Your best pick-up lines

[pie_man_25]

"may I buy you a drink?...no?... How 'bout breakfast in bed?"

 

[Hoover]

"Nice Shoes,...wanna ****?"

I tried that one -- minus the "Nice shoes" part -- on a first date when I was 15 years old.

Did not work.

But it was a learning experience for sure, so I remember it fondly. Or awkwardly.

 

[Hoover]

"If I asked you to have sex with me, would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this question?"

Ha! Strange Loops! Douglas Hofstadter would be proud.

 

[machine gewehr]

"I'm a boob expert,want a free mammogram?"

 

[MatticusMania]

You must be wearing galactic underwear, cause your ass is out of this world.

Galactic underwear does sound a bit classier than space pants.

 

[Bob Lee (QSC)]

Say babe, EMGs or Seymour Duncans?

 

[Ziltoid]

Say babe, EMGs or Seymour Duncans?

If she picks seymour you can make a Quarter pounder joke!

 

[Jim Nazium]

Hey baby, you wanna come over to my place and check out my Bartolinis?

This is a pickup line! Bartolini's = pickups! I just got that, after, like, a whole day.

 

[MikeyFingers]

Hey baby, can I buy you a fish sandwich?

 

[manbearpig97]

Me: So, I just got out of an abusive relationship.
Them: Aw Im sorry.
Me: So, think you can take a punch?

 

[pie_man_25]

Me: So, I just got out of an abusive relationship.
Them: Aw Im sorry.
Me: So, think you can take a punch?

I don't know whether to laugh or to say that's incredibly inappropriate and that you're a terrible person.

 

[Munjibunga]

I don't know why, but that made me laugh pretty hard.

How about:

Hey sweet-thang, how about we go back to my pad, and I'll let you play with my Dingwall.

Combine them. "Hey baby, I've got Bartolinis in my Dingwall. Wanna see?"

 

[BassRookie]

My **** just died.

Can I bury it in your ass?

 

[manbearpig97]

I don't know whether to laugh or to say that's incredibly inappropriate and that you're a terrible person.

Chill out dude, I'm just kidding.

 

[pie_man_25]

Chill out dude, I'm just kidding.

I understand that, I'm just not sure about what's okay to joke about or not, I wasn't personally offended, though some may well have been.

 

[Ziltoid]

I'm sure some people get offended at the sight of freakin kittens.

 

[walksupright]

"Hey babe, I'm really a guitar player - I'm just subbing on bass tonight."

 

[colcifer]

"Hey babe, I'm really a guitar player - I'm just subbing on bass tonight."

 

[BioDriver]

"Just go out with me, I take longer to give up than Brett Favre."

 

[NateS]

"I'm a magician...I can make 7 inches disappear really quick, wanna see?"

At a restaurant, "so, I know we just met, but would you like to fork?" Holding a fork. Ha, ha.

Good stuff.