Strangest gigs?

[Jay Corwin]

About 10-12 years ago I was in a Psychobilly/Punk band and our drummer booked us at this bowling alley that had about 10 lanes, and hadn't been worked on for at least 30 years. Still had the manual scoring and all. He told the owner we we're a rockabilly band and would play Elvis and stuff. The stage was a huge piece of plywood they put down over the lanes for us to play on.

 

[The Owl]

Once did an outdoor BBQ gig in central MA and I kid you not, the mosquitoes were all over me constantly! Holy crap, i was even leaping every so often it got so ridiculous. And on top of that, the power kept going out every 3 songs or so. Very odd night. The highlight though was getting to ride back to Boston with a good friend I hadn't seen in a while.

 

[ashtray]

A couple of my worst, from 1994-1995:
My first band in college, a classic rock band, was asked to play an outdoor party at a farmer's market in Salem, VA. A few weeks before the gig, our singer quit, leaving us no time to find someone with the range to sing some of the covers we did (AC/DC, Queensrych). We took the first guy who auditioned and used him. He was so bad, that he gave up halfway through the AC/DC song and started rapping the lyrics.

OMG - I was *at* that show! I remember seeing a classic rock/VH cover band at the Stag Bowl party. What really stood out, besides the freezing temperatures, was the amazing guitarist you guys had. Dude could play! Yeah, as I recall - that singer was pretty bad. Sorry

 

[bevel19]

Once played a live band aerobics show. Had to learn 35 songs with BPMs starting at a warm up pace ,to very quick at about song 20-30 and then slowing down till song 35. All had to be played without a break between songs too. Very weird watching 400 women all doing exactly the same thing as we were playing. Took a few songs to get used to it ,very distracting when they were doing pelvic thrusts while lying on the floor.

 

[Sven Olaffson]

I play in a trio doing what we call "depressive pop-metal" (think alternative rock/metal on mid-tempo and kinda long tunes ... System of a Down on xanax covering Radiohead ...)

somehow the guitarist/singer managed to have us playing on a french country village annual fest ... We set up our gear on a "scene" facing a field with a glorified traditonal marketplace ... every 10 minutes (which means between each song or couple of songs) a spokeperson will be announcing a special deal on potatoes from Mr X or socks from Mrs Y ...

Talk about creating an atmosphere ...


at least we get paid, and not with potatoes ...

 

[seanm]

It wasn't too strange, but played a gig inside a silo. It was an old concrete silo, 12' to 18' across and about two stories high. No roof, although the trees are starting to cover it over.

One small window (probably an old grain chute where they got the grain out) and a door.

The acoustics where unbelievable!

Especially when the acoustic guitars played acoustically, the tone was to die for.

 

[Coelho]

I once played with a Metal band in a nursing home. Some folks there complained they couldn't hear it very well (we were playing LOUD).

 

[Lowbrow]

A cover band I was in during my junior year of high school played a dance at a mental institution every two weeks.

We once held a dance contest, which was a MAJOR mistake. The institution attendants had to restrain the contest's losers from attacking the judges (the band).

 

[Coelho]

I was also once hired to play in a city 24 hours away, by bus...
When we got there, we learned they thought they were hiring another band, totally diferent styles.

We had to improvise all the songs in realtime to adapt to what they were expecting.

 

[Doc Labyrinth]

A cover band I was in during my junior year of high school played a dance at a mental institution every two weeks.

We once held a dance contest, which was a MAJOR mistake. The institution attendants had to restrain the contest's losers from attacking the judges (the band).

Yes.

Awesome.

Thank you for inspiring my list of lifetime goals.

 

[Groovy Bastard]

About as close as I can get to genuinely bizarre, playing for the wrap-up/cast party of Harvard University's production of the German comic opera Der Fledermaus (I NEVER thought that operas could be comedic, much less German ones).

Anyways, it was supposed to be a jazz quartet thing organized by a very good friend who's a kick-ass trumpeter, with keys, drums and meself on fretless bass, doing Real Book tunes they asked for "danceable jazz" which you'd think would mean an emphasis on swing, right? Easy enough you'd think.

Well about three songs into the set, one of the folks approaches the stage and tells us half-apologetically that we were supposed to play waltzes the whole time. Of course they NEVER told us that beforehand.

Next thing you know we're scrambling through the Real Book playing ANYTHING in 3/4 time we can muster at sometimes ridiculous tempos (the participants were fond of a style called "Viennese Waltz" which is danced at sometimes whiplash inducing tempos, the opera is peppered with them apparently).

After what seemed like an eternity, it was over, they actually liked us and we packed up and headed home ( the handsome paycheck came a couple days later.

Biiiiizzzzzzaaaarrrrrrrrrrreeeeee.

Ha, some time ago I played with a jazz combo at an after-opera party, and they where going crazy dancing to Freddie Freeloader and singing along to Mercy Mercy Mercy! (the last one also included throwing their hands in the air on the accent in the middle of the head). Great audience, and I got some nice gigs out of that one.

 

[Zondra]

I was just visiting in a small town in California a few years back. The city had just built a new park with a band shell, and was now having live music every week. However, they didn't advertise, so no one knew there was live music. My friend & I were there watching the blues/rock band playing... and we were the ONLY people in the audience. Well, the band that was hired didn't have their regular bass player, and had a guitar player filling in. He was struggling. So, they asked the crowd (jokingly, since there were only 2 of us) if there was a bass player in the house. I stood up and said "sure" and jumped right in. I'm sure it completely baffled them. My friend ended up getting tired and went back to the hotel, and we played the night away to absolutely no audience, but had fun jamming.

Plenty of other bizzaar gigs, but that one stood out as a random, unexpected gig with a group of complete strangers.

 

[ZonGuy]

My walk of wierdness:

1) Subbed a Salsa gig in a trendy shopping mall - and found out all the other players except two were subs who didn't know how to play salsa (How many times can you play "Blue Bossa" and "Oye Come Va" on one gig. Oh, the shame.

2) Subbed a redneck wedding where the singer and keyboard showed up an hour late. If the wedding guests had kicked their asses, I would have joined in.

3) Played a private party for the commissioning of a nuclear sub in a flight museum. Barbara Bush was a no-show. Dude running the band insisted on playing Cajun watlzes when the sailors wanted to rock n roll. Bummer. Sailors were total gentlemen until the Commander left, then they lifted all the booze and split for parts unknown. Probably had enuff accordion.

4) Got booked in with a blues band to a bar we had never seen. Turned out to be a run down redneck joint. Singer was black and did not care for the confederate flag behind the stage. It was "Blues Brothers" all over.

5) Played bass for a rich saxophonist who wanted someone to rehearse JAZZ with. $150 for 2 hrs.

6) Subbed for two rest home jazz jobs and occasionally drop in on a Gospel Bluegrass session.

7) Recorded on numerous bar band promo CD's for bar bands that couldnt play that well. We had the local version of the Wrecking Crew rhythm section.

 

[cdef]

Once I was playing bass temporarily in a little combo basically consisting of guitar, violin and drums. The guitarist was also the singer and songwriter, a shy, rather tense guy. We had an outdoors gig in another town which I knew well, since my brother was living there. We got the gear ready and still had a good half-hour before the show when Mr Guitarist had to admit he'd forgotten to bring an instrument to play on.

Hey, no problem. My brother owned a nice 1981 Squier Strat and lived only a few blocks away, so I called him up and he agreed to let the guy borrow it for the gig. I set out to get it and said I'd be 20 minutes at the most. I actually made it in less than 15, but when I reached the gate there were some familiar vocal sounds coming from the stage. WTH?

As I heard later, the guy had panicked, grabbed an awful homemade guitar (with one string missing) that he'd found abandoned backstage, and insisted on starting the show early while I was getting him the Strat. All I could do was join them on stage, plug in, wait for a suitable break and play along for the rest of the set. As you might expect it didn't go very well. The guy was seething and refusing to make eye contact. He never touched the Squier.

After it was over we stowed the gear in the car and drove to the hotel in silence. As soon as we were out on the pavement he told us, in a barely controlled rage, that the band was finished as far as he was concerned. In our considered opinion it was nobody's fault but his own if that one gig went badly, but that must not have been how he saw it.

 

[SanDiegoHarry]

That's easy: The Lesbian Club of North County (LINK) here in San Diego. A room full of middle-aged plus, generally penile-hostile women, there to see the singer I backed (who had quite the rainbow following here in town). Were it not for a pair of very nice little old ladies who warmed up to me, the entire back-line might not have lived through that gig...

 

[Blunt]

Am currently rehearsing for a musical Bernstein's Trouble In Tahiti. Its full of fun odd time bars and some quite peculiar lyrics. Its very challenging to read this music. I may even start a thread for any bassists out there who had to suffer reading a Bernstein chart. Whats wrong with 4/4.Well he has a problem with it.

 

[Obe]

Did a double anniversary party, one of the guys in the band's parents in-law and brother-in-law were celebrating their 50th and 25th anniversaries and he said they had requested us to play the party. We play original rock, nothing too heavy, but none of it very blues or danceable.

As we were tuning up, our amps barely on, we heard cries of "TOO LOUD" from the older family members. We put the tuners on mute, and we put some Sinatra on at low volume, "still too loud". If you put the PA speakers on the side of your head like giant headphones, it would have been a comfortable volume...foreshadowing what was to come...We played as low as possible, probably could have sang loud enough without a PA, and were largely ignored, and the younger cousins of the family, who would have enjoyed us, left for some fast food.

I guess these don't count because we didn't do them but - since then, said band member has tried to get us to play for "free, but think of the exposure and possible CD sales!":
A work retirement party with the majority of the attendees in their 70's;
Several picnics where we would get there at noon, play a little, hang around, play some more, repeat, up until around 9:00 when the party broke up;
The opening of a used car lot, one of those small ones that are a converted gas station and the best car there is a near-mint condition Chrysler K-car;
The mother of all "what the heck did I get myself into joining this band anyway" gigs, the weeknight opening of a fancy doggy hotel. We would be playing last, after the dinner was over and dessert was served. Even the dogs would have left by then.

I am still hoping to play at a rich "exotic dancer's" birthday pool party or
the opening of a sports car dealership where the pay is laps at a track in the cars of your choice

 

[pklima]

One of my bands called Południca! ended up playing a set at a wedding while the regular wedding band took a break. Our flautist's friend was getting married and he's into reenacting medieval combat, so at some point a few of his friends burst in dressed in armor and swinging swords to kidnap the bride, and then a few more came to defend her. There was a duel and a guy dressed as a king showed up and told everyone to reconcile. Then we played for about a half hour so the guys in armor could dance to something that didn't sound too modern. The regular wedding band thought it was pretty cool. Oh, and of course to sound more "medieval" we played different songs than we usually do, meaning it was all songs I've never played or even heard so I faked everything. I don't think anyone noticed, though.

We're not a medieval or even folk band by any stretch of the imagination, we just don't have any electric instruments or guitars so can we project vaguely the right atmosphere, and a few of the members are into the whole medieval times thing so they own enough costumes to loan to the rest of the band.

While I'm at it, a couple of less weird ones. The following week we played at an early medieval festival and ended up playing two sets in a fallen willow tree.

Two days ago I played with a children's choir at a party for the 50th anniversary of an old parish priest taking his vows. Didn't actually know that's what it was until we got there, I only knew I had to show up in this tiny village with my bass at a certain time.

 

[Richland123]

I have played so many strange gigs over the years that it would take me pages to write them all. However, a funny story happened a few years ago when we were playing a local biker bar. These were some rough and tumble looking bikers but they loved our band and we are not considered a heavy band but just a classic rock type band. At one point in the night, I got the idea to play Happy Together by The Turtles just to see what would happen. We play the tune regularly. The entire bar full of nasty looking bikers were all singing along with us and it was so funny. I said that was a perfect Harley Davidson TV commercial. I could see these bikers riding down the road singing to their bikes, "Imagine me and you, I do, I think about you day and night, it's only right, So, happy together."

 

[Tom Servo]

Two come to mind.

The first was the local Royal Order of the Elks Lodge. It was a senior citizen's dance. We were a rock band of 17-18 year olds. Fortunately, we knew a few 50's standards, and we were able to play a few of our originals in that style. The crowd was already pretty sauced, and the ladies really liked our singer.

At the end of the gig, the guy in charge (wearing a Korea-era Navy uniform) came up and said, "I wasn't sure when I saw you guys...you know [points at drummer's blue, spiked hair]. But you did good. Come back again some time."

The other was the final night for a venue that had been condemned. In fact, it had been condemned several days before and wasn't even supposed to be occupied. Pieces of plaster from the ceiling were falling on us while we played.