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RATE MY FIRST RECORDING

sorry for the obnoxious caps lock but its the only way things get seen. my last thread got views but no replies.
i just threw a recording on my myspace. It's my first ever recording. I'm looking for some CONSRTUCTIVE critisism. You can be as mean as you want, as long as i get some advice out of it . i need help seeing where i suck:)

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thanks in advance
 
The caps lock, and then the apology for the caps lock isnt going to help your replies either.

There are many, many threads everyday that gets seen and they arent yelling. Perhaps nobody wanted to offer constructive criticism.
 
well then i dont know what to do then because ive done both. all i wanted was for people to critique my playing and tell me what i need to work on. i dont see why someone wouldnt want to help out a fellow bassist but maybe im just different and would offer constructive critisism to anyone who asked.
 
Listening to it now. I love your "genre": "Funk / Ambient / Crunk"

I can just imagine some band with bootsy, some crazed circut bender, and lil'John yelling YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!

Anywho..... Nice bass line imo. Really fits the song. :D

You really need to change the background tho. It's do visually noisy to be a background. Needs more black-space or something, considering that you chose white as the font color.
 
I think the song is awesome, the recording/tone itself could actually be better to present the song in a more polished way. For solo bass, I think the tone is a little dark/muddy and could be brighter. Just my opinion. Awesome song though, when I first heard it I thought there was singing, but I then I heard it was just bass. Really well constructed melody. Keep writing new stuff.
 
The playing is OK, but the lack of presence in the recording of it is downright distracting. You need to try running your bass right into your mixer, or run your "headphone out" to your board. If you are not using a mixer, and using a recorder only, try a simple pre amp on the bass and plug that straight in.
To me the music is not "here", but rather "over there"...almost like we're sitting "here", and the music is out in the hall....not a reverb or delay issue, but one of Presence.
I have found the inexpensive ART tube preamps and the Behringer Eurorack mixer to be just fine for home'demoing" use. :)
 
play with more conviction, the melodic lines are pretty tentative, overall the groove needs to be more prominent, the melodic lines also didnt say that much, it seemed more like they were being played because they fit with the chord

the chord ideas were nice bu there is a lot of muddling and I'm not talking about the recording quality which is another issue altogether, pan hard left & right so you can see the harmonization you are creating better and be mindful of what notes are colliding, also if you are using chorus on 2 different tracks that can also skew the focus

for a first recording is better than my first effort was