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"My" drummer?

#21
Reminds me of a story I heard about Mick Jagger and Charlie Watts. Mick called Charlie at 1am, drunk, and asked for "his drummer". Charlie got up, dressed in a suit, and went to Mick's room. When Mick answered the door he punched him in the face and said "Don't ever call me your ****ing drummer again. You're MY singer!"

I like to think that story is true lol
 
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#23
bassobrutto said:
Over the ten years or so I have been visiting this site, it is hard not to notice how often people refer to their bandmates as "my" drummer, "my" guitarist, "my" singer, etc. As a Brit, I would always say "our" drummer, etc., because a band is obviously a "we" not an "I." To my ear, "my" drummer sounds like a kind of servant, someone who shows up to drum for me personally whenever I happen to need a few beats in my life. I click my fingers and he is magically there with me, pounding the skins, whether I am in the woodshed, driving to work, or walking the dog. So why do people talk like this? Is this just America's legendary "rugged individualism" speaking?
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So, you tell people who don't know any members of your band, "our" band? "Oh, so yesterday, our drummer and I watched the funniest movie ever!" I don't know man? That just sounds odd to me. If someone is talking to me, the other band members have no involvement in any part of the conversation, and are absolutely no where in the vicinity, or don't even know there is a conversation about the band going on, I'm pretty sure saying "my band" is fairly acceptable. If you told me "our drummer" I'd probably think, "oh, is Tommy playing with you guys too?"
 
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#24
bassobrutto said:
As for "exceedingly minor" question or "splitting hairs," I guess I would disagree, since I think the language people use in these situations reveals their deeper philosophical (dare I say "ontological") presuppositions about the relations between the self and the groups to which one belongs.
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Gowlee, thems a lot o' big words. See post #15 for succinct elucidation on why they don't matter.

Seriously, this is a hill you want to die on here on TB? Have at it. I have more interesting things to worry about :)
 
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#28
Here in the states (Texas and the outer 49) "my drummer" simply refers to the notion that the drummer is chattel, beholden to the bassist in some cases or shared among the band like a P.A., for example. My drummer is free to come and go as he/she may please and may contribute to band decisions but cannot ever drive the van or be involved in financial decisions or negotiations. Too risky for the rest of us.
We would say "our singer", "our guitarist", or "our 2nd. chair bassoonist" for bands that have a bassoon section. To your point it would be inappropriate to refer to any non-drummer member of a band as "my".
 
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#33
Some of the the bands I played with, after as many times as they had to ride with me (car trouble ?!?), buy them a few drinks (already broke), and had to front them a little cash at times (see previous), well, till they paid me back, they WERE 'my drummer', 'my guitar player', and so on. Happens.
 
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#34
If I was chatting with another musician who said "our drummer" and that musician's band mates were not present, in the back of my mind I would need clarification on who else is included in "our", even if it has nothing to do with the point of whatever he or she is telling me.
 
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#36
Here (Australia) it's usually "our" or "the" drummer. I think intent matters, if people are implying ownership it would come off as arrogant but presumably few people are that big a fan of themselves. I think most of the time it's just describing a role like "my boss" or "my dentist" to someone who doesn't know the player name.
 
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#37
I was in a band with a drummer who had the need to create the perception to all his buddies that he was the most important member of the band. When his friends were around or he posted on Facebook it was always "My singer", "My Keyboard player", etc. He and I were among the founding members over ten years ago. From the beginning he struggled to play the material and in ten years never made any effort to improve. Finally, when we stopped playing bars and moved into concert theaters he had to be replaced. Now that I'm the only founding member I could refer to the other members as "My musicians" but I don't. I always say "Our singer", "Our guitarist", or "Our band".
 

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