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the wife

1. how supportive are they of you as a bass player?

Very supportive. They like that I have a hobby and it gets me out of the house and socializing. I am introverted and a homebody by nature.

2. do you have to go through them before buying new gear?

No but I usually let them know if I'm spending over $1k.

3. have you ever had to resort to a 'black money op'?

No.

4. do you seek their consul regarding your playing?

Not really but I do ask for their opinion on songs to learn/play.

5. do they attend your gigs if you are a gigging bass player or would you want them to if you aren't?

Yes, they attend about 90% of my shows. My cover band plays 1-2 times per month and it's a fun excuse for everyone to go out to a bar.

6. are they a musician too? if so, what instrument (or tool, if you prefer that terminology) do they play?

No.

7. do they share the same music tastes as you?

There's about 75% overlap in our music tastes.

8. how important is it to you that they share an interest in music?

It's important that they are happy with my hobbies and don't feel like music is having a negative impact on our relationship. I don't expect them to geek out over instruments or music as much as I do but it's nice they put up with my nonsense.
 
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1. how supportive are they of you as a bass player?
Very, but likes to give me crap
2. do you have to go through them before buying new gear?
Yes, Family budget is family business
3. have you ever had to resort to a 'black money op'?
No
4. do you seek their consul regarding your playing?
No
5. do they attend your gigs if you are a gigging bass player or would you want them to if you aren't?
Yes
6. are they a musician too? if so, what instrument (or tool, if you prefer that terminology) do they play?
No
7. do they share the same music tastes as you?
50%
8. how important is it to you that they share an interest in music?
They understand and accept its interest to me, that is all that matters
 
or partner, whatever term suits you best. referred to as 'they' 'their; and 'them' here, but no offence meant if you prefer alternative/more relevant pronouns.

some questions, HONEST answers would be appreciated:

1. how supportive are they of you as a bass player?
2. do you have to go through them before buying new gear?
3. have you ever had to resort to a 'black money op'?
4. do you seek their consul regarding your playing?
5. do they attend your gigs if you are a gigging bass player or would you want them to if you aren't?
6. are they a musician too? if so, what instrument (or tool, if you prefer that terminology) do they play?
7. do they share the same music tastes as you?
8. how important is it to you that they share an interest in music?

thank you.

please feel free to add and answer any additional questions....
I'm lucky in terms of my partner. Any in the past that didn't support my musical endeavors ended up left behind quickly. My wife has been awesome aboyt it though. It took a year or so for her to start noticing new basses showing up, and it was a topic of conversation for a minute. However, she has since decided that she didn't really care. Probably because I started buying, repairing and selling basses last year so even I can't keep up with the revolving door of basses. She comes to shows and I absolutely ask her opinion when I work on new material.
 
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Married 12 years.

1. how supportive are they of you as a bass player?
Rather supportive, though I don’t think it’s particularly important to them that I be a bassist. Definitely more supportive of playing in groups that get paid hahaha!

2. do you have to go through them before buying new gear?
No, but as a matter of respect I always inform her of any purchase I’m considering or intending to make, and consider her input and opinion on it when making these choices.

3. have you ever had to resort to a 'black money op'?
No, that’s lying/sneaking around and not healthy in a relationship.

4. do you seek their consul regarding your playing?
Only to ask if my flubs were noticeable.

5. do they attend your gigs if you are a gigging bass player or would you want them to if you aren't?
Almost every one.

6. are they a musician too? if so, what instrument (or tool, if you prefer that terminology) do they play?
Not in a serious capacity, but she loves to sing and is a karaoke junkie (we both are kinda).

7. do they share the same music tastes as you?
Her tastes are way cooler than mine.

8. how important is it to you that they share an interest in music?
Not nearly as important as it was when I was younger. I’ve grown less interested in it as I’ve aged, to be honest. So long as she doesn’t hate music, that’s good enough. No worries of that, so we’re all good!
 
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  1. 100% supportive
  2. No I do not need to go through her for new gear, however much (but not all) of my new gear is purchased through a "gear fund" that comes from gigging.
  3. Black money Op? LOL....no.
  4. I do not seek her counsel regarding playing
  5. She sometimes attends my gigs
  6. Yes, she was a vocalist in two of my bands (last one for 9 years....but no longer).
  7. Our music tastes aren't completely they same (she likes lots of horns, I don't) but they are mildly similar.
  8. It's not important at all that she shares an interest in music.
That said, we've been together 40 years this August. She was "the hot vocalist" in my first band. Then I gigged from the 90's to about 2016 without her. In 2016 we formed a band together, and she dropped out last year to take care of her 86 year old mother.
 
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Reactions: sonic boogaloo
or partner, whatever term suits you best. referred to as 'they' 'their; and 'them' here, but no offence meant if you prefer alternative/more relevant pronouns.

some questions, HONEST answers would be appreciated:

1. how supportive are they of you as a bass player?
2. do you have to go through them before buying new gear?
3. have you ever had to resort to a 'black money op'?
4. do you seek their consul regarding your playing?
5. do they attend your gigs if you are a gigging bass player or would you want them to if you aren't?
6. are they a musician too? if so, what instrument (or tool, if you prefer that terminology) do they play?
7. do they share the same music tastes as you?
8. how important is it to you that they share an interest in music?

thank you.

please feel free to add and answer any additional questions....

1. Very supportive of me as a musician in general (I don't think she discriminates between instruments 🤣)
2. No, although for a big purchase I would talk to her first. There was one time when a bass arrived I hadn't told her about (a cheap one), and she wasn't too impressed though.
3. No, but I'm a self-employed musician, and I have a separate business account, so all gear purchases go through that anyway. So maybe that means yes? I don't know.
4. Not normally.
5. Yes, occasionally she does.
6. She wouldn't call herself a musician, but she does play piano/keyboard.
7. There is some overlap. There's plenty I like that she doesn't, and a little that she likes that I don't.
8. I think it could be difficult if she didn't have any interest in it. It's always good to be able to relate to what your partner does.

Having said that she doesn't discriminate between instruments - she doesn't - but, I do think she'd prefer it if I played more bass (headphone amp) and less sax (no quiet option) 🤣
 
No longer married, but when I was:

1. how supportive are they of you as a bass player? Very
2. do you have to go through them before buying new gear? No
3. have you ever had to resort to a 'black money op'? No
4. do you seek their consul regarding your playing? No
5. do they attend your gigs if you are a gigging bass player or would you want them to if you aren't? She came to a few
6. are they a musician too? if so, what instrument (or tool, if you prefer that terminology) do they play? No, not musical at all, but a visual artist
7. do they share the same music tastes as you? No even remotely
8. how important is it to you that they share an interest in music? It will be next time
 
or partner, whatever term suits you best. referred to as 'they' 'their; and 'them' here, but no offence meant if you prefer alternative/more relevant pronouns.

some questions, HONEST answers would be appreciated:

1. how supportive are they of you as a bass player?
2. do you have to go through them before buying new gear?
3. have you ever had to resort to a 'black money op'?
4. do you seek their consul regarding your playing?
5. do they attend your gigs if you are a gigging bass player or would you want them to if you aren't?
6. are they a musician too? if so, what instrument (or tool, if you prefer that terminology) do they play?
7. do they share the same music tastes as you?
8. how important is it to you that they share an interest in music?

thank you.

please feel free to add and answer any additional questions....
1. Very! We met while I was playing and she attends every gig!
2. No
3. No
4. No
5. Yes -See above
6. No
7. Yes
8. It is not an end all type thing, but it is nice that she does
 
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or partner, whatever term suits you best. referred to as 'they' 'their; and 'them' here, but no offence meant if you prefer alternative/more relevant pronouns.

some questions, HONEST answers would be appreciated:

1. how supportive are they of you as a bass player?
2. do you have to go through them before buying new gear?
3. have you ever had to resort to a 'black money op'?
4. do you seek their consul regarding your playing?
5. do they attend your gigs if you are a gigging bass player or would you want them to if you aren't?
6. are they a musician too? if so, what instrument (or tool, if you prefer that terminology) do they play?
7. do they share the same music tastes as you?
8. how important is it to you that they share an interest in music?

thank you.

please feel free to add and answer any additional questions....
1. She's fine with it
2. Yes, if I dont want a divorce, unless I am flipping some gear, in which case it doesnt matter.
3. I can neither confirm nor deny any "black money" ops
4. No
5. No
6. No
7. Some we share, some we dont, but we are both willing to listen to new things.
8. She's from Honduras so her exposure to music was very different growing up, but she knows good music when she hears it and there are very very few artists that we disagree on. For example, she loves Motorhead, and Lemmy, which I exposed her to. She loves Willie Nelson, and Tina Turner and Dolly Parton as much for them being cool people as for their legendary music. I have even learned some things listening to her Latin music, like Kany Garcia and Juan Gabriel, and I turned her onto the Texas Tornadoes. I'm lucky that she is as open to different kinds of music as I am.
 
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