I have a valid reason for hating the Cooper Mini.
I don't fit in it.
Not in the seats.... in the trunk.
We joked around and tried to trap each other in the trunks of certain small vehicles, a few years ago at the NAIAS. We couldn't fit me into the cargo area inside the hatchback of one of the Minis.
People.
If I cannot pack ME worth of anything, how the hell am I supposed to use this car? If I've got a family, or hell even just friends with me, and we stop to buy supplies for a backyard barbeque and campfire, it would be impossible. There is absolutely no room in that cargo area. I certainly can't fit one of my basses in it while still in its case, the thing's too narrow. If I packed my medium-sized cooler, the tailgate would never close.
The Cooper Mini is an impractical car. It is too small for anything I could ever envision doing with my friends.
Not to mention I don't even fit in the back seat, with Matt sitting in the front seat. He needs to slide it all the way back just to get his knees in. Then there's nowhere for my feet to fit under his seat. When we tried this, I was crying out to keep him from leaning back cuz his weight already started crushing my toes!
Most embarrassing car I've ever sat in. Shameful.