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Singer with not enough ego

Gaolee

Gaolee

Official leathers tester and crash dummy
Jan 13, 2010
24,735
172,088
Seattle, Great North Wet
#1
The lead singer ego is pretty well known, but the band I play upright in is retooling with a new singer and new drummer. The singer has a fantastic voice, but what's interesting is that she's a bit of a perfectionist and doesn't have the confidence to be loud, proud, and wrong when she forgets a word or makes a mistake. Maybe she will develop an ego over time as she settles in. Anyway, she has the opposite problem as too much ego, at least for now.
 
#3
Gaolee said:
The lead singer ego is pretty well known, but the band I play upright in is retooling with a new singer and new drummer. The singer has a fantastic voice, but what's interesting is that she's a bit of a perfectionist and doesn't have the confidence to be loud, proud, and wrong when she forgets a word or makes a mistake. Maybe she will develop an ego over time as she settles in. Anyway, she has the opposite problem as too much ego, at least for now.
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Does she sing out much, or is she kinda new to playing in bands?

Almost sounds like a lack of practical experience. Confidence is a pretty big part of singing in front of folks IMO.
 
#4
I think it is lack of experience. I don't know for sure, but she may not have sung in a band before. She says she plays piano but couldn't do that and sing at the same time. She will be very, very good when she gets it going. She's a PhD candidate of some kind, so she has a lot going on and doesn't show much sign of having any diva traits. She clearly can learn, so she will learn how to perform in front of an audience.

Anyway, I thought it would be refreshing to share an example of a singer who could use more ego instead of less ego.
 
#6
interp said:
I once worked in a blues band that hired a young inexperienced female singer with a great voice. She had apparently led a somewhat elite and sheltered existence prior to that because she objected strenuously to singing the word 'ain't.' Not a good match.
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She's got them "father will not let me access my trust fund for 6 more years so I will show him by rebelling and joining a blues band" blues.

;)
 
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#9
Has she worked in public yet?

I ask because I once found a KILLER singer who could sing anything he wanted and nail it on the first or second run through. We rehearsed a few times and got several songs down cold, then took it to an open mic. We signed up and were up third so we are hanging out waiting our turn and about two songs into the second band our new singer said he was not sure he was ready to go up on stage. We told him to just relax, it was an open mic and no big deal. He sat quietly until it was time for us to go up then he told us he was just not ready and was going to have to pass. We were able to cover it by doing a few songs the drummer sang, but it was not our best night.

LSS, he was so worried someone was going to not like his singing he refused to do it in front of strangers. People he knew were no problem, but couldn't overcome his fear of singing in front of strangers.
 
#11
xgator4u said:
I'm gonna go out on a limb here and take an educated guess.
Applied Psychology
or something similar ?
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Something to do with the mechanics of hearing. It seems pretty heavy duty and scientific, the way she talks about it. And, she's getting two PhDs, not just one. Go figure. Beats me how she has time to breathe, let alone sing, but I'm not complaining.
 
#12
fhm555 said:
Has she worked in public yet?

I ask because I once found a KILLER singer who could sing anything he wanted and nail it on the first or second run through. We rehearsed a few times and got several songs down cold, then took it to an open mic. We signed up and were up third so we are hanging out waiting our turn and about two songs into the second band our new singer said he was not sure he was ready to go up on stage. We told him to just relax, it was an open mic and no big deal. He sat quietly until it was time for us to go up then he told us he was just not ready and was going to have to pass. We were able to cover it by doing a few songs the drummer sang, but it was not our best night.

LSS, he was so worried someone was going to not like his singing he refused to do it in front of strangers. People he knew were no problem, but couldn't overcome his fear of singing in front of strangers.
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That's funny. People I don't know don't make me nervous, but people I do know do! I want people I care about to like my performance.
 
#13
fhm555 said:
Has she worked in public yet?

I ask because I once found a KILLER singer who could sing anything he wanted and nail it on the first or second run through. We rehearsed a few times and got several songs down cold, then took it to an open mic. We signed up and were up third so we are hanging out waiting our turn and about two songs into the second band our new singer said he was not sure he was ready to go up on stage. We told him to just relax, it was an open mic and no big deal. He sat quietly until it was time for us to go up then he told us he was just not ready and was going to have to pass. We were able to cover it by doing a few songs the drummer sang, but it was not our best night.

LSS, he was so worried someone was going to not like his singing he refused to do it in front of strangers. People he knew were no problem, but couldn't overcome his fear of singing in front of strangers.
Click to expand...

Yeah, see, that's kind of what I'm getting at.

IMO/IME singing in front of an audience isn't the most natural thing for anyone to do for a number of reasons. Even if you have tons of natural talent, the simple act of standing in front of an audience and singing is not mechanically trivial and requires confidence, or bravado. That additional act of fronting a band requires additional confidence, or bravado.

As a result, from what I've seen you have to force it with one of two methods, either genuine confidence or bravado/LSS.

Folks that have experience fall into one of those two categories to varying degrees. Some lean one way more, others less, but there's almost always a mixture of genuine and false confidence in anyone I've met that can successfully sing to an audience.

Lacking either is generally a sign of simple inexperience; once that person is experienced their "real" personality will come out.
 
#16
im a solid singer but lack the front man look at me thing....had it when i was younger but realised i was an ass. now i would like to have some it back to have better stage prescence, i have a hard time indulging in that part of the ego
 
#17
My bit of advice (for any singer, really): Commit to the message of the song. Deliver it the way an actor wood--"believe" in the context and content of the number, and then your own ego is not even part of the equation--you are the vehicle. Or, as Chevy Chase put it...

Ty+Webb+Chevy+Chase+be+the+ball+Danny+Noonan+Michael+O-Keefe.jpg


...Be the ball.
 

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