Actually, after having read this thread in it's entirety, I agree with most of the original post, though some of it is meaningless out of context. So read the following with a little joviality, alright?
You've got other issues anyway, if something as simple as an overused phrase brings you to anger. Perhaps you feel you don't get taken seriously enough as a bass player by those you wish would. Maybe because you feel that one shouldn't settle for other's imposed limitations, you are a tad bit touchy when anyone says anything that implies you should limit yourself. There is something underlying your rant besides the phrases themselves.
At any rate, you take yourself, and these phrases way too seriously.
Lock in with the drummer? No way! When you play, you don't want to "lock in" with anyone. In fact, the next time you play out with a band, play a completely different song just to prove your point!
It's not about the groove at all. Nobody wants to feel music, they just want to watch you musically masturbate...especially the people you play with.
Overplaying isn't bad. Every musician in the band should overplay. Wouldn't it be cool if we all just started a new trend where all the musicians soloed over the top of each other, on every song, all night long? Way too cool.
Now before you go off on a tantrum, take a deep breath and relax. Then, lock in with your drummer, get in the groove...and for God's sake don't overplay!