" would be appropriate ... there being no "I" in "team." ;-)

I *might* say "my" if I were a bandleader who had hired and was paying everyone, but more likely not even then. I'd never say it if I were a member of any kind of collective unit or if I myself were a hired hand; it would seem, to me at least, a bit silly and presumptuous.

Beyond the connotations of a proprietary relationship that "my" carries for some--not necessarily ownership per se; could be pseudo-proprietary in the sense of employer to employee or even teacher to student--it can also carry the connotation that there's only one drummer (or let's say, a rather small number of drummers) available to or possible for you--sort of like "my spouse" in that regard (in most jurisdictions), or "my town."

For many of us, it doesn't make sense to think of drummers, or any other musicians, that way. There is this drummer or that drummer; a drummer I like or one I don't; a drummer I happen to play with or a drummer I don't. None of them are mine in any sense I employ.

Quibbles aside, this is an EXCEEDINGLY MINOR question that shouldn't cause anybody to lose sleep one way or the other. Perhaps it's a measure of our coronavirus stir-craziness that the question even comes up....

 

[bassobrutto]

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Does the question "Is this just America's legendary 'rugged individualism' speaking?" translate, in the King's English, to "Do passive/aggressive insults from Brits belie our dismay at the collapse of our empire and failure of imperialism"?

Why do you take this to be a passive-aggressive insult, if speaking of "my" drummer when referring to your band's drummer, even when you are not the BL or handpicking that drummer for a project, seems entirely natural or normal to you, as it plainly is for many on here? It's only an insult if you think being a rugged individualist is actually something to be ashamed of.

As for "exceedingly minor" question or "splitting hairs," I guess I would disagree, since I think the language people use in these situations reveals their deeper philosophical (dare I say "ontological") presuppositions about the relations between the self and the groups to which one belongs. When one is talking about a typical band situation, where bandmates are more or less "equals," I feel quite confident saying that most Brits and other Europeans (and quite possibly others around the world) would say "our" drummer, etc, while Americans seem to commonly speak of "my." Not saying one is better than the other. Just observing what I find to be an interesting cultural difference. If you don't find it interesting, then that's completely fine!

 

[garp]

As a Brit, I would always say "our" drummer, etc., because a band is obviously a "we" not an "I." To my ear, "my" drummer sounds like a kind of servant, someone who shows up to drum for me personally whenever I happen to need a few beats in my life.

U.K. and US are two countries divided by a common language...

Speaking as a drummer, I can definitively say that anyone using the phrase "my drummer" in my presence will quickly land "in hospital."

 

[lokikallas]

“My drummer” is like “ my brother” not “ my butler”.

 

[db59]

Over the ten years or so I have been visiting this site, it is hard not to notice how often people refer to their bandmates as "my" drummer, "my" guitarist, "my" singer, etc. As a Brit, I would always say "our" drummer, etc., because a band is obviously a "we" not an "I." To my ear, "my" drummer sounds like a kind of servant, someone who shows up to drum for me personally whenever I happen to need a few beats in my life. I click my fingers and he is magically there with me, pounding the skins, whether I am in the woodshed, driving to work, or walking the dog. So why do people talk like this? Is this just America's legendary "rugged individualism" speaking?

................and we are the rhythm section!!!