The Joke Thread

[Thunderscreech]

Delta Faillines


And Username FAILS another thread.

Maybe he enjoys this. Maybe there is a new paraphilia of the Internet age: Failaphilia: getting pleasure from FAILING!

 

[armywalaby]

Fail.

 

[fo shizzle]

BOO!! I'm back. That joke thread is what got me kicked from this place for a year and a half. Believe me, I'm using all my restraint from posting more jokes

I just revisited the original thread. Good lord!!!! Weren't we full throttle that day??

It's a shame you were gone for so long. In a way, you were undone by the thread just tumbling downhill.

That thread gets closed before page 2 today.

 

[excane]

We were on fire that day... damn, there are jokes in there that I even forgot I told.

 

[EricF]

Since this thread is in the failroad...

 

[T.O.Bass]

I just revisited the original thread. Good lord!!!! Weren't we full throttle that day??

It's a shame you were gone for so long. In a way, you were undone by the thread just tumbling downhill.

That thread gets closed before page 2 today.

Link??

 

[excane]

Link??

Enjoy the downward spiral of filth...
http://www.talkbass.com/forum/showthread.php?t=331069

 

[Atoz]

BOO!! I'm back. That joke thread is what got me kicked from this place for a year and a half. Believe me, I'm using all my restraint from posting more jokes

Didn't think we'd be seeing you... where the hell have you been?

 

[excane]

Banned, that's where.

 

[Atoz]

The whole time?

 

[excane]

Yes sir.

It's ok....I managed to survive somehow

 

[Atoz]

Yes sir.

It's ok....I managed to survive somehow

I don't know how you managed.


OT is like crack.

 

[excane]

I don't know how you managed.


OT is like crack.

So is buying basses, basses, more basses, and pedals. I had to feed the addiction somehow.

 

[MakiSupaStar]

 

[doctorjazz]

Putting this back on topic for one post so I can share something I heard recently that still tickles me every time I think about it:

On a Trans-Atlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm. The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning.

One woman in particular loses it. Screaming,she stands up in the front of the plane. "I'm too young to die!" she wails. Then she yells, "Well, if I'm going to die, I want my last minutes on earth to be memorable! No one has ever made me really feel like a woman! Well I've had it! Is there ANYONE on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN??"

For a moment there is silence. everyone has forgotten their own peril, and they all stare, riveted, at the desperate woman in the front of the plane. Then, a man stands up in the rear of the plane. "I can make you feel like a woman," he says. This tall, tanned and built guy with jet black eyes starts to walk slowly up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt one button at a time.

No one moves. As this man approaches, the woman begins to get excited. He removes his shirt. Muscles ripple across his chest as he reaches her, and extends the arm holding his shirt to the trembling woman, and whispers: "Iron this."

 

[JacobE]

"...the aristocrats!"

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH YES! that is the best joke ever

 

[excane]

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH YES! that is the best joke ever

Really depends on WHO'S telling and HOW they're telling it. It's one of those jokes that's all in the delivery.

 

[Nyarlathotep]

Awesome. And im just discovering how crack is similar to OT. Not really but sharpies are fun.....

 

[Thunderscreech]

A preacher was giving a sermon in church. As he got to the fire-and-brimstone part, there was loud boom, and the Devil himself appeared in a column of flame. Everyone panicked and rushed from the church, save on old man in the front row.
The Devil walked over to him
"Aren't you afriad of me?" he asked.
"hell no!" said the old man "I've been married to your sister for 30 years!"

 

[username n/a]

OK, so I just thought of this one.
Why didn't the cellist have an end pin?










Because he was baroque!!!