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That just plain sounds dir-tay! But, I'd watch that movie.
Yeah, the Golden Cello's name is misleading.
The closest that I've personally heard is the Ebow with a bit of overdrive on it sounds sort of close, although I'm not sure about the effect(s) used, as it wasn't me playing.
The EHX Microsynth claims to have a string sound to it if you cut or minimize the original signal and increase the attack delay some, it can sound string-like. Don't believe it. I love that pedal, but it's never been close enough to a cello or string sound for me to use it ever.